Open Yavin IV The Potluck: Part Three

[Ruzaan Kai]

Stay alive. The mantra resonated with Ruzaan; the more he got to know Arctus, the more he worried for the older Padawan's wellbeing. Arctus' response, while sweetened with possible romantic themes, also brought more questions than answers. Ruzaan was beginning to realize, through his own journey, that being in survival mode was not sustainable forever; it wore you down and tired you out until you questioned if the effort was worth it. Furthermore, Arctus claimed that his passion was to meet and thank the mystery mandalorian; if that goal was all that was encouraging Arctus to stay alive, what would the older padawan do after he had found her? The fog in his head that had cleared just moments before came rushing back, further frustrating the Togruta's efforts to continue the conversation.

Perhaps it was for the better, thought; these were not the kinds of questions to be asked at a party, especially one as well-attended as this one. Clove waved at a blue-skinned Twi'lek who had made a beeline for the food upon entering, and Ruzaan was once again caught staring (this time at the snack table) when the half-Sephi expressed her gratitude at being able to meet him and Arctus.

Ruzaan couldn't help but smile at her, even as he struggled to evaluate their growing acquaintance. Her bubbly enthusiasm and short stature reminded Ruzaan of his younger tribe-mates back on Shili, but he guessed that she was probably a year or two older than him which threw that mental image out the window. In addition, her passion for Force Healing made him curious if she could help answer his questions, and he resolved to try and seek her out at a later time. For now, though, they could enjoy the party together.

"Thank Arctus" Ruzaan replied, jerking a thumb in the older padawan's direction. "He's the one that started this." Ruzaan glanced at Arctus and smiled his gratitude up at him.

@LilyNion @Forsythe Crowholde

 

[Xiann]

As the Twi’lek quick stepped to the snacks one of the padawans threw a smile and wave over at her, she responded with a weak and clearly forced smile and s slight nod in greeting before lowering her head again and focusing on the snacks. As she scanned the table for something delicious to help her relax a little, she couldn’t help but overhear the conversations nearby.

The group with the young woman that greeted her seemed to be talking about their goals, what path they wanted to go down, their passions. Xiann let out a small sigh as she reached out and picked up a cookie, “Must be nice.” She murmured to herself, bringing the cookie to her lips, “I haven’t had passion for months.” She threw the cookie into her mouth and began to chew. The sweetness of it quickly washed away the moment of bitterness she just had and doing it’s part to relax her.

When the pretty one suddenly blurted out how she was happy to meet the others, Xiann instinctively tried to giggle at the nervous and manic energy it seemed to be carried by, however with a mouth full of cookie all she managed to do was choke. She quickly turned away from the food and coughed. She managed to not breath in the cookie bits, but had probably made a bit of a spectacle of herself. Her anxiety washed over her once more. She froze in place not wanting to look around and see if anyone was looking at her, judging her, mocking her inability to even eat correctly. What should she do? What could she do?

@LilyNion @Forsythe Crowholde @SlagathorTheUnknown

 

[Ruzaan Kai]

Ruzaan's worries of Arctus' future problems were interrupted by a problem in the present- a Twi'lek girl inhaling a cookie, in the worst sense of the term. Thankfully, before he could figure out which color a blue Twi'lek turned while choking (more blue?), the crumbs cleared themselves and the danger averted. In the aftermath, Ruzaan wore a few cookie crumbs and the other padawan wore a look of embarrassment.

As much as Ruzaan wanted to move on from the incident for her sake, his first reaction was to ensure that she wasn't still choking. "Can you breathe?" he asked, moving quickly and grabbing a water bottle from the table. "That was me a few minutes ago" he lied, smiling to try and ease her anxiety. "I'd told Arctus that these cookies were so good that they'd be the death of me- and next one almost was! This'll help" he said, handing her the water bottle. Perhaps, as he did so, she would notice the scar running along the back of his hand up his forearm where his sleeve had slipped up. Ruzaan resisted the urge to push his sleeve back into place. Scars are not a mark of shame he reminded himself; words he hadn't believe until just now. They're the mark of a survivor. This Twi'lek certainly was the latter.

@LilyNion @Forsythe Crowholde @Xian

 

[Arctus Friers]

He... probably shared too much, didn't he?

By the end of his tale, a dusting of faint red had already spread across Arctus's cheeks. Still caught up in the fantasy of the probability of meeting his lady Mando again, the former smuggler blinked and nearly jumped out of his skin at Clove's exclamation. He stared at the half-Sephi, uncomprehending for a brief moment, before her message sunk in. The smile that appeared on Arctus's face was akin to the sun breaking free of the clouds and – unable to help himself –he'd lifted a hand to give her head a light, appreciative pat.

At Ruzaan's reply the faint red on Arctus's face turned into a full-blown blush, and his free hand found the Togruta's head to give him the same pat he'd given Clove. The two Padawans reminded him of his siblings, and the expression on the former smuggler's face turned from embarrassment into that of gratitude and humility.

Taking one step backwards, the older Padawan gave both Clove and Ruzaan a bow before rising back to his full height with a boyish grin.

"Nah – thank you two, really," he told them sincerely, a twinkle in his hazel grey eyes. "You shouldn't have bothered with an old man and yet here you are. So thank you, really. I'm glad I met you two."

In this exact moment, the former smuggler had unearthed yet another passion, another dream, that he'd kept locked deep in his mind and heart. Long before he'd joined the Jedi Order his only motivation for living only applied to four people – Mum, his three younger brothers, and his Mando savior. Now, though?

Perhaps Arctus should count himself lucky that the Sith he'd met on Corellia didn't force him into joining that accursed counterpart of the Jedi. Still, there was something about Coven that made the former smuggler see the Sith as a friend. The guy had been pretty creepy, sure, but he was also helpful. To think that a Sith would willingly help a lost bastard look for a Jedi...

The guy was bad news, but he was also Arctus's friend. Not close enough to earn his trust, sure, but a part of him hoped that the young Sith was still alive out there.

With his attention focused on the two Padawans, Arctus didn't see the arrival of another – a Twi'lek who headed straight for the snack table. He'd heard the choking sounds she made, though, prompting the oldest Padawan in the room to look at the source over his shoulder. Through the Force he sensed a spike of anxiety, and on (brotherly, protective) instinct Arctus gestured for Clove to follow if she wanted before walking towards the young Twi'lek.

Unlike Ruzaan who had immediately jumped to her aid, Arctus made use of his larger, broader frame to stand behind the Twi'lek, effectively blocking most of the party-goers' view of her as the Togruta made sure that she was alright. To make the action even more inconspicuous Arctus swiped a dessert plate and a fork from their respective stacks and proceeded to take a slice of Padawan Maiko's eye-catching fourteen-layered chocolate cake.

One slice secured, the former smuggler swiftly turned to face the other three, still hiding the female Twi'lek from plain view. Following Ruzaan's example, he gently smiled at her before showing her the slice of cake he now carried.

"Yeah, these sweets should all be charged with murder," he added jovially then gestured at the cake. "Just look at the layers on this thing! Maiko outdid himself... maybe we should put these bakers to trial because, darn, they're killing us with how good these treats are!"

As much as he wanted to ask her if she was alright, Arctus resisted the urge and simply watched as Ruzaan – and Clove, surely – looked out for the Twi'lek Padawan. She would speak to them in time, in her own terms, and the former smuggler would be more than willing enough to listen, much like he would do for Ruz and Clo.

@SlagathorTheUnknown @LilyNion @Xian

 

[Clove Vanhoop]

---

Clove's attention was shattered from the two Padawans ahead of her by the sudden choking sound, and her eyes frantically searched for the source. Then she discovered the source: the Twi'lek from earlier was choking on a cookie. Why was she choking so soon after her remark and Arctus' comforting headpat? Did she eavesdrop on them? Or perhaps, pure coincidence? Will of the Force?

No, it didn't matter why. The choking girl was all that mattered. With each hurried step closer, Clove's expression became more empty and distant, until all that remained was a smoothed-out mask. As a result of it, she appeared older and more focused, but also closed off. Ruzaan had already arrived when she and Arctus showed up, and had offered the blue-skinned girl a bottle of water. Clove, on the other hand, remained silent and observed the Twi'lek, checking how quickly and regularly she was breathing, how rapidly her eyes moved around, and how steady she was on her feet. Clove was ready to act.

Fortunately, the girl appeared to be fine. Except for a healthy dose of anxiety, which no one could blame her for, nothing appeared to be wrong. It took the voices of her two friends discussing the sweets for her to realize it was time to relax. And as quickly as any emotion from her face vanished, they reappeared, forming her lips and eyes into a warm and non-judgmental smile.

"Gee! You are right about that cake. Straight up a killer that one." She said in a higher pitch than usual to her tone, while her feet carried her to cake on the table. The cake that had been staring at her the entire night. This was her chance. 'Nonchalantly,' she grabbed her own slice, placed it on her dessert plate, and shifted onto the balls of her heels to face the trio of Padawans. "However, if it means eating it, I'd gladly be murdered!"

The half-Sephi chose to stand next to Arctus to give the Twi'lek some breathing room, and she took a far too large and eager bite out of her slice. "Mmmmm!" she mused, her eyes closed; the cake had been well worth the wait. Her eyes slowly reopened as a happy and content sigh rolled over her lips. Clove had almost completed her 'to-do list' for the evening; all that was left was for her to dance.

"Oh- I'm Clove!" She suddenly remembered introductions were a polite thing to do, especially when the situation involved three people encircling a stranger.

---

Tag @SlagathorTheUnknown @Forsythe Crowholde @Xian ​

(ooc note, I wrote this while half asleep. I'll correct any mistakes etc. tomorrow!)

 

[Xiann]

No sooner had the crumbs left the Twi’lek’s airway had an arm appeared before her with an offering of water. Her eyes followed the arm up to its owner as she gladly accepted the offering and took a large gulp, an unfamiliar Togruta face politely smiled back at her. “Thanks.” Her voice broke and cracked slightly, still recovering from the attack. The anxiety began to lift as she recovered.

That is, until she spotted the Togruta’s companions quick marching the few steps over to them, and surrounding her. For an instant the anxiety spiked, the blood rushed to her face turning it a shade of purple. She could feel her heartbeat rising, she was on the edge of full blown panic, then a magic word was said and everything stopped. The older of the Trio mentioned Maiko and all the memories of the young chef rolled through her head. They pushed out the anxiety and brought with them a calm she had long since forgotten. Also a little sadness, she hadn’t seen him in forever. She missed him.

Xiann straightened up and let the calm take over her and return to her relatively normal self. Though she still had some anxiety, it was under control. She took a quick sidestep as to not be in the middle of the group, instead forming the fourth edge of a circle, facing the others. She swirled the water in the bottle a bit before taking another gulp and selling the bottle.

A quick glance at the group she now found herself in gave her very little to go on. A Togruta with a battle scar. An extremely pretty Selphi girl, Xiann found her gaze rested on this one a little longer than the others before realising and smirk crossing her lips. ‘So that’s what that feels like.’ She moved her eyes to the third of the group older than the rest of them, she could tell from his quick thinking and stance he was like her, just with more experience. An interesting group to be sure.

The pretty Selphi introduced herself and it seemed only polite that the Twi’lek respond in kind, “I’m Xiann. And you’re right, if I'm to die by food, I wouldn’t be so upset if it was Maiko’s.” She raised the nearly empty bottle of water and shook it slightly at them, “Thanks for the help. I’m not quite used to being in public again yet.” She lowered her head slightly, but despite her efforts her eyes were constantly drawn back to Clove. It felt strange being on this end of the stick.

@SlagathorTheUnknown @Forsythe Crowholde @LilyNion

 

[Arctus Friers]

Ah, so the pretty Twi'lek knew Maiko, hm? Good. He'd use this to tease the kid when he came back from Kashyyyk.

Arctus let relief wash over him as he watched her compose herself, glad that he had mentioned someone she knew. It probably helped calm her from the anxiety she felt. The former smuggler tried to apologize for making her feel as if she'd been surrounded, but held the thought as she thanked them. The comment about not used to being public again raised some concerns but he wouldn't dare ask her so suddenly, even more so given the circumstance that she had just literally met all three of them.

"It's no problem, Xiann," he assured her with a warm smile, noticing how the Twi'lek's gaze seemed to be zeroing in on Clove. "So, we're all agreeing now that we should charge Maiko with three counts of murder, huh?" joked the former smuggler as he speared a piece of cake and took a bite. It was unbelievably good!

"Mmm, yep. Dude's guilty as Corellian hells. Damn, this cake is too good – hey, Ruzaan, you should really try this cake. You too, Xiann."

As he lifted the fork to take another bite of the cake, the long, jagged scar made by a crude knife would be visible for his fellow Padawans to see. With the sleeves of his light green dress shirt rolled up, they would be able to see that the scar ran the length of his right forearm. It was one of the souvenirs from one of the bad decisions he'd made in the past, and also a reminder that he wouldn't be alive today if it weren't for his Mando savior. Arctus remembered how Ruzaan seemed to be conscious about the battle scar he'd received on Felucia when they were on Bal'Demnic, and it prompted the former smuggler to offer some sort of solidarity by baring one of the many that littered his own body. As such, Arctus somehow extended the courtesy to Xiann, although he really didn't know how she got her own.

He hoped that he wouldn't offend her or anything by displaying one of his own scars.

"I'm Arctus, by the way. Nice to meet ya, Xi." Then, with a small self-conscious smile, he took back the nickname he'd uttered unconsciously and corrected himself. "Xiann, I mean."

@Xian @LilyNion @SlagathorTheUnknown

 

[Clove Vanhoop]

---

The two male Padawans around her were occasionally flashing their scars. She assumed they did it to make each other, and the beautiful Twi'lek, feel more at ease. But Clove would not have noticed the scars if they hadn't made each other aware of them in the first place. Despite lacking any scars herself, she had seen plenty of scars in her life, she even created a few of them herself thanks to surgeries! They were normal to her and a part of life. They signaled survival and recovery, not anything bad or shameful. So, just like before, she decided to continue ignoring their scars and focused back on her cake.

"Yups. We are charging him for first-degree murder. May the Force have mercy on my soul." She muttered while taking another big bite. So, much, chocolate! Really worth the chocolate breakout she'll face tomorrow.

The half-Sephi then suddenly looked up, the music had changed the slightest bit, but it was enough for her. Now was her time to dance. Properly dance. But wait— the cake. Ugh do I finish the cake first, or do I dance first and then eat the cake later... or do both at the same time... Clove bounced on the balls of her heels, unsure of what to do. It took her quite a few seconds to decide, but once she did, she shoved the last—far too large—bit of cake into her mouth and cleaned her lips with her fingertips. Great, it'd require even more uncomfortable hand rubbing to clean that!

Clove had finished munching on the cake and cleaned her hands as thoroughly as she could after a bit of awkward chewing and hand-rubbing. All while being completely oblivious to the fact that the Twi'lek's gaze was fixed on her the entire time.

"Let's go dancing!" She called out. Whether or not they were holding a slice of cake, Clove grabbed the wrists of the Jedi closest to her, Xiann and Arctus, and gestured for Ruzaan to join them as well. And with a bright smile on her lips, she dragged them to the dance floor, if they let her. "Come!"

---

Tag @SlagathorTheUnknown @Forsythe Crowholde @Xian ​

 

[Ruzaan Kai]

"Nice to meet you, Xiann" Ruzaan replied. The Twi'lek seemed to want to look embarrassed, but Ruzaan didn't miss that she kept eyeing Clove. Ruzaan couldn't blame her; Clove was as openly accepting as anyone he'd met before, and was the most likely to be a safe face to look at in an unfamiliar social setting.

The half-Sephi also had the presence of mind to change the situation from one where Xiann was uncomfortable to one where everyone was uncomfortable; the dance floor. Ruzaan dutifully followed his fellow padawans over to the designated dancing area and bopped along to the music, throwing a forlorn glance over his shoulder at the 14-layer cake as he did so. Maybe later...

At least he could more or less continue to get to know Clove and Xiann. "What did your journey look like to become a Jedi?" he asked them, making sure to glance over so to as include Arctus in the question.

@Xian @LilyNion @Forsythe Crowholde

 

[Xiann]

Xiann couldn’t help but smile as the others agreed to charge him with ‘Death by cooking’, “When I see him next, I’m sure I can come up with something to act as punishment for such heinous acts.” She took another mouthful of water, the soreness was almost gone now and she was feeling back to normal once more.

That was until a hand grabbed her wrist and began dragging her towards the dancefloor, “What? I- Ah~” She had no time to protest before they were at their destination. She couldn’t help but feel like this had happened before, not exactly like this, but similar. She half heartedly swayed and bounced to the music as her anxiety began to build. The Twi’lek knew that very few, if anyone, would be staring at her, but it felt like everyone was. Luckily the Togruta padawan struck up a conversation that she could latch onto for a distraction.

Xiann shrugged a little, “Oh you know, the usual.” In her time at the Temple she had come to realise that Jedi having ‘troubled’ pasts before joining was not an uncommon thing, “Grew up on the streets. Learned mechanics. Fixed things, broke things, joined a gang, shot things, fixed and broke more things, left the planet, came here, had some fun, did some missions and diplomacy, nearly got murdered by half a dozen sith, came back here, worked and trained in relative seclusion and, as I mentioned earlier, this is my first time in public again for a while.” She took a breath, realising that she just spurted that all out at high speed on a bunch of strangers and immediately became embarrassed again, “I mean…” She cleared her throat, “Stuff and things? What about you guys?”

@Forsythe Crowholde @LilyNion @SlagathorTheUnknown

 

[Arctus Friers]

Arctus couldn't stop the amused laughter that slipped past his lips when Clove began to lead him, Xiann, and Ruzaan towards the dance floor. He didn't realize that his own anxiety about being included had long since disappeared – did it diminish when Ruzaan made the former smuggler feel welcomed to the party? Did it slip out of his mind, unbidden, when he and the young Togruta approached Clove?

He honestly had no inkling, even more so now that they had included Xiann in their small circle. Had Arctus been aware of the change, he would have probably thanked the younger Padawans profusely, stammering along the way. He'd changed from the (falsely) self-assured smuggler into a Padawan who was always doubtful he'd ever fit in, but now...

"Hey, kiddo, wait–!" Arctus exclaimed in between laughter, sliding the dessert plate with the half-eaten slice of cake on the table before he could be fully dragged off to the dance floor. With a quiet promise to return to the unbelievably tasty cake, the former smuggler glanced at the small hand holding him by the wrist before letting himself feel slightly self-conscious now that their group now stood practically in the middle of the room.

He briefly wondered what kind of picture he painted at the moment – an old man bopping to the music with teenagers. He was sure that someone might take some kind of creepy context out of it, but Ruzaan's question had easily distracted Arctus from his negative thoughts. This time, however, he was a tad too late to stop the flinch from crossing his face when the Togruta included the older Padawan in the question.

Two pairs of red-gold eyes flashed in his mind, a pale woman and a tattooed man walking side by side on that planet Arctus initially sought sanctuary in. What he once thought was his intuition – the Force – screaming "Trouble!" at him, and at the same time the voice of his savior perverted by a Darkness he didn't yet have a name for.

The mood instantly shifted from joyous to scared, and the traits Arctus thought he had long shed when he joined the Jedi Order rearing their ugly heads all at once yet again.

Please don't ask me that. Not now, not out here in the open–

Nosy braaaaaaaaat, the hated voice of the Dark Side whispered faintly at him in a sibilant voice. Sssssssnap his neeeeeeeeeeck.

Arctus stopped dancing and just stood there, an awkward half-smile on his face. Hearing the word Sith from Xiann only added to the pressure, prompting the older Padawan to take a step back with a small shake of his head.

No, no, don't make a scene, not here, please, please, please–

You know who's at fault. Snap his neeeeeeeeeeck.

Touch them, you bastard, I dare you. I'd rather snap my own neck than hurt them–

Still with the awkward half-smile Arctus simply shut down, staring at his fellow Padawans and now unaware that he might have been making them uncomfortable.

@SlagathorTheUnknown @LilyNion @Xian

 

[Clove Vanhoop]

---

Clove's self-consciousness vanished the moment they stepped onto the dance floor. Dancing, like fashion, was one of the few ways she could express herself. Not to get attention, Force knows it was never about the attention. She did it for herself because it made her happy. And maybe, just maybe, it'll make someone else happy. It also reminded her of home, as the weekends were the only times she left the clinically clean structure to join the party-goers outside. As a result, unlike the other three Padawans, she became totally absorbed in the music and danced around the dance floor with the brightest smile. She wasn't the best; her movements were too graceful for party music, but she was passionate.

Ruz's words dragged her out of the music; he had asked yet another deep and intriguing question. Xiann had answered first and blurted out her entire life story, similar to Clove earlier tonight. The Twi'lek was a brave and strong young woman, and she couldn't help but admire it. Clove looked at her with appreciation, all the while continuing to dance to the beat of the music. "You seem to be very good at fixing things, don't you? I'm glad you made it back to us. We wouldn't have been able to meet at this party otherwise!" She said with a lighthearted smile, in an attempt to take away any awkwardness the Twi'lek might've felt.

Then she felt a shift, a mood that had changed. She looked around the group, perplexed, and found Arctus, who had stopped dancing and was staring at the three with a half-hearted smile.

He was the source of the change.

Something about his aura felt... gloomy. It was strange and concerning. Clove's dancing stalled as her gaze remained fixed on his. What was going through his head?

Without thinking, she broke the circle they were in and, if he let her, swung her arms around Arctus in a rather tight embrace. Or, to be more precise, she would have liked it to be tight, but with her strength, it was slightly tighter than usual. Regardless, she held him for a few seconds in silence, hoping it'd snap him out of his thoughts or at least comfort him. After, her head lifted up to give him a friendly smile, while her arms lowered to her sides. "Are you okay?" She spoke softly to him.

She nodded in response to his reaction, making a mental note to speak with him one-on-one later, and then, as if nothing had happened, she returned to her spot and continued her dancing. This time, she had a clearer goal in mind: to divert attention away from Arctus and allow him to recover from whatever he was going through. And, to that end, she decided to answer Ruz's question truthfully.

No time for shame, self-consciousness, or fear of being in the spotlight! It was life-story time. There'll be plenty of time for shame tomorrow morning.

"Well! I come from a family of doctors, as I said before. I grew up in a medical clinic that was built next to a tourist resort. There, I spent the majority of my time learning the art of medicine. You've heard the expression! It is best to begin when you are young. Or something like that. Anyway. The resort stopped luring tourists a few years ago, and my family's clinic shut down." She took a breather before laughing softly. Unlike most Jedi, she had no sob story. If anything, she was lucky to have a healthy family and a happy childhood; the closing of a clinic was her darkest moment. Then her fast rambling continued. "So we moved to a farm with my family to live out the rest of our lives in peace; I didn't like it, I felt useless, so they gave me some money and I explored the galaxy until I came across some Jedi, and here I am!"

"How about you, Ruzaan?"

---

Tag @SlagathorTheUnknown @Forsythe Crowholde @Xian ​

 

[Ruzaan Kai]

Ruzaan smiled in appreciation as Xiann shared her story. It was kind of a personal question, and Xiann's answer only made him want to get to know her better. She'd certainly had an exciting life- both before and during her time with the Order- and her talents with machines matched up nicely with one of his many blind spots. His astromech, R1-NT, had been helping him learn the ins and outs of various temple machines but he still didn't know a nut from a bolt.

As the focus shifted from Xiann to Arctus, so did the atmosphere. A shiver trickled down Ruzaan's spine as Arctus' mask slipped. Internally, Ruzaan cursed himself for bringing up the subject. Hadn't he asked a similar question the first day he'd met Arctus? The older padawan had nearly hit him with a shovel, and for a moment Ruzaan feared that he was about to figure out what "death by chocolate" meant.

Then Clove appeared, wrapping Arctus in a tight hug before sharing her story. Ruzaan watched in admiration as Clove let her earnestness and genuine excitement shine, burning through the pall that had settled over the group light a lighthouse through fog before passing him the baton.

Ruzaan smiled in embarrassment, the memory coming back to him. "Well, it's super rare for biological males in my species to demonstrate Force sensitivity" he said, "so I wasn't even tested until I... ah... showed aptitude. Have you ever heard of Sound Mimicry?" he asked the group. His face turned a little redder than normal as he committed to the story. "It's pretty much what it sounds like; you can use the Force to mimic sounds and even throw your voice." He plunged onward, feeling that the group needed a laugh; if it came at his expense, then so be it. "So the apex predator on Shili is something called an Akul- basically a Nexu but even more dangerous. And I demonstrated Sound Mimicry when I... uh... during an Akul attack, I lured it away by imitating its mating call."

@Forsythe Crowholde @Xian @LilyNion

 

[Xiann]

Xiann’s embarrassment slightly changed to concern when the eldest of the group seemed to freeze up and have a bit of a freak out over the current topic at hand. After the sort of things she had seen it wasn’t hard to believe that there were events in peoples that they ever wanted to talk about. She reached into her jacket's inner pocket and pulled out what appeared to be a very crude hip flask. It looked like it was made by folding scraps of durasteel into place and then welding them together. On the top was a large bolt welded down and the stopper was just a bolt that screwed into it.

She held it over Clove’s head as she pulled away, offering it to Arctus, “Here this will help. It’s…” She paused as she glanced at the two young looking padawans, “...tea. It will take the edge off. Don’t go nuts, it’s strong and I have a limited supply.” She would then turn her attention to Clove as she spoke. The Twi’lek realised she had probably never even met a Doctor that was on the up and up before she came to the temple. She grinned slightly as she thought about all the people feigning injuries just to see the ‘Beautiful Doctor’ and then miraculously feeling better.

Xiann let out a small chuckle as the thought was quickly followed by Ruzaan’s humorous story. He was clearly trying to lift the miasma that had befallen them with humour, hopefully it would work. “A mating call you say? Well truth be told, I have used mating calls to my advantage on a great number of occasions. They are very effective on humanoids as well as beasts it would seem. Though I do hope your call didn’t end the same way most of mine did.”

In that moment she felt her old self return for the first time in forever. She could feel herself filled with joy, confidence, humour and, of course, lust. She was her old self again, even if it was for only a short time. Perhaps this party wouldn’t turn out to be the horrible train wreck she thought it would for her.

@Forsythe Crowholde @LilyNion @SlagathorTheUnknown

 

[Ruzaan Kai]

Ruzaan blinked in surprise. He hadn't expected Xiann to also know about Sound Mimicry, and it was unique that they'd both utilized it for mating calls in the past. Perhaps they had more in common than he thought, but one of her comments mystified him.

"Well, mine ended with a very disappointed Akul some 500 meters in the wrong direction; pretty much the best result given the situation. How do your mating calls usually end?" he asked, genuinely curious. He heard Arctus inhale sharply next to him, but couldn't imagine why. Better to figure out what not to do if he ever had to try doing something like that again.

@LilyNion @Xian @Forsythe Crowholde

 

[Arctus Friers]

Any other person would find the offered comforts and distraction more than enough to snap them out of their internal doom and gloom. Any other person would smile, though with a hint of embarrassment, and express their gratitude at being surrounded by other sentients who knew how to recognize an incoming panic attack and how to direct the thoughts invested on said panic attack into something else. Any sane person would gratefully return Clove's comforting hug, appreciate Ruzaan recounting an anecdote even if he would be made fun for it, and accept the tea offered by Xiann.

They were looking out for him, trying to snap him out of the downward spiral of his thoughts, but the Darkness told Arctus that he didn't deserve it, that he was pathetically weak for being so wretchedly triggered by a perfectly harmless question.

Arctus was a pathetic, weak excuse of a man so he believed It. Beileved in the poison It currently planted in his mind.

Is that what you're going to tell these kids? That you became a Jedi because you're so afraid of turning into a Dark Sider, a Sith? You're gonna rain in on this party and burden them with that knowledge? Arctus! Truly, you are a delight!

Deaf to the conversation before him, the awkward, half-hearted smile on Arctus's face vanished completely and he took another step back, gently pushing the hip flask back in Xiann's hand. He opened his mouth to speak, to try and thank them for what they were doing, but nothing came out except for a quiet choke.

Ah, that takes us back to Malastare. Choking at the sight and feeling of power that was just within an arm's reach. And on Corellia, too. Instead you chose this rabble. That good for nothing Jedi Master who abandoned you in her grief. A Padawan brother, It scoffed as it referred to Drastus, voice growing louder the more Arctus listened, who despised even the sound of your voice and the sight of your shadow. And these children? One of them keeps on triggering you with those invasive questions to the point of shutting down. And you tell me they're worth keeping safe?

Hazel grey eyes shining with fear, Arctus shot Clove, Ruzaan, and Xiann an almosg mechanical look, one hand rising to gesture at one of the seats in the corner of the room.

"I... I-I don't feel s-so good," he stammered, slowly turning around and away from the trio. "I'll just... g-go and s-s-sit down for– for a moment. Sorry–"

Arctus nearly tripped on his own feet when he began to walk away.

One of the ceiling lights shattered in response to Arctus redirecting the fear and humiliation he felt away from the trio, especially Ruzaan who'd asked the question, the emotions lashing out through the Force. Thankfully no one except Arctus himself was underneath it, and he ended up with glass shards raining down on him.

Fuck.

A drop of red liquid dripped down the floor, followed by another. Lifting a hand to his left cheek, Arctus's breathing came out rapid, shallow, and short as he gazed at the blood on his fingers.

Fuck.

Without a word he turned around once more and headed straight for the door, confusion at how gentle he would push away any attempts at help that might surely come his way. The door to Drastus's dorm would slide open and as it slid shut Arctus would find himself leaning against the wall, breathing turning ragged as the Darkness laughed at him and mocked him.

Should anyone follow Arctus out of the dorm room, they would find the former smuggler leaning against the wall, head down and face covered with both hands and blood from the cut on his cheek trickling past his jaw and down his neck.

Spoiler: Spoiler: OOC

I rolled for how well Arctus would handle the Padawan Care Package offered by Ruz, Clo, and Xi. It didn't turn out good for my poor boy. A 3 out of 20. :'(

@SlagathorTheUnknown @LilyNion @Xian

 

[Clove Vanhoop]

---

Clove's gaze lingered on Arctus' face as the two younger Padawans chatted and joked. He wasn't getting any better. Then his smile faded, and she was certain it was only going to get worse. But she didn't know how to approach him. The hug had failed, Xi's obvious alcohol was denied, and Ruz's jokes were ignored.

It all happened so quickly; he turned pale in the face, stumbled away from them to the door, and the lamp above him snapped. A hail of glass rained down on the former smuggler, clearly landing in his skin. He then vanished.

Stunned she stared at the door as it closed. One second... two seconds... her arms and legs finally unfroze. Her body began to move again. They had to do something, right? Yes. Anything would've been better than standing still. "... We can't let him go like that, guys." That was all she said before rushing over to the front door.

She slowly opened the door and noticed Arctus standing against the wall. He looked like a broken and bleeding man. She approached him quietly and leaned against the wall next to him. Her thoughts raced; what would she say? What was she going to do to comfort him?

"You don't have to talk if you don't want to." She began, looked in his direction for a moment, and then continued. "My father used to look like you do right now. He always told me not to worry about it afterward, and for a long time, I believed him. But I could tell by the look in his eyes that whatever he was fighting... it wasn't going away. So my mother and I sat down with him and asked him what was going on. He initially denied it, but after a few more prods, he finally opened up. He shared his concerns and pains with us, and we were able to help him. And he felt a lot better knowing he didn't have to bear the burden alone."

Her big brown eyes returned to him, filled with worry and compassion, lacking any judgment or anger.

"I'm not sure why you're hiding what's going on. That's fine; despite feeling like I've known you all for years, we've only just met. I don't expect you to suddenly open up and tell us about your problems. But here's what I'm trying to say: I'm willing to listen, and I know the others are as well. Arctus, we're here for you."

Her gaze shifted away from Arctus, hoping to spot the other two Padawans nearby. And, if they were, she gave them a pleading look, hoping they'd say something comforting to help Arctus. Because she wasn't sure if her little monologue would do the trick.

"Also, your cheek is bleeding." She said with a more dry tone. "At the very least, let me help you with that."

---

Tag @SlagathorTheUnknown @Forsythe Crowholde @Xian ​

 

[Ruzaan Kai]

Any further talks of mating calls were shattered along with a light fixture as Arctus awkwardly excused himself and hurriedly exited the room, a storm brewing in his eyes. Ruzaan met Clove's eyes, seeing the battle play out; go after Arctus or give him space?

The half-Sephi only hesitated a few shocked moments before bolting off towards the door, leaving Ruzaan and Xiann standing on the dance floor. Ruzaan replayed the past few moments through his head; what was it that had set Arctus off like that? Finding no simple answers, he set about cleaning up the glass onto a paper plate and depositing the shards into a nearby mini gonk droid. This accomplished, the Togruta hurried out into the hallway just in time to catch a pleading look from Clove as she tried to convince Arctus to let them support him.

Ruzaan cleared his throat, mind racing; what to say that wouldn't just push Arctus further away? If only he could see himself the way that Ruzaan saw him; someone to be looked up to and admired for their courage and conviction. "Clove is right... we're here for you. This isn't just a fair-weather friendship. You don't have to tell us anything, but we are here if you want to talk. Talking makes things easier." he said, ignoring the nagging voice inside of him wondering why he didn't take his own advice. That could wait.

@Forsythe Crowholde @LilyNion @Xian

 

[Xiann]

Xiann turned back to Arctus and watched as head his panic attack and turned to leave, somehow smashing a light in doing so. She tucked the flask back into her inside pocket as the other two padawans seemed to freak out a little at the outburst. Clove worriedly rushing to see if he was alright and Ruz quickly cleaning the glass and following suit. Neither thinking that perhaps the man needed to be alone, at least for a minute or two, to calm and collect himself.

The Twi’lek shrugged to herself and calmly followed the trio, stopping off at the food table to grab a slice of cake and a fork, before heading out into the corridor too. There she found all three padawans in various emotional states that even someone without massive Force experience could read. Fear, anger, worry. Even she knew the Jedi didn’t like these sorts of uncontrolled emotions.

After the door had shut behind her, she tapped a few buttons on her wrist PDA and a distinct click could be heard on the door as it locked. The last thing they needed was some random to walk out and make the situation worse. Xiann leaned on the wall opposite the door and began to dig into the cake, only occasionally glancing over at the trio to see how things were progressing.

@Forsythe Crowholde @LilyNion @SlagathorTheUnknown

 

[Arctus Friers]

Arctus was aware that the more he questioned how he put a damper on the party with his pathetic display and lack of control, the more the poisoned voices in his head would use them against him. Despite said awareness, however, he couldn't help but agree with every accusation and insult the Dark Side threw at him. They were true and irrefutable, so why should he even try to deny them?

Just when he thought that he was doing so well, he would make a blunder himself and watch everything he'd work for fall down like a house of cards.

Still, there were so many reasons to try and compose himself. Arctus knew that he couldn't return to the party, not in this state, but it would be unfair for Clove, Ruzaan, and Xiann to leave them hanging without even a halfway decent explanation for his sudden change in behavior. He should probably glaze over why he had so many triggers, and make even a slight allusion to the Darkness that stubbornly clung to him. He was still too scared, too much of a coward – and maybe more insecure about how his fellow Padawans would look at him –to tell them what was ailing him. This was their first meeting, sans Ruzaan. And even then the young Togruta himself had no idea what was wrong with Arctus despite getting glimpses of the battle that raged within the older Padawan.

You should've hit the nosy one with that shovel way back then, said the Darkness almost cheerfully, voice always taunting, tempting, and condescending. Though, I know that you're always at fault. You're so easily triggered. You could've done so much better with Coven and the Sith.

Shut up.

You're a child. A foolish, pathetic, weak child. I've told you before what you're forsaking in exchange of being here, being healed. Healed of what, exactly?

Of you, argued Arctus, defiant and angry. You who constantly demean me, who always haunt me at my weakest – and even at my strongest. You who would hurt all the people I care for and love if I let you take over even for half a moment! I hate you, I hate that I'm afflicted by you, I hate myself for believing every insult you throw at me–

Aah, hatred. Are you so convinced that it is the only thing that you feel for me?

You're a coward, Arctus Friers. You're afraid of me more than you hate me.

It was an accusation he couldn't deny.

Clove's voice snapped Arctus out of the argument he had been engaged in with the voices, but he didn't dare uncover his face just yet. Instead the former smuggler listened to what the half-Sephi was saying, concern as clear as a cloudless sky on her face. Ruzaan agreed with Clove's offer of support. Even Xiann who opted to stay by Drastus's door glanced over the three of them over her slice of cake, the Twi'lek seemingly standing guard so no one else would accidentally walk out of the dorm room and see what was going on.

Arctus didn't deserve even a shred of their concern, but he was also a greedy bastard who wanted to deserve the kindness they were offering him.

You are many things, boy. None of them good.

The former smuggler slowly lowered his hands, the small smile on his face as dry as Clove's tone when she reminded him of the cut on his cheek. Unbeknownst to Arctus, a tinge of yellow touched his hazel grey eyes, a proof of the internal battle he knew he would never win tonight. Even the Darkness within him seemed to be slightly caught off guard by his admission, and simply went quiet instead of taking over.

"Thank you," he quietly told them. The former smuggler turned to face his fellow Padawans, the yellow in his irises slowly receding as the smile on his face turned a little more genuine. "And I'm sorry I rained down on the party. Troubled old man like me shouldn't have listened to Maiko telling me to make an attendance."

Self-deprecation was one of Arctus's strongest suits.

"As much as I want to tell you what I'm hiding, I..." he trailed off, looking to the side for a second, hands clenching and unclenching at his sides, "I can't burden you with it. It's already a burden Indy– my Master carries, and– and I told her it's probably for the best if Drastus and Felix don't find out yet. At least... At least not when I'm still at It's mercy."

And he knew it would be for these three's benefits to still be kept in the dark about the reasons why he was unstable. For now.

"I'm sorry you have to see a glimpse of how much of a fuck up I am."

The filter was off, and he honestly didn't know how if he could put it back on for the rest of the night.

@LilyNion @SlagathorTheUnknown @Xian