- Joined
- Aug 10, 2009
- Messages
- 2,528
- Reaction score
- 55
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transmission intercepted:
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Y
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“I am those who have spent too long staring into the abyss. It has seen us. We will hasten its coming. In the end, after it's all played out... Everything can only ever equal Nothing.”
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recording end:
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N
saving…
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transmission intercepted:
play? Y/N
Y
loading…
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“I am those who have spent too long staring into the abyss. It has seen us. We will hasten its coming. In the end, after it's all played out... Everything can only ever equal Nothing.”
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recording end:
delete? Y/N
N
saving…
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JEDI TEMPLE RECORD:
Jairo Light
[WARNING: person missing, presumed renegade. Following data is from last known meeting/predictions.]
Rank: Knight.
Master: Loz Yamarr [deceased]
Age: 32
Species: Human.
Description: Pale male, tall and slim. Grey eyes, blonde/brown hair, fond of dyes. Fond of black clothing.
Force Power Rating: Powerful.
Lightsaber style: Was taught Ataru, if renegade may be learning more destructive techniques. Appears to have learnt Jar Kai to advanced level.
Last sighted: Metellos, nine months ago.
Notes:
-Took the death of his master to renegade Vu’ll Krom badly, was made a knight by Yamarr on his deathbed. Developed several anger issues, probably due to his responsibilities pertaining to his knighthood without trial. Was eventually placed under temple arrest on psychological grounds. He escaped, leaving a message expressing his anger at being driven out of the Jedi order.
-Sighted on Correlia. A search of the immediate area found Vu’ll Krom’s body, naked and mutilated. Jairo escaped.
-Sighted on Naboo. Light was surrounded by corpses which he no doubt killed. A pair of jedi fought [anonymous for security], but he escaped, almost killing both. This indicates a growth in power.
-Sighted on Ilum. Master Haar and padawan attempted arrest. Light resisted, destroying many crystals and part of the cavern. Tracker was placed in Light's back, and lightsaber destroyed. Mentioned others like him, mentioned a brother.
-Sighted on Mustafar. Appears to have reforged his lightsaber. Knight Methoataske's second meeting with Light.
-Sighted on Metellos. Was confronted and stabbed by another, unnamed rogue Jedi. Fought Silver Moon along with Nuka Methoataske before being abducted by the unknown.
-SHOULD NOT BE CONFRONTED IF SIGHTED: This would just prove his misconception that he was driven out of the order. Should however be brought to Ossus for questioning.
WITNESS STATEMENT: PLANET: NABOO
“Well, they surrounded him, this tall man, and they were all trained enforcers, mind you sir, and they ordered him to stand down. He said something very quietly, that I couldn’t hear, but they obviously could, because they pulled their guns. Then quick as anything he’s pulled two of those laser sword things Jedi use, one a kind of orangey yellow, the other crimson. Anyway, he moved incredibly fast, he managed to cut down two before any had even opened fire. The other three started shooting, and his laser swords deflected some shots into the third man, but he was clipped himself, I think, because he staggered backwards, and shouted something. The other two thought they had him probably, because they went closer, but then he blasted one of them back somehow, without doing anything. That one hit a pillar, and landed funny, with his head at a funny angle. The last one ran, but got dragged back somehow. The man started to laugh, and for a second I swear I thought I saw lightning coming out of his hands, but I might have blinked. Well, the last enforcer was on the floor after that, and he sprinted off into the shadows. He was so fast…”
WITNESS STATEMENT: PLANET: KASHNIK
“You never go out on the water when the whales are around. Vast beats, the size of several large trawlers what won’t think twice about ripping you and your crew to shreds. Everyone I know has lost someone to them.
The warning had sounded ten minutes ago when I saw him. All the other boats were out of the water by then, their owners cowering on the shore. There was just one boat left, quite far out, certainly within the whales’ reach. It was just a small row-boat, the kind we build for our children to familiarize them with our way of life.
He was on it, this man in black robes. He was standing stock still, and at first I took this to be fear. The waters were perfectly calm, as they always are when the whales are beneath. I wanted to shout, to warn him, but I was overcome with the urge to be silent and watch.
Then I heard the singing. It obviously wasn’t him, the voices were collossal, but at the same time majestic, delicate and regal. It was the whales. No one had ever heard them singing before, but there are stories. They say they sing for those they pity.
The man just stood there, on his boat, surrounded by the gargantuans. I watched him for hours, others joined me when they saw him, or heard the singing. Then he picked up his oars, and rowed out further. We watched him until we could no longer, and then took to our boats ourselves. The singing had stopped.
We should have caught up with him. Our boats have engines, powerful engines, and he was in a child’s row-boat. We never found him, despite going as far out as we felt comfortable. We presumed him dead, we even held a small service for him. Your coming here gives us hope. What do you want with him?”
Jairo Light
[WARNING: person missing, presumed renegade. Following data is from last known meeting/predictions.]
Rank: Knight.
Master: Loz Yamarr [deceased]
Age: 32
Species: Human.
Description: Pale male, tall and slim. Grey eyes, blonde/brown hair, fond of dyes. Fond of black clothing.
Force Power Rating: Powerful.
Lightsaber style: Was taught Ataru, if renegade may be learning more destructive techniques. Appears to have learnt Jar Kai to advanced level.
Last sighted: Metellos, nine months ago.
Notes:
-Took the death of his master to renegade Vu’ll Krom badly, was made a knight by Yamarr on his deathbed. Developed several anger issues, probably due to his responsibilities pertaining to his knighthood without trial. Was eventually placed under temple arrest on psychological grounds. He escaped, leaving a message expressing his anger at being driven out of the Jedi order.
-Sighted on Correlia. A search of the immediate area found Vu’ll Krom’s body, naked and mutilated. Jairo escaped.
-Sighted on Naboo. Light was surrounded by corpses which he no doubt killed. A pair of jedi fought [anonymous for security], but he escaped, almost killing both. This indicates a growth in power.
-Sighted on Ilum. Master Haar and padawan attempted arrest. Light resisted, destroying many crystals and part of the cavern. Tracker was placed in Light's back, and lightsaber destroyed. Mentioned others like him, mentioned a brother.
-Sighted on Mustafar. Appears to have reforged his lightsaber. Knight Methoataske's second meeting with Light.
-Sighted on Metellos. Was confronted and stabbed by another, unnamed rogue Jedi. Fought Silver Moon along with Nuka Methoataske before being abducted by the unknown.
-SHOULD NOT BE CONFRONTED IF SIGHTED: This would just prove his misconception that he was driven out of the order. Should however be brought to Ossus for questioning.
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WITNESS STATEMENT: PLANET: NABOO
“Well, they surrounded him, this tall man, and they were all trained enforcers, mind you sir, and they ordered him to stand down. He said something very quietly, that I couldn’t hear, but they obviously could, because they pulled their guns. Then quick as anything he’s pulled two of those laser sword things Jedi use, one a kind of orangey yellow, the other crimson. Anyway, he moved incredibly fast, he managed to cut down two before any had even opened fire. The other three started shooting, and his laser swords deflected some shots into the third man, but he was clipped himself, I think, because he staggered backwards, and shouted something. The other two thought they had him probably, because they went closer, but then he blasted one of them back somehow, without doing anything. That one hit a pillar, and landed funny, with his head at a funny angle. The last one ran, but got dragged back somehow. The man started to laugh, and for a second I swear I thought I saw lightning coming out of his hands, but I might have blinked. Well, the last enforcer was on the floor after that, and he sprinted off into the shadows. He was so fast…”
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WITNESS STATEMENT: PLANET: KASHNIK
“You never go out on the water when the whales are around. Vast beats, the size of several large trawlers what won’t think twice about ripping you and your crew to shreds. Everyone I know has lost someone to them.
The warning had sounded ten minutes ago when I saw him. All the other boats were out of the water by then, their owners cowering on the shore. There was just one boat left, quite far out, certainly within the whales’ reach. It was just a small row-boat, the kind we build for our children to familiarize them with our way of life.
He was on it, this man in black robes. He was standing stock still, and at first I took this to be fear. The waters were perfectly calm, as they always are when the whales are beneath. I wanted to shout, to warn him, but I was overcome with the urge to be silent and watch.
Then I heard the singing. It obviously wasn’t him, the voices were collossal, but at the same time majestic, delicate and regal. It was the whales. No one had ever heard them singing before, but there are stories. They say they sing for those they pity.
The man just stood there, on his boat, surrounded by the gargantuans. I watched him for hours, others joined me when they saw him, or heard the singing. Then he picked up his oars, and rowed out further. We watched him until we could no longer, and then took to our boats ourselves. The singing had stopped.
We should have caught up with him. Our boats have engines, powerful engines, and he was in a child’s row-boat. We never found him, despite going as far out as we felt comfortable. We presumed him dead, we even held a small service for him. Your coming here gives us hope. What do you want with him?”
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PERSONAL LOG ENTRY: 17
I’ve just done something I don’t think I’ll ever be able to forgive myself for. I was tailing a group of criminals, on Naboo. They were dealing deathsticks, or something, I didn’t really take notice, I was just there on a whim.
Anyway, I followed one of them, he seemed to be some hired muscle, to this bar. I waited on a balcony outside for him to re-emerge, but I felt a Jedi’s presence in the same bar. The jedi soon emerged with an individual, I have no idea who they were, they may have been an informant if the Jedi were hunting me, which I highly suspect.
Then the merc came back out the bar, and almost spotted me, I have no idea how. He followed the Jedi. I followed him, and caught up with him at an alley, I think I stopped him from killing the Jedi, but the Jedi fled. I gave chase, using the rooftops. The assassin followed on a speeder bike.
There was some conversation, then I went back to the drugs compound. By this time I was slipping into a rage, I could feel it under my skin, itching to get out. I waited for a while, trying to subdue it, but failed. I went up to the director of the operation, and killed him. Then I did the same to the twenty or so workers below, I can’t remember the exact details, it’s a blur of emotion in my mind. That’s what I’m not going to be able to forgive.
After I did this, the Jedi turned up, and it appeared he had backup in the form of another. I fought them, still being angry. Eventually, the assassin turned up and helped me, something I’ve only ever had from one other individual in this galaxy.
The Jedi escaped, both of them. I spared one, the other beat the assassin and ran. I have no doubt that they will inform others of my wherabouts, so I need to get off Naboo. I’m thinking of going to see Khutarrah, its been too long and he’s my only friend. But more than that, I’ve been thinking. I havn’t put any of these thoughts into this log before, mainly because they were inconclusive.
Not any more. If I am to survive for much longer in this galaxy, I need family. I have Khutarrah, but one noghri, while formiddable, can be overcome. I will go to Nar Shaddaa, and will find others like me. People who feel the galaxy has wronged them, and that they deserve compensation. People who are alone, and need protection, who need help. That’s what a family’s for, right?
When the time comes, me and my new family will shake the foundations of the galaxy, and bring the current systems crashing down about the ears of their makers. We’ll reforge it, in time, into what we feel it should have been.
I’m going to talk to Khutarrah about it. Hopefully, I’ll lose any Jedi that are on my tail while I’m at it.
I’m worried. These slips are happening more and more. They scare me. If I don’t get some form of support soon, I fear I might turn completely. I don’t want that.
PERSONAL LOG ENTRY: 18
I’ve done it. I’ve built a family around me. My new family. Khutarrah helped me, as I thought he would. I’ve only recently come to realise quite how attached we are. He called me his brother, about a month ago now, but it stuck. I realise I mirror this sentiment. He acts as my conscience, I suppose, reminding me of the reasons I created the web when I’m in a rage, among other things.
We’ve set up a base on Rhen Var. In time, I hope we can expand it, its sparse at the moment. I plan to send a team to Saleucami soon, to meet up with an old aquaintance. Hopefully they’ll bring back a stockpile of reserve goods we can fall back on in a crisis.
Several people have asked for me to train them in the force. I have to stagger the lessons to keep in the loop with the other masters. It’s promising, but tiring. I’ve never used the force this much before; I think it’s strengthening me too.
As for the planet we’ve chosen as our home, it’s fascinating. I already knew about the vast caverns of hidden lore beneath the surface, but I hadn’t counted on the sheer remoteness of the place. I have a feeling that if anyone ever discovers that we are here, they’ll find it almost impossible to search the planet to find us. You get lost almost immediately here, it’s quite unnerving.
Finally, I have decided to attempt meeting with some other people. I have revealed us to one man, a mob boss named Alighieri. As far as I know, which is a lot in this field, the Ghosts don’t have anything against him, and so I’ll try to forge some form of alliance if I can. Of course, they’ll be held at arms length in reality, but thats just our nature.
PERSONAL LOG ENTRY: 19
I’ve come to realise recently, just how important a source of information and advice the halls below our base here really are. They are fascinating; I spend almost all my free time down there now. There are entire libraries devoted to the force, and I intend to read every book written about it.
I’ve already learned of several new ways of manipulating the force, but more than that I’ve changed my perspective of it just by reading these books. It’s not a tool, with set powers to be learnt and set limitations of what you can and cannot do using it. Instead, it’s an entity. An entity, which I fear, I’ve never quite understood before. With it, you can do almost anything if you set your mind to it. There are diagrams in one book of a man levitating, in another of someone bringing down an entire mountainside with its aid.
Of course, I’m bringing all the books that I feel are at my current skill level up to my quarters, and needless to say, they are getting rather packed. I’ll update once I’ve tried some of these powers. They are truly fascinating…
PERSONAL LOG: ENTRY: 20
It’s gone. Four weeks gone, in fact. Forgive me for not updating sooner, but I have been inconsolable, to say the least. I’m referring to the Web of Ghosts. Raiders, who wanted nothing more than profit, wiped out my fledgeling family. They left me for dead, with my books, which they thankfully deemed worthless. I have no idea who escaped alive, but I found several corpses.
I find it hard to put into words the emotions that I feel writing this. I truly believe that this was my last true hope of saving myself from eventual fall to the dark side. Perhaps I should travel to the Jedi and beg forgiveness. I don’t know anymore, my thoughts are more clouded than they were when I was a mere pawn of my emotions.
I need time.
PERSONAL LOG: ENTRY: 21
I’m traveling to Nar shadda. I managed to repair a radio, and hailed a merchant ship passing for Kuat. They’ve agreed to take me there, and from there I hope to acquire transport the rest of the way.
I hope to get my head cleared, at least in part, on Kuat. I don’t care if that means another rage, just so long as it numbs this pain. It’s unbearable; I’ve begun self-harming with a makeshift flail, which I rake across my back. One for each corpse I found, and ten for Khutarrah, whose fate I still know nothing of. It helps, in its own way.
I’m taking the books with me. They’ll make for good reading on Nar shadda, I hope I can transport them safely. I still have so much to learn from them. I’m growing in power as the days go on, I can feel it.
Not long until I leave, I’ll update once more before I do.
PERSONAL LOG: ENTRY: 22
I’m packed, the last thing to leave this rock for a long time, probably, will be a broken, depressed, homicidal, insane psychopath. I am what I am.
I had a revelation, this morning; the first since the incident. The Web may be dead, but I still live on. Its philosophies spawned from my own. I can still enact our final designs, and by doing so I hope I can vindicate at least part of this guilt and loss. I just need more power. I can do it alone.
This galaxy will burn for what it's done.
PERSONAL LOG: ENTRY: 23
Much has happnened since my last entry; my life has suddenly burst into activity. Khutarrah is alive, I stopped on the way to Nar Shaddaa on Kuat to resupply, and found a bounty hunter named Sahyk Wolrd. At first I fell into a rage at him. There was a tense situation, and I fear the stress tipped me over the edge once more. I killed three of his men, and ripped apart one of his yachts.
After I calmed down, he told me that he had been sent by Khutarrah to find me. You can imagine my joy… Or you could if you weren’t a book. We met him on Tatooine. We had much to discuss, and so we left for Nar Shaddaa; the only planet either of us own property on. I think back now at how lucky I have been to be reunited with my brother. Truly it was a reunion to be remembered, not that anyone but us will.
He told me how he escaped, and frankly it’s a brilliant tale. Ask him, if ever you get the chance. He told me that many of the raiders that destroyed our family still lived, and had hired bounty hunters to kill him. We have vowed to avenge our brethren Ghosts. They will rue that day.
However, while on the way to Nar Shaddaa, there was another twist in the tale. A death wave hit me through the force, powerful and dark. I know now that it was Belial who was the killer, but at the time I was most puzzled. I half slipped into my darker self, but managed to stop myself before I caused some irrepairable damage. I ripped the ship out of hyperspace through, without even thinking it. That was interesting.
I traced it to Dxun, and left Khutarrah once more. I had to figure out exactly what had happened, the force was commanding me to. I found a small group of four dark Jedi, like me, and a dead Bogan master assassin. I dueled one of them, a great albino devarionian. He quickly beat me, and offered me his tutelage. How could I refuse, when power is the one thing I require?
I learned their names: Valis (my master), Belial (A Kiffar with a taste for the theatrical), and Kai (Belial’s padawan). They were all good to me, and we left the planet together. It seemed the two masters had become friends, and so the padawan and I were dragged along also.
We headed for Myrkr, there to start something of our own, I believe. I was reminded of the Web when they explained it to me, and I was pleased. Once we arrived they almost immediately sent me out for lightsaber crystals. I assume they are for any others who we deem worthy… Regardless, the sent me to Ilum.
Here, something both fantastic and appalling happened. I collected up the crystals, and began the research I had planned. None of the crystals on Ilum are useful to me, it appears I am in search of more crystals like the one in Vu’ll Krom’s light saber. They are said to enhance force power, if this is true they will be a great asset to me; I just wish there was a way of using them without using the saber as well. Perhaps I will find one…
A pair of Jedi, a master and a padawan, appeared out of the snow. They challenged me, and my motives for being there, and I learned something very important; the Jedi no longer consider me one of them. My metamorphosis is complete it seems.
After a brief dialogue, I felt myself begin to slip. It was not as I usually do however, the evil came at me in one massive blast, and I released it as such. I managed to rip a chunk out of the very temple, but the Jedi were unharmed. I’m pleased that they were not killed, because the padawan then somehow managed to subdue my anger, my pain, and almost everything that my darker side draws upon. I know now that the deed was not permanent, but I am grateful, nonetheless.
The only problems the Jedi actually caused me were that they implanted some form of tracker into my back, and destroyed my lightsaber. Now my plans for a new one must come forward… I must concentrate on arming myself. I still have Vu’ll Krom’s, but I would rather not use it. Besides, I plan on creating a pair.
I gave a commlink to the padawan. Perhaps we’ll meet again someday, probably when they find out I’ve removed the tracker.
I’m on my way to Khutarrah now. It’s time to end the lives of those that ended the Web. I assume the padawan wouldn't be best pleased if she found out...
PERSONAL LOG: ENTRY: 24
Khutarrah is a knight, of what I have no idea but I knighted him nonetheless. He deserves it, he has grown powerful in the force. We traveled to Mustafar to complete his training with a trial, and I found one of my own while there.
The padawan Nuka is a padawan no more, it seems. She arrived shortly after we did, I had to think quickly to buy us enough time to finish Khutarrah's trial. I'm happy to say I did so without slipping into anger, I'm proud of myself for that. Despite her arrival (with a brood of her own padawans I must add), we managed to find enough "unsupervised" time to complete Brother's training, and to forge my new weapons.
They really are works of art. I am delighted with them, and rightly so. I killed stars for the crystals, stole from scientists and researchers for the hilts and focussing rings, and took inspiration from an ancient way of combat for the design. They are superior in almost every way to the average lightsaber; the hilts are resistant to lightsaber strikes (I have tested myself), the crystals (Qixoni, I'm told) greatly enhance my force abilities, and the twin blades can clip together to form a saberstaff, which I am well on the way to mastering. These blood-red blades of mine are treasures indeed.
I have become distracted from the main reason I chose to update now. I swore an oath, a solemn oath. I did it in front of Khutarrah, and I know full well how he takes such things. I swore to never again kill an innocent needlessly. I have been meaning to curb this habit for quite some time, so when Nuka demanded this of me I readily accepted. In return I have earned her allegiance, or so she says.
I pity her; she told me on Mustafar just how little she trusts the very order she fights for. She told me how she is friendless because of this, how she's treated as an oddball, excluded to some extent. I hope she realises that not trusting the order doesn't mean that she cannot make friendships outside it, not even I am truly friendless, I have Sahyk and Khutarrah. I don't think anyone can live for long being truly alone, and I speak from experience.
Speaking of experience, the Web is avenged at last. Khutarrah and I ripped apart those who had wronged us so in a bloody retribution. It felt good, it has subdued my darker self for now, satisfied its bloodlust. I hasten to add that I did this before I took my oath, although the pathetic wretches we killed were hardly innocent. I have no regrets over their deaths.
Recently I have felt lighter, I think this is a good sign. Hopefully I will remain so for quite some time.
PERSONAL LOG: ENTRY: 25
Again I have been remiss in updating you. I'd apologise, but for the revelations shaking the foundations of my world at the moment. I have a daughter now, an Anzati girl more beautiful than any other I have ever seen... And that's just when she has her mask on. I am training her in the art of deception, she will be a master before I send her to do the deeds I have set out for her. She will need to be to deceive the masters of deception themselves.
I have also learned that Belial has secrets he would like to keep from me, despite what he has previously said. All he has done in enflamed my curiosity, I will find out what he has been up to... I must. The Kiffar likes to think he is so very mysterious, perhaps he doesn't realise how much he gives away when he speaks, or thinks, or even dreams? I am so receptive... Perhaps he knows. We parted ways, when we returned to Necropolis for some motive of his. That planet fears me so, I sometimes wonder if they'll ever develop the guts to take me on. I doubt it, they seem like a crushed people. Not my fault, you understand, when you live amongst the dead for as long as they have you're bound to feel dead inside yourself. I admit, my presence may not have helped.
I've been meaning to visit Khutarrah. I tried recently, but I was ambushed by someone who calls himself Ledo. The name is a fake, of that I am certain, but that wasn't what disconcerted me. He believed what I used to: that all must die in this galaxy, and that the way to accomplish this was by the edge of his blade. The fool. He's yet to reach the level of understanding I myself am on, although I will avoid telling him it in such a blunt manner as that. He's powerful, a dangerous adversary should it come to it. I don't think it will. I think he'll come round to my beliefs soon enough. I think I have found myself another ally.
It's funny really, that when I followed a walk of life that would have set me back on the straight and narrow the galaxy deserted me, left me for dead alone and cold. It betrays its true nature, that not of unfeeling statistics and chance, but of willful sadistic cruelty aimed at those most vulnerable. I won't let it hurt any others, I promise. Especially now, now that I walk an entirely different path, now that I walk the road of vengeance, fire and Nothing. The galaxy has armed me to defend against those who would see me fail, the doubters and the cynics, the activists of other beliefs... The galaxy is arming me with the weapons I need to complete my mission. It has given me friends, comrades, resources and information. I will exploit them all. Failure is unacceptable.
PERSONAL LOG: ENTRY: 26
I don't sleep anymore, I just meditate. I have such dreams, such horrific nightmares that I can't bare to lie there and witness them night after night, rolling back and forth through my mind like the tides of some loathsome ocean. I have killed so many people, hundreds of nameless faces that seem to merge into one grotesque blanket of guilt. I disgust even myself, sometimes.
There was this one particular kill, a dark Kel Dor that I never caught the name of before slaughtering. I plastered his innards across a cave on Anzat, and made a tomb for him from it by collapsing the cursed place around his corpse. He was a murderer, I was right to destroy him...
I still can't shake this feeling of self hate. Perhaps I'm just brooding because I haven't had a good testing of my strengths lately, I'm confused because I'm not having to work to stay alive. I'll seek out Ledo, that will take my mind off such trivial things as damnation while my plans reach fruition.
PERSONAL LOGS: ENTRIES: 27 - 38
He’s… Gone. Just like that… Gone. I’ll probably never know why… But I want to. How? Where? I could follow the death-scream to its source but I can’t be sure of my safety if he died of something other than suicide. I don’t know what to do. I’m aimless…
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HOW DARE HE DIE? THIS IS UTTERLY TYPICAL OF SUCH A THEATRICAL SHIT! I TOLD HIM I SHOULD GO WITH HIM, I DAMN NEAR BEGGED HIM TO LET ME ACCOMPANY HIM BUT HE REFUSED AND NOW HE’S DEAD. HE’S LEFT ME ALONE, JUST LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I’VE EVER KNOWN!
I HATE YOU BELIAL. I HOPE IT HURT.
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That’s the last time I lose control of myself and rant into a machine. It’s unseemly. I can harness my anger when I’m fighting, I can harness it now. This is just another fight, and I intend to win. I just wish I knew what I was fighting… Am I my own enemy? I am normally…
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I suppose it’s good that he’s dead in a way. He – what am I saying, it’s awful. I LOVE YOU BELIAL, WHY? WHY?
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I could kill myself… Then I could be with him again, and no-one could take that away. I could confess all the naughty things I did when he wasn’t around, and he’d forgive me, and we could be together for eternity.
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How could I have contemplated suicide? I’m not a coward… I don’t think… Belial would know. He’d flick a little card at me and smile and make everything better… He always knew what to say to make me feel good. I need him back, perhaps there’s some way of ressurecting the dead? I know he managed it with Dekker…
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I never did find out what actually happened back on Metellos when Nuka stabbed me. Perhaps I should have… I might have found a way to aleviate this gnawing loss. It’s like withdrawal symptoms, only – oh… Who the **** is going to listen to these tapes anyway? Who even cares about demented freaks like me?
Belial did.
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I’ve started going to the theatre because it reminds me of Belial the way he used to swirl his cloak and had that air of mystery and guile I could never quite get enough of he bewitched me and I need my Belial back-
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The Temptations of Perses is good. The Titan God of Destruction seems a fitting deity for me to admire, although I can’t quite remember why. I’m sure it’ll come back to me, like Belial won’t.
COME BACK! PLEASE! LET US VISIT THE THEATRE TOGETHER! IT’LL BE FUN!
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Oh… Yes. I promised not to rant, apologies. I’ve been thinking again lately of Belial, which seems to be a recurring theme these last few months. I remembered his ambition to obtain Omnipotence, and realised I would have had to kill him anyway in the end. This has saved me the effort.
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My purpose is returning to me. I have decided not to return to my path until these feelings of loss and frustration have been mastered. A few more weeks, perhaps… Belial must not haunt me for much longer. I owe the galaxy that, at least.
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Nothing has returned. Woe to you, universe. Woe to you.
I’ve just done something I don’t think I’ll ever be able to forgive myself for. I was tailing a group of criminals, on Naboo. They were dealing deathsticks, or something, I didn’t really take notice, I was just there on a whim.
Anyway, I followed one of them, he seemed to be some hired muscle, to this bar. I waited on a balcony outside for him to re-emerge, but I felt a Jedi’s presence in the same bar. The jedi soon emerged with an individual, I have no idea who they were, they may have been an informant if the Jedi were hunting me, which I highly suspect.
Then the merc came back out the bar, and almost spotted me, I have no idea how. He followed the Jedi. I followed him, and caught up with him at an alley, I think I stopped him from killing the Jedi, but the Jedi fled. I gave chase, using the rooftops. The assassin followed on a speeder bike.
There was some conversation, then I went back to the drugs compound. By this time I was slipping into a rage, I could feel it under my skin, itching to get out. I waited for a while, trying to subdue it, but failed. I went up to the director of the operation, and killed him. Then I did the same to the twenty or so workers below, I can’t remember the exact details, it’s a blur of emotion in my mind. That’s what I’m not going to be able to forgive.
After I did this, the Jedi turned up, and it appeared he had backup in the form of another. I fought them, still being angry. Eventually, the assassin turned up and helped me, something I’ve only ever had from one other individual in this galaxy.
The Jedi escaped, both of them. I spared one, the other beat the assassin and ran. I have no doubt that they will inform others of my wherabouts, so I need to get off Naboo. I’m thinking of going to see Khutarrah, its been too long and he’s my only friend. But more than that, I’ve been thinking. I havn’t put any of these thoughts into this log before, mainly because they were inconclusive.
Not any more. If I am to survive for much longer in this galaxy, I need family. I have Khutarrah, but one noghri, while formiddable, can be overcome. I will go to Nar Shaddaa, and will find others like me. People who feel the galaxy has wronged them, and that they deserve compensation. People who are alone, and need protection, who need help. That’s what a family’s for, right?
When the time comes, me and my new family will shake the foundations of the galaxy, and bring the current systems crashing down about the ears of their makers. We’ll reforge it, in time, into what we feel it should have been.
I’m going to talk to Khutarrah about it. Hopefully, I’ll lose any Jedi that are on my tail while I’m at it.
I’m worried. These slips are happening more and more. They scare me. If I don’t get some form of support soon, I fear I might turn completely. I don’t want that.
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PERSONAL LOG ENTRY: 18
I’ve done it. I’ve built a family around me. My new family. Khutarrah helped me, as I thought he would. I’ve only recently come to realise quite how attached we are. He called me his brother, about a month ago now, but it stuck. I realise I mirror this sentiment. He acts as my conscience, I suppose, reminding me of the reasons I created the web when I’m in a rage, among other things.
We’ve set up a base on Rhen Var. In time, I hope we can expand it, its sparse at the moment. I plan to send a team to Saleucami soon, to meet up with an old aquaintance. Hopefully they’ll bring back a stockpile of reserve goods we can fall back on in a crisis.
Several people have asked for me to train them in the force. I have to stagger the lessons to keep in the loop with the other masters. It’s promising, but tiring. I’ve never used the force this much before; I think it’s strengthening me too.
As for the planet we’ve chosen as our home, it’s fascinating. I already knew about the vast caverns of hidden lore beneath the surface, but I hadn’t counted on the sheer remoteness of the place. I have a feeling that if anyone ever discovers that we are here, they’ll find it almost impossible to search the planet to find us. You get lost almost immediately here, it’s quite unnerving.
Finally, I have decided to attempt meeting with some other people. I have revealed us to one man, a mob boss named Alighieri. As far as I know, which is a lot in this field, the Ghosts don’t have anything against him, and so I’ll try to forge some form of alliance if I can. Of course, they’ll be held at arms length in reality, but thats just our nature.
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PERSONAL LOG ENTRY: 19
I’ve come to realise recently, just how important a source of information and advice the halls below our base here really are. They are fascinating; I spend almost all my free time down there now. There are entire libraries devoted to the force, and I intend to read every book written about it.
I’ve already learned of several new ways of manipulating the force, but more than that I’ve changed my perspective of it just by reading these books. It’s not a tool, with set powers to be learnt and set limitations of what you can and cannot do using it. Instead, it’s an entity. An entity, which I fear, I’ve never quite understood before. With it, you can do almost anything if you set your mind to it. There are diagrams in one book of a man levitating, in another of someone bringing down an entire mountainside with its aid.
Of course, I’m bringing all the books that I feel are at my current skill level up to my quarters, and needless to say, they are getting rather packed. I’ll update once I’ve tried some of these powers. They are truly fascinating…
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PERSONAL LOG: ENTRY: 20
It’s gone. Four weeks gone, in fact. Forgive me for not updating sooner, but I have been inconsolable, to say the least. I’m referring to the Web of Ghosts. Raiders, who wanted nothing more than profit, wiped out my fledgeling family. They left me for dead, with my books, which they thankfully deemed worthless. I have no idea who escaped alive, but I found several corpses.
I find it hard to put into words the emotions that I feel writing this. I truly believe that this was my last true hope of saving myself from eventual fall to the dark side. Perhaps I should travel to the Jedi and beg forgiveness. I don’t know anymore, my thoughts are more clouded than they were when I was a mere pawn of my emotions.
I need time.
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PERSONAL LOG: ENTRY: 21
I’m traveling to Nar shadda. I managed to repair a radio, and hailed a merchant ship passing for Kuat. They’ve agreed to take me there, and from there I hope to acquire transport the rest of the way.
I hope to get my head cleared, at least in part, on Kuat. I don’t care if that means another rage, just so long as it numbs this pain. It’s unbearable; I’ve begun self-harming with a makeshift flail, which I rake across my back. One for each corpse I found, and ten for Khutarrah, whose fate I still know nothing of. It helps, in its own way.
I’m taking the books with me. They’ll make for good reading on Nar shadda, I hope I can transport them safely. I still have so much to learn from them. I’m growing in power as the days go on, I can feel it.
Not long until I leave, I’ll update once more before I do.
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PERSONAL LOG: ENTRY: 22
I’m packed, the last thing to leave this rock for a long time, probably, will be a broken, depressed, homicidal, insane psychopath. I am what I am.
I had a revelation, this morning; the first since the incident. The Web may be dead, but I still live on. Its philosophies spawned from my own. I can still enact our final designs, and by doing so I hope I can vindicate at least part of this guilt and loss. I just need more power. I can do it alone.
This galaxy will burn for what it's done.
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PERSONAL LOG: ENTRY: 23
Much has happnened since my last entry; my life has suddenly burst into activity. Khutarrah is alive, I stopped on the way to Nar Shaddaa on Kuat to resupply, and found a bounty hunter named Sahyk Wolrd. At first I fell into a rage at him. There was a tense situation, and I fear the stress tipped me over the edge once more. I killed three of his men, and ripped apart one of his yachts.
After I calmed down, he told me that he had been sent by Khutarrah to find me. You can imagine my joy… Or you could if you weren’t a book. We met him on Tatooine. We had much to discuss, and so we left for Nar Shaddaa; the only planet either of us own property on. I think back now at how lucky I have been to be reunited with my brother. Truly it was a reunion to be remembered, not that anyone but us will.
He told me how he escaped, and frankly it’s a brilliant tale. Ask him, if ever you get the chance. He told me that many of the raiders that destroyed our family still lived, and had hired bounty hunters to kill him. We have vowed to avenge our brethren Ghosts. They will rue that day.
However, while on the way to Nar Shaddaa, there was another twist in the tale. A death wave hit me through the force, powerful and dark. I know now that it was Belial who was the killer, but at the time I was most puzzled. I half slipped into my darker self, but managed to stop myself before I caused some irrepairable damage. I ripped the ship out of hyperspace through, without even thinking it. That was interesting.
I traced it to Dxun, and left Khutarrah once more. I had to figure out exactly what had happened, the force was commanding me to. I found a small group of four dark Jedi, like me, and a dead Bogan master assassin. I dueled one of them, a great albino devarionian. He quickly beat me, and offered me his tutelage. How could I refuse, when power is the one thing I require?
I learned their names: Valis (my master), Belial (A Kiffar with a taste for the theatrical), and Kai (Belial’s padawan). They were all good to me, and we left the planet together. It seemed the two masters had become friends, and so the padawan and I were dragged along also.
We headed for Myrkr, there to start something of our own, I believe. I was reminded of the Web when they explained it to me, and I was pleased. Once we arrived they almost immediately sent me out for lightsaber crystals. I assume they are for any others who we deem worthy… Regardless, the sent me to Ilum.
Here, something both fantastic and appalling happened. I collected up the crystals, and began the research I had planned. None of the crystals on Ilum are useful to me, it appears I am in search of more crystals like the one in Vu’ll Krom’s light saber. They are said to enhance force power, if this is true they will be a great asset to me; I just wish there was a way of using them without using the saber as well. Perhaps I will find one…
A pair of Jedi, a master and a padawan, appeared out of the snow. They challenged me, and my motives for being there, and I learned something very important; the Jedi no longer consider me one of them. My metamorphosis is complete it seems.
After a brief dialogue, I felt myself begin to slip. It was not as I usually do however, the evil came at me in one massive blast, and I released it as such. I managed to rip a chunk out of the very temple, but the Jedi were unharmed. I’m pleased that they were not killed, because the padawan then somehow managed to subdue my anger, my pain, and almost everything that my darker side draws upon. I know now that the deed was not permanent, but I am grateful, nonetheless.
The only problems the Jedi actually caused me were that they implanted some form of tracker into my back, and destroyed my lightsaber. Now my plans for a new one must come forward… I must concentrate on arming myself. I still have Vu’ll Krom’s, but I would rather not use it. Besides, I plan on creating a pair.
I gave a commlink to the padawan. Perhaps we’ll meet again someday, probably when they find out I’ve removed the tracker.
I’m on my way to Khutarrah now. It’s time to end the lives of those that ended the Web. I assume the padawan wouldn't be best pleased if she found out...
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PERSONAL LOG: ENTRY: 24
Khutarrah is a knight, of what I have no idea but I knighted him nonetheless. He deserves it, he has grown powerful in the force. We traveled to Mustafar to complete his training with a trial, and I found one of my own while there.
The padawan Nuka is a padawan no more, it seems. She arrived shortly after we did, I had to think quickly to buy us enough time to finish Khutarrah's trial. I'm happy to say I did so without slipping into anger, I'm proud of myself for that. Despite her arrival (with a brood of her own padawans I must add), we managed to find enough "unsupervised" time to complete Brother's training, and to forge my new weapons.
They really are works of art. I am delighted with them, and rightly so. I killed stars for the crystals, stole from scientists and researchers for the hilts and focussing rings, and took inspiration from an ancient way of combat for the design. They are superior in almost every way to the average lightsaber; the hilts are resistant to lightsaber strikes (I have tested myself), the crystals (Qixoni, I'm told) greatly enhance my force abilities, and the twin blades can clip together to form a saberstaff, which I am well on the way to mastering. These blood-red blades of mine are treasures indeed.
I have become distracted from the main reason I chose to update now. I swore an oath, a solemn oath. I did it in front of Khutarrah, and I know full well how he takes such things. I swore to never again kill an innocent needlessly. I have been meaning to curb this habit for quite some time, so when Nuka demanded this of me I readily accepted. In return I have earned her allegiance, or so she says.
I pity her; she told me on Mustafar just how little she trusts the very order she fights for. She told me how she is friendless because of this, how she's treated as an oddball, excluded to some extent. I hope she realises that not trusting the order doesn't mean that she cannot make friendships outside it, not even I am truly friendless, I have Sahyk and Khutarrah. I don't think anyone can live for long being truly alone, and I speak from experience.
Speaking of experience, the Web is avenged at last. Khutarrah and I ripped apart those who had wronged us so in a bloody retribution. It felt good, it has subdued my darker self for now, satisfied its bloodlust. I hasten to add that I did this before I took my oath, although the pathetic wretches we killed were hardly innocent. I have no regrets over their deaths.
Recently I have felt lighter, I think this is a good sign. Hopefully I will remain so for quite some time.
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PERSONAL LOG: ENTRY: 25
Again I have been remiss in updating you. I'd apologise, but for the revelations shaking the foundations of my world at the moment. I have a daughter now, an Anzati girl more beautiful than any other I have ever seen... And that's just when she has her mask on. I am training her in the art of deception, she will be a master before I send her to do the deeds I have set out for her. She will need to be to deceive the masters of deception themselves.
I have also learned that Belial has secrets he would like to keep from me, despite what he has previously said. All he has done in enflamed my curiosity, I will find out what he has been up to... I must. The Kiffar likes to think he is so very mysterious, perhaps he doesn't realise how much he gives away when he speaks, or thinks, or even dreams? I am so receptive... Perhaps he knows. We parted ways, when we returned to Necropolis for some motive of his. That planet fears me so, I sometimes wonder if they'll ever develop the guts to take me on. I doubt it, they seem like a crushed people. Not my fault, you understand, when you live amongst the dead for as long as they have you're bound to feel dead inside yourself. I admit, my presence may not have helped.
I've been meaning to visit Khutarrah. I tried recently, but I was ambushed by someone who calls himself Ledo. The name is a fake, of that I am certain, but that wasn't what disconcerted me. He believed what I used to: that all must die in this galaxy, and that the way to accomplish this was by the edge of his blade. The fool. He's yet to reach the level of understanding I myself am on, although I will avoid telling him it in such a blunt manner as that. He's powerful, a dangerous adversary should it come to it. I don't think it will. I think he'll come round to my beliefs soon enough. I think I have found myself another ally.
It's funny really, that when I followed a walk of life that would have set me back on the straight and narrow the galaxy deserted me, left me for dead alone and cold. It betrays its true nature, that not of unfeeling statistics and chance, but of willful sadistic cruelty aimed at those most vulnerable. I won't let it hurt any others, I promise. Especially now, now that I walk an entirely different path, now that I walk the road of vengeance, fire and Nothing. The galaxy has armed me to defend against those who would see me fail, the doubters and the cynics, the activists of other beliefs... The galaxy is arming me with the weapons I need to complete my mission. It has given me friends, comrades, resources and information. I will exploit them all. Failure is unacceptable.
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PERSONAL LOG: ENTRY: 26
I don't sleep anymore, I just meditate. I have such dreams, such horrific nightmares that I can't bare to lie there and witness them night after night, rolling back and forth through my mind like the tides of some loathsome ocean. I have killed so many people, hundreds of nameless faces that seem to merge into one grotesque blanket of guilt. I disgust even myself, sometimes.
There was this one particular kill, a dark Kel Dor that I never caught the name of before slaughtering. I plastered his innards across a cave on Anzat, and made a tomb for him from it by collapsing the cursed place around his corpse. He was a murderer, I was right to destroy him...
I still can't shake this feeling of self hate. Perhaps I'm just brooding because I haven't had a good testing of my strengths lately, I'm confused because I'm not having to work to stay alive. I'll seek out Ledo, that will take my mind off such trivial things as damnation while my plans reach fruition.
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PERSONAL LOGS: ENTRIES: 27 - 38
He’s… Gone. Just like that… Gone. I’ll probably never know why… But I want to. How? Where? I could follow the death-scream to its source but I can’t be sure of my safety if he died of something other than suicide. I don’t know what to do. I’m aimless…
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HOW DARE HE DIE? THIS IS UTTERLY TYPICAL OF SUCH A THEATRICAL SHIT! I TOLD HIM I SHOULD GO WITH HIM, I DAMN NEAR BEGGED HIM TO LET ME ACCOMPANY HIM BUT HE REFUSED AND NOW HE’S DEAD. HE’S LEFT ME ALONE, JUST LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I’VE EVER KNOWN!
I HATE YOU BELIAL. I HOPE IT HURT.
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That’s the last time I lose control of myself and rant into a machine. It’s unseemly. I can harness my anger when I’m fighting, I can harness it now. This is just another fight, and I intend to win. I just wish I knew what I was fighting… Am I my own enemy? I am normally…
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I suppose it’s good that he’s dead in a way. He – what am I saying, it’s awful. I LOVE YOU BELIAL, WHY? WHY?
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I could kill myself… Then I could be with him again, and no-one could take that away. I could confess all the naughty things I did when he wasn’t around, and he’d forgive me, and we could be together for eternity.
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How could I have contemplated suicide? I’m not a coward… I don’t think… Belial would know. He’d flick a little card at me and smile and make everything better… He always knew what to say to make me feel good. I need him back, perhaps there’s some way of ressurecting the dead? I know he managed it with Dekker…
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I never did find out what actually happened back on Metellos when Nuka stabbed me. Perhaps I should have… I might have found a way to aleviate this gnawing loss. It’s like withdrawal symptoms, only – oh… Who the **** is going to listen to these tapes anyway? Who even cares about demented freaks like me?
Belial did.
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I’ve started going to the theatre because it reminds me of Belial the way he used to swirl his cloak and had that air of mystery and guile I could never quite get enough of he bewitched me and I need my Belial back-
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The Temptations of Perses is good. The Titan God of Destruction seems a fitting deity for me to admire, although I can’t quite remember why. I’m sure it’ll come back to me, like Belial won’t.
COME BACK! PLEASE! LET US VISIT THE THEATRE TOGETHER! IT’LL BE FUN!
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Oh… Yes. I promised not to rant, apologies. I’ve been thinking again lately of Belial, which seems to be a recurring theme these last few months. I remembered his ambition to obtain Omnipotence, and realised I would have had to kill him anyway in the end. This has saved me the effort.
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My purpose is returning to me. I have decided not to return to my path until these feelings of loss and frustration have been mastered. A few more weeks, perhaps… Belial must not haunt me for much longer. I owe the galaxy that, at least.
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Nothing has returned. Woe to you, universe. Woe to you.
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Roleplays:
The Debut
All's fair in drugs and war...
Family
A web is woven.
The Puppeteer And The Shadow.
Two Old Friends...
DAYBREAK
Loss and Regain
Unrelenting Troubles.
A Reunion of Brothers.
Paradise Lost.
Back to the Future IV
Equal Exchange
Crystal Hunters (Jedi mission).
Ghosts Avenged.
Hunting Down the Light.
Time of the Grey
A Little Light Business...
The City in the Sky.
Death Do Us Part, the Bloody Planet of Anzat.
A Trip Through Your Telescope Eyes.
Light's Distance, Shade's calling.
Episodes of the facade.
Vampire's Gift.
Can You Hear my Statues' Screaming?
OOC NOTE: Ignore the bit saying he's knight level, he's far more powerful than that. That bit's only there to show he was a knight when he left the Jedi.
The Debut
All's fair in drugs and war...
Family
A web is woven.
The Puppeteer And The Shadow.
Two Old Friends...
DAYBREAK
Loss and Regain
Unrelenting Troubles.
A Reunion of Brothers.
Paradise Lost.
Back to the Future IV
Equal Exchange
Crystal Hunters (Jedi mission).
Ghosts Avenged.
Hunting Down the Light.
Time of the Grey
A Little Light Business...
The City in the Sky.
Death Do Us Part, the Bloody Planet of Anzat.
A Trip Through Your Telescope Eyes.
Light's Distance, Shade's calling.
Episodes of the facade.
Vampire's Gift.
Can You Hear my Statues' Screaming?
OOC NOTE: Ignore the bit saying he's knight level, he's far more powerful than that. That bit's only there to show he was a knight when he left the Jedi.
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