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As Nor'Baal offered to purchase the Orcs, Flex's eyes widened in horror. Quickly, he ripped off the sack as Kap'n Kai and Door Clutter began their show with the giant. His mournful dirge echoed throughout the massive halls of Nor'Baal's palace, as his entourage and guests became enraptured by...

Flex helped Doorcuttah load the giant into the massive sack, dumping out all the snacks he had brought for this adventure. "You can take lunch now, Sore Flutter." Plastic-wrapped sandwiches and small jukeboxes sad on the grassy field. "That goes for the rest of y'all, too. Feel free to have a...

As the heavenly sound of Gore Lover's voice carried into the hills, the entire landscape responded. Birds in trees responding with their own song, adding a symphonic collection of the galaxy's most beautiful voices. It was almost enough to drive Flex to tears. In fact, it was enough. Flex began...

Flex had indeed thought the Mandillian giants were blue. However, embarrassed by his failure, he chose to sidestep his captain's obvious annoyance by ignoring it altogether. "Blue is a sneaky color." Flex almost wept when he heard Floor Nutter story about wanting to be an opera singer. He was...

Flex had a decidedly different approach to stealth. Buzzed on Emergy and generally dumb, he first reached for the blue paint and coated himself in it, followed by the Air Gator 10s that Core Buttah had so generously supplied. Now dripping with blue paint wearing alligator socks, he gave a thumbs...

As the revelers were slowly but surely cut down by a combination of drug-induced knockouts, vomiting spells, or just outright murder, Flex took stock of his surroundings. He realized, for the last few minutes, he had just been savagely beating on a coat rack with a jacket and hat. His hands were...

The Sith had asked an excellent question - what kind of plant was Flex? The only way he could answer that is through continued dance. In mushroom-induced jubilation, they shimmied, circled, and wiggled to a shared psychic rhythm. They were smooth with it. All that mattered. The moment blaster...

Flex was about to respond to all the parties gathered when, suddenly, he wasn't there. He was floating, out of his body, up above the ship, through the dense metal hull, into the galaxy itself. The side effect of Kodi's incessant spiking of every can of Emergy, combined with the shrooms he had...

The Emryc Energy procedure had worked. Now the Orc could talk - Flex remained oblivious to the inner workings of this success, and only noted that for the future Emergy could indeed be used as medicine. He would have to include it in his sales pitch. Speaking of... "Yo, bro. Seems like you're...

It sounded like the death throes of a portly hog. Was that basic he was speaking? Wasn't any variety of Orcish he had heart recently. Maybe he needed to visit home sometime. Flex, perfectly oblivious, completely ignored the droid-parrots whining. The problem was, with Doorcuttah's booming voice...

PARTY YACHT A party was well-earned for the intrepid crew of the Scurvy Fox. After a truly dashing and daring set of escapades involving slick space maneuvers, bloodstained ladles, energy drink sales, and bad disguises, a break from the chaos was necessary. Of course, said break would only...

With Kai's fantastic disruption of enemy lines, Flex had the opportunity to finish off the final two guards with Duran. And then, silence. It was over. And they had won handily; completely outperformed this banking vessel with a few quick-witted maneuvers. Praise the gods of luck and fate! Flex...

Whew. An impressive maneuver. They were off to a good start. The Scurvy Fox jettisoned towards the cargo craft, and Flex guided the boarding clamps towards the hull, anchoring their ships to one another. For better or for worse, they had to get it done, now. They were locked in tight. Vapor...

Kai struck the engines! Amazing! This was already off to a better start than the last raid. "THEY DON'T KNOW YOU, SON!" The Orc bellowed to his crew. The first shot was the riskiest - a mistake there would have cost the entire group. Now, they were preparing for the inevitable onslaught. From...

Flex clicked his boots and saluted. "No promises on the push ups, Captain." He wore an armor set hastily welded together from scrap metal and a dream. His helmet, more like a sport helmet with imposing tusks hastily tacked on, uncomfortably slid over his face. He banged his chest twice. "Let's...

"That's funny. We do a lot of work in salvage, too." Salvaging goods from their rightful owners. "But I'm a chef by trade. And a personal trainer. So, let me know if you're ever trying to get some reps in, bro." He didn't specify who 'bro,' was in this case - compared to him, everyone was tiny...

No way to hide it - this raid had been a failure. Flex felt ashamed. While the lettuce slap didn't elicit any external reaction - the lettuce only wetly limping against his chiseled boulder of a face - inside, his mood was dark. And when he was ashamed, there was only one thing he could do to...

Plop, plop, plop. Sleek shot excellently, after her teammate's embarrassing first attempt at a shot. "Not too bad," Flex noted breezily as the shot sank in. "But eight ball is my game." Being a chef and a fitness ICON gave Flex a certain kind of nimbleness that was overshadowed by his hulking...

The clock was counting down. As the 'Take-Out Bandits' traversed the halls of the mighty pleasure cruiser, Flex's grin only widened beneath his (literally) paper-thin disguise. This was the easiest money he had made in a long time - perks of having a partner. He hauled ass through that ship with...

His eyes narrowed at the little man before him. "I only eat the ones that lose." A tusky grin crept to his face. Of course, he did have a doubles' partner: His partner-in-crime, Kodi. In the midst of his own con, no doubt. The pair were hustlers at heart, and he didn't want to interrupt...