HoloNet News Have No Fear, The ISC is Here!

JJ Johnson

Character
Independent
Rank
Bugle Chief Editor

Character Profile
Link
OOC
Rhogar
Joined
Jan 9, 2021
Messages
20
Reaction score
45


All would once again be right in the galaxy as the Galactic Bugle theme blared over the holo-channels. Unlike before where various scenes of riots against Force users were played before, they were replaced by images of the prison escape, the most shocking of them, what appeared to be a legless man, clawing himself to safety. Other images of Jedi victories and defeats also showed, though this time, they weren't accompanied by the usual hashtags. At the end of the theme, a list of names would flash, the honored dead and the victorious dead of recent battles.

As the theme ended, JJ Johnson sat behind his iconic desk, cigar clamped between his teeth like a vice and a glass of scotch in hand. The media icon had been absent for months following multiple attempts on his life and accompanied by some outlandish rumors. That broad grin would break as he took a puff from his cigar and blew out the perfect smoke ring. "WE ARE BACK, BUGLERS!" JJ shouted out triumphantly. "They tried to kill me four times! And four times I refused to die!" He had a good ol' hearty laugh then took a swig of his scotch.

He would lean back in his chair, that broad grin returning "Do we have a lot of good news to share, but first! First! I got a message for the Jedi Order! As you Buglers know, the Jedi I liked the most, trusted the most, was Jedi Master Tionson, he fell on Denon a hero! And it took my criticism and the loss of such a titan for the Jedi to get it under control! So Jedi! I was wrong before and I am a big enough man to admit when I'm wrong! But if you stray from this current course of good you're doing, I will be there to chide you back!" he'd slam his palm on the desk. "So as of right now, the Jedi are no longer Menaces! But Sith! You're still your wormy and gutless Pajama Bandit selves!"

He would take a pause to take a mighty pull from his cigar and blow out three perfect smoke rings. "Now, then. The Galactic Bugle is proud to announce a new addition to our family! Miss @Lymsleia Tane ! She will be our new boots on the ground and we couldn't be happier!"

"Now then Buglers! What you came here to really see! The dirty truths of the galaxy! Play it!"
Various clips would play from the Jailbreak, Rangers getting thrown everywhere, two Rangers standing idly by as Darth Raze, a man the galaxy thought was defeated on Denon, returned and merely waltzed into the jail freed a prisoner and then executed a Ranger. And finally, the earlier clip, of a legless man clawing himself to a surprisingly easy earned freedom.

When the clip ended, JJ looked a mixture of disgusted, speechless, and then even more disgusted. "Rangers! Stay doing what you're good at! This isn't it! Either you're underfunded, poorly led, or woefully unprepared! It is just time to stop! A legless man escaped? Unaided? That is embarrassing! And though the Chief will likely throw this man!" he'd point to the still of Corran. "The blame falls on two people! The Chief! And the Chancellor! Two MENACES that have let too many good men and women die by their gator arms and tight pocket books! You want the Rangers to protect high value prisons? PAY THEM FOR IT! Poor management and poor leadership!"

He would take a pause to sip from his glass of scotch, needing some quick hydration. "I SUPPORT OUR RANGERS! I DO NOT SUPPORT CHIEF HUDSON! But with all these blunders, President Thorne of the ISC is launching our own version of the Rangers! This one will be well-funded, more prepared, and far better trained! Not to mention they are benefitting greatly from the ISC's investments in MC and their association with Blackwell! They are going to combat the AMS, the Sith, everything! In fact, I, JJ Johnson am donating one million credits to the ISC Rangers! And another one million credits to the Ranger Operations targeting the AMS! Ha-haa! Look at that! A private citizen giving more money in a day to the Rangers than the Chancellor has alotted them in a year!" He would take a puff from his cigar and blow out another perfect ring. "IT IS TIME FOR CHIEF HUDSON TO STEP DOWN! HASHBROWN CANCEL CHIEF HUDSON! HASHBROWN CHIEF CORRAN VELT! I DON'T EVEN LIVE THERE, AND I AM ROOTING FOR YOU! BUGLERS! THIS IS JJ JOHNSON AND THIS IS ALL THE TIME WE HAVE FOR TONIGHT!" He would rise from his desk, both hands raised in victory. It was good to be back.

The Image would fade into the theme with a message that read "RIP Ranger Coulter, Defend and Protect." followed by #CancelChiefHudson and #SithArePajamaBanditMenaces
 
Last edited:
Top