Sangilak Tapeesa

Sarah

Member
SWRP Writer
Joined
Jun 16, 2017
Messages
202
Reaction score
118
Name: Sangilak Tapeesa (Ulva)
Faction: Sith
Rank: Sith Apprentice
Species: Nelvaanian.
Age: 24
Gender: Female
Force Sensitive: Yes, medium amount of training as a Sith

Appearance: Ulva is a Blue-furred, medium height (1.5 meters, 4.9 feet) and slender built (70 Kilograms, 154 pounds) Nelvaanian (Think of an anthromorphic arctic wolf) With tribal tattoos across her torso, arms, and chest. These tattoos symbolize that she is a warrior, hunter, and gatherer. She has a few scars, as well. Some are from being whipped, and some are from the intense lightsaber training she has recieved.

Stats [0-20]: Strength: 11 Dexterity: 17 Intelligence: 6 Wisdom: 10 Charisma: 18

Biography:
Ulva was one among many of her kind who was taken by a team of bounty hunters, to be sold into slavery to the Zygerrians, and the family that bought her were no exception to anyone else who would buy a slave. They were cruel, abusive and degrading. She made their food, laundry, dishes, etc.. Everything a slave does, basically. This was her life, and although she hated it, she could see no way out, so she simply accepted this as a way of her life. Ulva was getting older (19), however, and one day, while the family's wife was away, the husband "proposed a new task" for her. She refused this, which did not go well in conversation. The husband tried to force himself on her, resulting in a fight that made her realize some of her power. In a moment of fear and hatred, lightning shot from her fingertips, incapacitating him. Shocked, she stood there, looking at her hands, and pondering what had just happened. She tried again for awhile, but just couldn't get it. Soon, the wife came home, screaming for the guards upon seeing her husband on the ground, smoke still radiating from his body. Ulva, who had been hiding away, snuck up on her, stabbing her with a kitchen knife before the guards finally subdued her. Fortunately for her, an imperial patrol had been nearby and, realizing that she was a force sensitive, took her away from Zygerria, paying a decent sum in exchange for the guards to be silent about it. The husband died of "An electrical fault in the home, probably brought on by poor maintenance." And before she knew which way was up, she was on a one-way ticket straight to Korriban.

Attributes: Ulva is of average strength, maybe slightly below average for her species, though. She is very dexterous and mobile, and has excellent reflexes. However, she is not intelligent by any means, and is known for being simple-minded, needing orders to be very clear for her to correctly obey. She is an average pilot, able to maneuver decently and able to handle herself fairly enough in a dogfight, but when possible, she prefers to board other craft, so that she can utilize her lightsabers and force abilities to her advantage. She has an amazing cold tolerance, even for her kind, this makes Korriban seem like a very comfortable place to her. This in turn means that she has a lessened heat tolerance and she cannot do well in hot or humid regions such as Felucia, Tatooine, Geonosis, etc... Ulva has also learned to be well-spoken, especially for someone with her... 'Modest' intelligence, being able to calm a room relatively quickly, or cause someone to attack her first, if she needs, and is known also to generally remain calm when not in battle.

Personality: Ulva typically likes to mind her own business, not engaging in conversation with most of the other Sith or imperials unless she has to. That said, if someone is willing to talk to her, she is likely to open up quickly. Unless they are a cat-like creature, since Ulva remembers those who conditioned her, and hates all Zygerrians with a passion, and has grown heavily distrusting of any feline-resembling species. On the opposite end of the spectrum, she has an immediate respect for the Red Sith race, and is also especially friendly toward other canine-like races. Ulva enjoys torturing her victims if they are Zygerrians, otherwise she wants to end combat as quickly as possible, because she does not like the threat of death, nor the aggression she needs to use to fight. In her free time, between meditating, training, etc. Ulva likes to explore bits of Korriban, finding all sorts of nooks and crannies, even some unmarked caves, and wandering the tombs of ancient Sith Lords (when allowed). Due to her upbringing, she believes the Sith to be good and the Jedi to be evil. Still, given the chance she may speak with a Jedi rather than destroying it immediately, though she keeps this thought to herself.

Skills: Let's start with force powers, she knows the basics of push, pull, choke, and telekinesis, and excels at using lightning. She can use the force to enhance her physical abilities, and enjoys doing this a lot. She can sense incoming danger and threats of most kinds, but this is due to her animal-like instincts as well as her force abilities. Now, with lightsabers. Her favorite forms are form 5 (defending against blasters and deflecting the bolts.) and 7 (using your emotions to make your attacks unpredictable and less defensible, especially effective against force users..)

Possessions: Ulva has two red lightsabers, an X-57 Ziost hunter starfighter, Link here: http://www.thestarwarsrp.com/forum/index.php?threads/sith-empire-technology.64216/
A black cloak, travelers shoes, 5,000 credits, and some Enso MK II Combat Armor (for if she has to go to a desert planet for any reason, or if she needs to go undercover.) Link here: http://www.thestarwarsrp.com/forum/index.php?threads/enso-mk-ii-combat-armour.68192/

Pets: None yet

Everything else is pending, if you want to fight me, send me a pm and we'll see what we can do.

Change log: Added stats. Also added that she is well-spoken, as she'd need to be given her life​
 
Last edited:

Dark child

You- The Forty Six & 2
SWRP Writer
Joined
May 31, 2016
Messages
960
Reaction score
1,398
I'd take off the mention of the midichlorians. Other then that I'll just leave it up to the Sith and Jedi FLs to approve the bio. @Valen Pelora @Intratec
 

Valen Pelora

Mike, Joe Swanson
SWRP Writer
Joined
Dec 19, 2016
Messages
2,280
Reaction score
1,314
Hey there @Sarah! I'm going to go over the Jedi backstory but there are other areas of concern as well. I'm tagging the fantastic @Zenya and Sith Leadership (@Intratec, @Vinny, and @Malon)
  • MC Count: You don't need this and we don't really use is on the site to delineate strength in the Force.
  • Jedi History: Why would the night terrors get worse as she learned about the Jedi? Why didn't the Jedi try to do anything about this? That seems like something that would be noticed in an 8 year old child. I understand you are trying to balance out her strength in the Force with a relative lack of training with a Lightsaber, but it is not realistic a 13 year old would be as skilled as a Jedi Knight in the Force. You need to take out reference to her being "the chosen one." A brain aneurysm is a medical condition that in the SW universe could likely be fixed with medical science or the Force. I see no reason the Council would throw her out for something she could not control. If anything, they would attempt to heal her. You can defeat the guards, but "easily dispatching" them is not realistic for a 17 year old who is suffering from a serious mental break.
  • The Force: You cannot use both the Lightside and Darkside simultaneously. It is pretty much one or the other. You cannot be exceptionally skilled in both. There are also some powers I am not familiar with.
  • Overall: When reading the profile it sticks out to me as "over powered." She seems to be great or amazing at pretty much everything. Despite being only 24, and splitting time between the Jedi and Sith, she is somehow a master force user and master duelist.
I will let the others add any additional comments.
 

Sarah

Member
SWRP Writer
Joined
Jun 16, 2017
Messages
202
Reaction score
118
I'd take off the mention of the midichlorians. Other then that I'll just leave it up to the Sith and Jedi FLs to approve the bio. @Valen Pelora @Intratec
Wait a minute, why do the faction leaders have to approve of my character, a
Hey there @Sarah! I'm going to go over the Jedi backstory but there are other areas of concern as well. I'm tagging the fantastic @Zenya and Sith Leadership (@Intratec, @Vinny, and @Malon)
  • MC Count: You don't need this and we don't really use is on the site to delineate strength in the Force.
  • Jedi History: Why would the night terrors get worse as she learned about the Jedi? Why didn't the Jedi try to do anything about this? That seems like something that would be noticed in an 8 year old child. I understand you are trying to balance out her strength in the Force with a relative lack of training with a Lightsaber, but it is not realistic a 13 year old would be as skilled as a Jedi Knight in the Force. You need to take out reference to her being "the chosen one." A brain aneurysm is a medical condition that in the SW universe could likely be fixed with medical science or the Force. I see no reason the Council would throw her out for something she could not control. If anything, they would attempt to heal her. You can defeat the guards, but "easily dispatching" them is not realistic for a 17 year old who is suffering from a serious mental break.
  • The Force: You cannot use both the Lightside and Darkside simultaneously. It is pretty much one or the other. You cannot be exceptionally skilled in both. There are also some powers I am not familiar with.
  • Overall: When reading the profile it sticks out to me as "over powered." She seems to be great or amazing at pretty much everything. Despite being only 24, and splitting time between the Jedi and Sith, she is somehow a master force user and master duelist.
I will let the others add any additional comments.
Yeah, this was something I essentially made and then said "Well, I messed up here." I'll pretty much be re-writing her altogether. I wanted to make someone who could be a gray-area force user, but still manage to have her trained, knowing that there would be the argument of "well if being a jedi/sith didn't work out for her, why wouldn't she try being a sith/jedi?" So I wanted to eliminate possibility of that, do you have any suggestions in what I could do for making that?
 

Sarah

Member
SWRP Writer
Joined
Jun 16, 2017
Messages
202
Reaction score
118
But honestly (and this is NOT an excuse for my work being well below expectations) this resulted from what would normally have been a small vision, a big desire to make that vision true, and a lot of boredom and extra time.
 

Intratec

ಠ_ರೃ
SWRP Writer
Joined
Nov 27, 2013
Messages
1,090
Reaction score
371
AFL (Assistant Faction Leaders) or FL (Faction Leaders) are usually brought in when background involving the Jedi, Sith Mandolorians etc etc to glance over it to make sure it fits to the overall canon of the faction. And to provide some assistance if needed if further elaboration is necessary. It isn't a bad thing really, but we do, do this both for your benefit, as well as everyone's so we're all on the same page.
 

Malon

Veteran Member
SWRP Supporter
SWRP Writer
Joined
Sep 11, 2010
Messages
5,427
Reaction score
3,186
There are a few things I see that are problematic with the Sith portion of your back story. Since you have indicated that you are going to rewrite everything, I won't sit here and pelt you with them all. Just keep in mind, for your rewrite, that no one would be training you on Ithor. Ithor is completely demolished in this timeline, as a result of a Sith attack earlier in the timeline.

Also, please tag myself and @Valen Pelora when you have made your changes—especially if the Jedi and/or the Sith are involved in any part of this character. Faction Leaders are responsible for looking over characters that include their faction in the backstory to ensure that users are not doing things with the factions that would be out of character or overpowered.
 

Sarah

Member
SWRP Writer
Joined
Jun 16, 2017
Messages
202
Reaction score
118
There are a few things I see that are problematic with the Sith portion of your back story. Since you have indicated that you are going to rewrite everything, I won't sit here and pelt you with them all. Just keep in mind, for your rewrite, that no one would be training you on Ithor. Ithor is completely demolished in this timeline, as a result of a Sith attack earlier in the timeline.

Also, please tag myself and @Valen Pelora when you have made your changes—especially if the Jedi and/or the Sith are involved in any part of this character. Faction Leaders are responsible for looking over characters that include their faction in the backstory to ensure that users are not doing things with the factions that would be out of character or overpowered.
Thanks, and if you have any way that I could create a force user that wouldn't have to be a Jedi/Sith, and still be trained in the force, please let me know.
 

Valen Pelora

Mike, Joe Swanson
SWRP Writer
Joined
Dec 19, 2016
Messages
2,280
Reaction score
1,314
Thanks, and if you have any way that I could create a force user that wouldn't have to be a Jedi/Sith, and still be trained in the force, please let me know.

They could have been a Jedi or Sith and simply left for a number of reasons.
 

Dark child

You- The Forty Six & 2
SWRP Writer
Joined
May 31, 2016
Messages
960
Reaction score
1,398
Definitely do not scrap your ideas for the character. I am certain that we can find a way to suit the aspects to your tastes.

One thing that would make much more sense is if she was raised by the Sith but flees to the Jedi in the hopes that they can cure her nightmarish visions brought on by the Sith's cruelty when she was a pup. The Jedi do help her, and over the course of several months improvement can be seen. However something triggers a relapse in the visions causing her to loose control in front of a Jedi she had befriended, accidentally killing them in the process out of sheer fright. Horrified by the thought of facing judgment for her actions, she flees the Jedi. Scared, alone, and under the constant belief that the Sith or Jedi may come for her at any time, she now lives a life of solitude which is beginning to take it's tole on her sanity.

I tend to make things too dark but that's my take on something that might work.
 

Sarah

Member
SWRP Writer
Joined
Jun 16, 2017
Messages
202
Reaction score
118
Definitely do not scrap your ideas for the character. I am certain that we can find a way to suit the aspects to your tastes.

One thing that would make much more sense is if she was raised by the Sith but flees to the Jedi in the hopes that they can cure her nightmarish visions brought on by the Sith's cruelty when she was a pup. The Jedi do help her, and over the course of several months improvement can be seen. However something triggers a relapse in the visions causing her to loose control in front of a Jedi she had befriended, accidentally killing them in the process out of sheer fright. Horrified by the thought of facing judgment for her actions, she flees the Jedi. Scared, alone, and under the constant belief that the Sith or Jedi may come for her at any time, she now lives a life of solitude which is beginning to take it's tole on her sanity.

I tend to make things too dark but that's my take on something that might work.
I like this idea alot, it makes more sense, and I will probably take a lot of these ideas, and see what I can do with them.
 

Sarah

Member
SWRP Writer
Joined
Jun 16, 2017
Messages
202
Reaction score
118
Okay, I'm going to rewrite her as a Sith character, I have some better ideas for her as a Sith character, anyway. Thank you all for your input and I'm sorry for the original work... Just awful, my bad :blamesreeya:
 

Valen Pelora

Mike, Joe Swanson
SWRP Writer
Joined
Dec 19, 2016
Messages
2,280
Reaction score
1,314
I completely forgot to look at this. I will review it this evening. I will edit my comments into this post.

Comments: I see no mention of the Jedi. So all good on that front.
 

Sarah

Member
SWRP Writer
Joined
Jun 16, 2017
Messages
202
Reaction score
118
Thank you Valen, for your consideration.
 
Top