A couple of things: although the opening paragraphs you have listed are very well written, it feels almost...half-finished? Though you described the Coruscant underworld in fair detail, you didn't really put your character in an actual setting. We don't know exactly where in the underworld your character is right now. Perhaps you could edit the post and establish an "opening scene"? (cont.)
Another thing you have to consider is plot. Your character is searching for his mother and wants to get information from a criminal organization, which is fine. However, being a high-ranking officer in such a faction, I am reticent to post. The main reason is because you have put me into a position where I have to either create a story about the mother and her whereabouts (cont.)
and potentially upset you by the plot I've chosen, or I have to ask you constantly about what direction you want the story to go.
Assuming you already know what you want to have happened to the mother, I suggest that you create an NPC gang that would have been involved somehow (if that is the case), and then I would be able to easily play my criminal and hook your character up with said NPC gang. (cont.)