Ask Kashyyyk Buckets of Water

[Clove Vanhoop]

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Spoiler: Clove's Switter Timeline

Clove had been unsure what to do with her Switter account since becoming more famous than she could realistically handle. She'd been posting cute Porg pictures and pictures of her new heels, which... oddly enough only grew her following. But that was all, nothing of any impact, no call to action. That is, until she noticed some famous people rallying their followers to aid Kashyyyk. And without any hesitation, Clove copied them.

Her most recent message was sent just hours before she boarded her shuttle and flew to Kashyyyk. The half-Annfyn would be stationed at a camp with local Wookiees who had never escaped the planet as part of the mission Seeding Flowers. She was met with immediate regret upon arrival; the death that lingered in the Force was twice as painful as when she left the planet, the smoke was hard to breathe, and the soil was difficult for her cane to balance on. On top of that, the sight of the burned-down trees that had once stood so tall and proud, as well as the still-raging fires in the background, was depressing enough to make her heart ache.

But just like before, Clove pushed through.

She was dressed in her new armor, armor that wasn't quite Jedi. No, not yet. Because, today, the armor stood for Sugar Heels, or Hell on (w)heels. And, while the people would eventually realize the armor was that of a Jedi, she'd enjoy the benefits of her semi-anonymity for the time being.

Once arrived at the camp, Clove ID'ed herself before instantly making her way towards the first local in sight. A younger Wookiee, whose arm fur had been burned away. Clove smiled as she approached the girl, kneeling slowly in the dirt to reach eye level.

While the young girl couldn't understand galactic basic, the volunteers were often given tablets with translation programs, which Clove used to communicate with her. "Hey there, you have some beautiful fur. Are you hungry?" The tablet listened to Clove's voice before growling and roaring, causing the girl to tilt her head before nodding. "Okay then, well, I got something!" Clove reached into her trusty leather bag, which never left her shoulder, and pulled out a bottle of water and a sandwich. The sandwich was stuffed with local berries, some wild plants and some spice. Spice that, as Clove was told, the Wookiees enjoyed eating. But it was a little too spicy for her.

"There you go, once you are done eating we'll take a look at your arm, okay?"

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Tag @Sreeya ​

 

[Altair Din]

Altair had nothing better to do and he was lounging around and scrolling through Switter feeds. Eventually, he came across some updates posted by Clove. He had heard about Kashyyyk, of course, and it certainly left him feeling odd. He knew the Sith were at war, but could he entirely agree with wiping out entire chunks of a planet like that? Altair scrolled and read the updates about the Jedi actions there, some even posting tasteless memes about the parachute incident. He hated himself for chuckling a bit at some of them.

Deciding to get off his lazy ass, he hopped into his ship, his own ship that he acquired with some of his huttball money. Altair decided he would check out the planet for himself. Naturally, he opted to wear regular civilian attire instead of presenting as Sith. He never carried a lightsaber, so that was never an issue.

Altair sensed the death and agony on the planet at once, and it was unsettling. Nevertheless, he made his way over to the volunteer tents. He caught a few terrified glances shot his way, some looking at him with hatred. Among all the death and despair, he possibly appeared like a dark omen with his appearance. The tiefling ignored it, though his tail drooped a bit sadly.

He spotted Clove after a moment and he perked up, walking over and smiling at her, “Surprise!” He called out, “Saw you were doin’ some community service. Thought I’d help!” He said. She would notice his ship keys attached to his hip with the key chain she gave him there. Altair had a small box with him as he walked up to her, “Figured you could use a snack,” He opened it for her. They were cupcakes with bright pink frosting, and topped with little handcrafted ballet shoes made from meringue powder and candies with artificial food coloring. It was obvious a lot of care was put into these, “I almost sat on the box at some point so hope it’s okay,” Altair said sheepishly.

He looked around, spotting all the different tents, “I thought I could set up a soup kitchen or food drive or…” Altair shrugged, “I’m fireproof if you need a strong buff dude to go pull people out of a crisis.”


@LilyNion

 

[Clove Vanhoop]

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Clove was burying her hands in a bottle of anti-burn salve when a voice called out "surprise!". The half-Annfyn literally jumped before turning around, her eyes widened and startled, her fingertips dripping some of the medicine onto the forest floor. But the moment her gaze fell on Altair, her face softened and her lips curled upwards instinctively. It was Altair!

It was Altair.

Her smile had faded slightly for a moment, but she slid the gloves off her hands as she moved closer to the Tiefling. She'd been conflicted about anything related to Altair since she'd left the party and spent the night on the toilet. And his presence on Kashyyyk, a planet devastated by the faction of which his girlfriend is a member, only worsened the conflict. Did he know? But then she noticed the keychain on his belt and the cupcake box in his hands with the ballet shoes, and all of that conflict faded away momentarily, as if nothing had happened. "Well hello there Altair!" Her ears perked up slightly as she smiled brighter than before. "You are an absolute gem, thank you so much! I'd give you a hug but I don't want to destroy that box of yummies."

She looked into the box with what could only be described as a longing gaze. "I'm not supposed to be eating on the job because I don't want to make anyone jealous... but..." After biting her lowerlip, she grabbed one of the cupcakes from the box and took a big chomp. "Oh my Force." She hummed, her eyes closing for a brief moment in bliss. "Nobody has to know I'm devouring a cupcake secretly!"

She opened her eyes and returned her gaze to the Tiefling, still trying to compose herself after that bite and refraining from shoving the entire cupcake into her mouth. Right, help. He was here for help! "Hmmmm." She pondered while taking a small bite. "A food drive would be good. There's a food shortage at a camp north of here, but because it's so close to a still-burning section of the forest, volunteers are reluctant to go there. Perhaps we could make a big pot of soup and deliver it to them?" Clove chuckled, tilting her head to the right. "Because you're fireproof and all, we might be able to help them out more properly."

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Tag @Sreeya ​

 

[Altair Din]

Altair didn’t miss how her smile faded at first when she spotted him. What was that about? Confusion would briefly flicker across his face, but he recovered when she did. He had to chuckle when she attempted very hard not to stuff her face with the cupcakes, “I think you’ve earned a few cupcakes for your hard work,” He said, “I think people have bigger concerns than whether or not you’re sneaking a few, anyway,” Altair grinned before he looked out across at the camps.

He could practically smell the stench of death all around. He could taste the fear and anxiety. When he donned his Sith armor, it was something he could almost embrace. It was something he almost relished. The thought frightened him as he gazed at the injured Wookiees clutching their children or limping away. Several of them had missing limbs or were immobile. He could hear their groans and agonized moaning. Altair imagined a world where Clove could be caught up in this and be burned and he felt a pang against his chest.

“I’m glad you weren’t here when it happened..” He muttered quietly. If not for her super hearing, she wouldn’t have heard it. His gaze remained ahead, vibrant purple hues burning. It was difficult to read what was going on inside his head at that moment, “Relieved you’re all right..”

Altair cleared his throat after a moment and shook himself out of it. He cheered up again, making his way towards the cooking tent. The tiefling’s face scrunched up as he sniffed at some of the foods, “Oh none of this will do,” He said very snobbily as he began to grab a bunch of ingredients to chop and sprinkle into a pot. Altair looked up at Clove.

“There were some plants that are an offshoot of nysillin that I saw on the way here,” He grabbed a baggy and showed it to her, taking the contents out to chop them up and add to the food, “Should help the recovery process,” Altair said as he happily continued to work to make the food to deliver to the other camp.

"Those plants?" The others in the tent perked up, "We can go get more!"

"Yeah, that'll help," Altair answered, watching the others clear out and leaving only Altair and Clove behind. The tiefling quietly hummed to himself as he cooked “Oh they’re just gonna gobble this up,” He said with a smile as he stirred the stew.

@LilyNion

 

[Clove Vanhoop]

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Clove was taken aback by Altair's muttering. Glad she wasn't there when it happened? So he didn't know about her 'job,' or that she'd been on Kashyyyk at the same time as the many bombs glassed the surface? While she was impressed by Aadya's silence, it also stung her. And while his little 'relieved you're all right' was the cutest and made her lips curl up involuntarily once more, a little restless fire began to flicker in her stomach.

Altair didn't seem to notice; he just cheered up and dashed off to the cooking tent as if nothing had happened.

Clove followed him around the tent, looking around. To be honest, she'd never been in one before. She spent the majority of her time at the medical tents, and whenever she had free time, she'd go for a walk or snack and nap in one of the shuttles that flew the volunteers. So she was taken aback when Altair made a face and practically lifted his nose for the pot. What have those poor Wookiees been eating up to this point?

She blinked at Altair, clearly trying to figure out what he was talking about. She was familiar with herbs, but only in a medical sense. Not quite for eating. So his rather impressive cooking skills and talk both amazed and confused her. Fortunately, the other people in the tent understood Altair better than she did and had gone off to get some for them. "Huh. That's very kind of them." She said after they'd all gone, her gaze lowering to the stew.

"Well, it smells great." She returned a faint smile, her thumbs fiddling with the hems of the oversized cape sleeves. Then there was silence. Clove didn't mind silence in general; she'd just... daydream. But Kashyyyk wasn't exactly a daydream location, with death clawing its way to the foreground. And what was she supposed to daydream about in the first place? How Altair's hot girlfriend was most likely to blame for those deaths? And how, even if she wasn't, she was certainly responsible for a lot of other people's deaths? And how could he be kissing such a vulgar poisonous witch who, in her opinion, spit on what love meant? And they kissed?! Gross. So disgusting.

That small cold fire in her stomach grew larger and larger, knotting her stomach as it rose until it felt as if her stomach was about to collapse on itself.

Clove clicked her tongue and raised her eyes to Altair for a split second, catching his violet gaze before placing her empty-non-cupcake hand on the kitchen counter and rocking back and forth on her heels. "Sooo... the other day, I saaaww something funny on the beach. You and Aadya, huh?" She cast him another look while taking bite out of her cupcake.

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Tag @Sreeya ​

 

[Altair Din]

Altair was normally an oblivious idiot. However, he had been around Clove enough to know she normally radiated energies of sunshine and kittens. It was something he always found refreshing and a nice break from the doom and gloom he was usually surrounded by. As a result, he was able to pick up the shifts in her demeanor. Every now and then he glanced up only to see her look…almost reproachful? She was giving short, quick answers and looking vacant. A part of him was hurt by all this. He had come all this way to help her and she was being downright weird. Altair thought back to the party and how she had seemingly disappeared. She also had been quiet in general during their communications.

When Clove asked about Aadya, his eyes widened slightly. He stared at her unblinkingly for a moment, stepping back from stirring the stew. He actually reached over to lower the heat to a simmer to ensure nothing burned, “All right, Wheels,” Altair said, “Why you actin’ sketch?” He asked her point blank, “You been weird since the party. I thought you’d be happy to see me but you’re actin’...I dunno..not you.”

Altair frowned slightly, “And uh… yeah.. I’m with Aadya I guess,” He said awkwardly, still in disbelief that the whole thing actually happened. He fidgeted slightly, reaching a hand up to idly brush through his hair. He cleared his throat, “But that don’t explain why you’re actin’ like I put salt in your cupcakes. I know I didn’t,” Altair stated directly, his gaze piercing into hers.

@LilyNion

 

[Clove Vanhoop]

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Aww man. That's unfair. Why did he have to stare at her like that? Clove's gaze followed Altair as he turned down the heat, stepped away from the pot and instead looked her in straight the eyes and gave her the most direct answer. And, of course, he gave her a nickname that caused her to bite the inside of her cheek and feel another pang in her stomach.

Just like that, he completely disarmed her.

Whatever tough attitude she had melted almost instantly, her ears drooping. "No, I'm very happy to see you! I'm sorry, I didn't mean to make you think otherwise. It's just..." It's just, what? Was she going to reply as bluntly and directly as he did? Tell him about Aadya, the Sith who cracked skulls as a hobby and was a spine destroyer? She wanted to, but the way Altair frowned... and remembering how happy he looked on the beach with Aadya, she wasn't sure she could.

The half-Annfyn sighed, lowered the cupcake to the counter and turned around to face Altair fully. She grabbed both of his hands, a habit that had grown worse over time; whenever she was in a difficult situation, she just liked to hold someone's hands. "By the way, it's not the cupcakes; you didn't put salt in them. They're the best thing I've eaten in a long time." She managed a sliver of a smile.

"Okay. Listen. I'm not sure how to say any of this, so I'll just talk and see where the rambling takes me, okay?" She sighed once again, this time a little more nervously. "Okay. So. I've known Aadya long before we met. And, to put it mildly, my interactions with her have been less than perfect. And seeing you kiss her got me..." Clove's chocolate brown eyes danced away for a moment before returning to Altair. "It got me feeling very conflicted. Because, obviously, I'm not the one who decides your happiness or who you date. But I also don't want you to get hurt. You've helped me so much and I just want the best for you, you know. So I've avoided you a little because I didn't know what to say or do. Do I warn you? Do I just let you be and let you find your own happiness?"

Clove's gaze had lowered to their hands by the time she finished her rambling, clearly too embarrassed to look him in the eyes. Weeeeell. She wasn't quite finished. Because there was more. "And now that I'm being completely honest, I've realized that I'm also a little jealous, and I'm not sure what to do about it because it's all new to me. I think it's jealousy anyway? I've never felt anything like this before." She paused before quickly adding, "But I swear it has nothing to do with my dislike for Aadya! I disliked her long before I got a bit jealous."

"Force, I'm sweating more than a Jedi in a Sith temple." Clove muttered now that she was actually finished.

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Tag @Sreeya ​

 

[Altair Din]

Altair half expected her to fall back into her usual kind words or dance around the topic. However, perhaps it was the way he stared at her or the directness of his questions, but she started to talk. Their surroundings seemingly blurred into an abstract all around them, and he largely forgot about the mission or volunteering. The rich and delicious aroma of the stew filled the camp, but it was still on a low simmer.

He was a bit taken aback by everything she said, and he could tell it was difficult for her to admit it all. Altair blinked for a few moments after she was done. He looked away, face flushing a bit as he awkwardly fiddled with one of his horns. There was a lot to unpack there, but he opened this door with his blunt questions and he wouldn’t weasel away now.

“If she hurts me, then she’ll be no different than every girl before her or after her,” Altair said, smiling sadly as he looked away, “It’s what I’m used to. It’s no more than I’m destined for, I guess. So I don’t sweat it. If by some miracle she doesn’t end up just usin’ me, then it’ll be nice. But I ain’t new to heartbreak. If she breaks my heart, I'll move on for the next person that wants to do me dirty,” It was obvious he had a fatalistic view of relationships and love despite being in one. He looked up at her, his expression somber, “You don’t gotta fret over me, I can survive bein’ kicked where it hurts the most.”

Altair shrugged vaguely, “A lot of girls don’t like Aadya, but she ain’t treat me bad. A lot of people think I'm a monster or a demon too, but you don't mind me. The main times I’ve seen chicks really dislike Aadya and me are if…” He thought briefly to Vahliri and then the bits about Clove admitting to jealousy. The tiefling’s eyes widened slightly and his face suddenly grew very hot.

“Why…is this actually bothering you, Clove?”

@LilyNion

 

[Clove Vanhoop]

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Clove's brow furrowed as Altair 'admitted' that he was destined to be heartbroken. His perspective on love, on romance, was completely contradictory to her idealistic one, in which love was pure and the cure for all ills. "What? Altair, you can't be serious?" Her head tilted to the right, her gaze returning to him. "Do you really see yourself like that? A pretty toy for girls to abuse and discard once they've had their fill of you? You are SO much more than that. Love is far more than that." His saddened smile, followed by a somber expression, clearly bother her. "Knowing you've been treated like this I'll absolutely fret over you."

Then he shrugged, shifting the conversation back to Aadya. And it was clear that it irritated her, her ears flickering ever so slightly annoyed, a gesture he'd seen Vahliri's ears do plenty of times. "It's not like that; you know I wouldn't judge someone if I didn't have a reason. That's why I don't mind you; your horns don't define your personality; it's your actions that do. And you haven't done demony-actions!"

“Why…is this actually bothering you, Clove?”

Clove's cheeks instantly turned a deep violet, her freckles standing out even more against her skin than before. She knew where his question was heading. As naive as she was, she wasn't blind to his widened eyes, the way his skin around his cheeks began to burn, or where his previous sentence trailed off. "If you think I don't like her just because I like you, you're mistaken! I told you I despised her long before you and I met!"

Clove took a small step back, her skin getting warmer and warmer as she realized what she had just said. "... I'm going to get the speeder ready."

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Tag @Sreeya ​

 

[Altair Din]

Altair’s eyes narrowed as she spoke to his perspective on relationships and love. He couldn’t help the way a spike of anger streaked through him, especially when she implied he had never done anything wrong. His mind flashed back to the Jedi he had killed not too long ago. He thought about the Jedi he and Aadya had left for dead, where he desecrated the temple further by his actions with Aadya. He hadn’t felt remorse then, but what would Clove have to say about all that? She could be so damn naive sometimes! She thought everyone was a good person, everyone was perfect and the moment anyone deviated from that it was someone to hate? Would she even accept him if she ever knew the truth about him? That he was ultimately a soldier doing what soldiers were supposed to do in a war?

“If that’s how it always ends up, that’s the reality I accept,” Altair said, a bit of emotion bleeding into his tone, “Love does nothin' but sting, and I keep entertaining it like a fucking idiot. I never learn. It always ends up shattering me and I spend time picking up each piece, putting some new shitty version of me back together, and fucking do it again,” Altair’s chest was rising and falling rapidly and he was fired up, “You’ve seen the Sith’s actions in history and in the past. Would you ever consider the idea that not all Sith are like that?” He asked sternly, feeling a sting in his chest as he did so. She would turn on him in an instant if she ever knew the truth. His question hit close to home for him, but the example worked the same, “No, you wouldn’t, because you’ve seen a pattern and you drew conclusions. I’m no different.”

The tiefling was shaken violently out of his tirade when Clove spoke next. Both of them realized at the same time what was said. Had she just admitted to liking him? Altair’s jaw dropped slightly as he stared at her with wide eyes. For a moment he looked like a fish out of water, opening and closing his mouth without words coming out. His tail began to erratically swish back and forth. He heard her mumble about getting the speeder ready. Altair took a step forward.

“Clove…” He said quietly, but he couldn’t say much beyond that. He was still reeling from the admission, his chest suddenly feeling constricted as if he couldn’t breathe. His mind was in flux, and he lowered the hand he had subconsciously reached out towards her without even realizing. Altair looked away, silence hanging between them as Clove prepared to leave. For all the ways heat couldn't penetrate his skin, his entire being felt ablaze right then.

@LilyNion

 

[Clove Vanhoop]

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Altair took a step forward and extended his hand to her, but all she could do was stand there. Even if she wanted to go to the speeder, she had long forgotten where it was. No, Clove's mind was racing with thoughts, and emotions she'd never felt before raged through her body. For a second or two, her palms brushed against her face as she tried to sort through at least one or two of those thoughts.

Then her hands dropped from her face, and her gaze returned to Altair, who appeared to be just as lost as she was. Clove's brows began to burrow more and more, while a few thoughts finally became louder than the rest; finally something she could focus on. Why did he have to mention the Sith? Mentioned that not every Sith was like that? Did he know about Aadya, and was he defending his girlfriend? Or was her paranoia kicking in, and this was merely an example?

Regardless, the half-Annfyn took a step closer to Altair without warning, her head tilted upwards to look him in the eyes and her ears drawn backward onto her scalp. "Don't ever assume that I draw conclusions like that." Clove's normally bubbly, almost sing-song voice had gone flat and lower than usual. "I'm not sure why you felt the need to bring up the Sith in the first place, or why you compare love to the Sith at all. But I'm not going to let you drag me along in your pessimistic frame of mind." She took a breather and then continued "And, you know what, I don't know romance stuff as well as you do; I've never even kissed before. Kriff, turns out, I can't even confess feelings properly. But I know you're not talking about love. Love is not supposed to tear you apart and shatter your soul. You may be walking against ten thousand walls over and over again, pursuing it as if it were a drug, but that is not love. And if it is, then I refuse to believe it!"

Her entire posture changed, and her outburst of anger vanished as quickly as it appeared. Despite her short stature, she always managed to radiate a presence that made her appear larger. But now, suddenly, she felt, and looked, so small, so tiny. "Do you really believe that I'd just... see a Darksider or Sith and deem them pure evil because they have a bad history?"

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Tag @Sreeya ​

 

[Altair Din]

Altair was deep in his thoughts, and he even walked over to start stirring the stew again. However, that was when Clove began to answer. He caught the way her ears flattened, his comment about the Sith having touched a nerve. Of course it did. It always did, with everyone. The entire galaxy saw them as monsters, and in many ways he couldn’t disagree. For him people saw him as a monster just because of his appearance. He could be a Jedi and he would still have been rejected because of it. Sith at least allowed him to fully embrace who he was.

Seeing Clove go off on him hurt more than he’d ever admit. Altair didn’t meet her gaze, quietly stirring the pot as his jaw tightened. The only signs of his irritation came from the way his tail flicked back and forth, “It ain’t pessimistic,” He said quietly, “It’s real,” He looked up at her, eyes narrowing, “You think everything is like those sappy movies you watch. You think it won’t hurt you, it won’t bite, it won’t make you give up a bit of yourself. Naw, you think it’s just all sunshine and daisies just like how you look at the rest of the galaxy, Clove,” He pointed a finger outside, “Look out there, Clove! That’s what’s real! War is real! Suffering is real! Fantasies and romance fairytales where everything works out just fine ain’t nothin’ but dreams.”

She didn’t know. She couldn’t know. She had never felt love’s sting, “And if you wanted to be kissed maybe you shoulda fuckin’ spoken up instead of being a porg,” Altair blurted out before he could stop himself in the middle of his tirade. He followed up by clearing his throat and aggressively stirring the stew to where some of it was splashing out and staining his clothes. His gaze was fixated on a single piece of potato floating around in a circle.

“I think if you saw a Darksider you’d look at ‘em like they were a problem. Like they can only be a darksider if they broken or messed up, not because they choose it,” Altair said, quickly attempting to change topics, “You would wanna fix ‘em. You’d try to make them see the world like you do, where it’s all sunshine and lothcats. And then you’d hate ‘em because they can’t ever be that..” Because I can’t ever be that, he said to himself as he continued stirring. His tail was drooping at this point, and he still refused to look at her.

@LilyNion

 

[Clove Vanhoop]

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All she could do was stand there and silently listen to Altair fire back at her. While his initial defense of not being pessimistic was unpleasant, it quickly became hurtful. Especially when he backhandedly confessed feelings for her and then called her a Porg. If he had stopped there, she would have calmed down and taken a breather, but he didn't. He changed the subject and only added salt to the wounds.

Her gaze was fixed on Altair and his pan of stew, as well as droplets of aggressively stirred liquid, as she took in his words, her face betraying the hurt long before she could blink or think of an answer.

But, really, it was pointless to try; the words poured out of her mouth before she could form even a single sentence in her mind.

"I was here, Altair." She blurted out. "When the attack happened, I was here. In a freaking ISC refugee camp, feeling the Wookiees die left and right. Do you actually believe I'm that freaking naive? That I don't see the pain and suffering?! I've fought for this galaxy! How the kriff do you think I got paralyzed in the first place?! A freak accident that somehow split my spine into two, as a Force User?!" Her cheeks began to burn, but not because she was flustered; she was boiling. "But I know there's more to life than pain and suffering because I've seen it! I felt nothing but pure happiness when we were in that stupid garden with those stupid pretty birds. And if you just open your damn eyes, there's plenty of that happiness in this galaxy!"

"And yes. Yes, Altair, I'd totally fix a Darksider without their consent and think they're broken and absolutely loathe them." Her arms swung around animatedly without her even being aware of it. "It's almost as if Sol didn't use Force Lightning like a Darksider, and it's almost as if I didn't accept his freaking invitation to your birthday party without questioning him or the party. A birthday surrounded by freaking Sith, for that matter! But, obviously, the moment I see a Sith, oh no, beware. I'd try to fix them or hate them without even knowing who they were!" Her eyes narrowed as she looked at him, and her hands curled into fists. "Because that's apparently how I see things, isn't it? Nothing but happiness and sunshine, and hatred for anything else?"

Deep down, she knew she had to respond to the romantic fairytales claim or his kissing statement. But she also knew that addressing those subjects while she was on the verge of yelling would only cause more harm than good. So, for the time being, she bit her tongue and avoided those subjects.

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Tag @Sreeya ​

 

[Altair Din]

Altair’s eyes widened as she revealed she had been there after all. It made his blood run cold, and he still refused to believe it. He couldn’t accept that she could possibly be….a Jedi. His sworn enemy. He couldn’t process that. He felt sick and numb. He felt hypocritical the more she spoke, the more she revealed about how she showed up to his party knowing it was full of Sith. Altair stepped back from the stew, feeling the urge to vomit. His tail was flicking back and forth erratically and his knees felt as if they would collapse under his weight.

He thought back to the garden and where it felt as if he could forget about the war. He thought about how she mentioned feeling free. It all began to fall into place like pieces of a puzzle. He stepped back till his back was against the side of the tent, and he kept his gaze off her. Altair wanted to scream at her, wanted to rewind time, he wanted to go back to when it was just him bringing her the cupcakes and them delivering the stupid soup together. He wanted to go back to being oblivious. He wanted to go back to seeing her smile or him cracking jokes about her height.

He was a hypocrite.

He told her she could see Sith as nothing but dark, but now he struggled to see her as anything but an enemy. Was he jumping to conclusions? No, she had to be a Jedi. Did that mean she knew he was a Sith? She had come to the party knowingly, knowing there would be Sith. Altair breathed in shallow, rapid bursts.

“You got hurt because you chose to walk a path and throw yourself into a war. No one chose it for you,” He said flatly. The same applied to him and killing the Jedi he did. Altair didn’t ask her for details, it was too painful to face. He was too much of a coward to ask, to face the truth, to even explore who or why, even though a very small part of him already knew. He quelled the thought, he silenced those voices, he shut down that logic. He didn’t have the strength to face it.

She had wondered how it all connected. She questioned his examples. She threw all his logic right back in his face. Altair was silent through her tirade. Because in the end it did converge, it did matter, it did make a difference.

“Could you ever love a Sith?”

@LilyNion

 

[Clove Vanhoop]

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The way Altair stumbled, his ash skin turning a color she'd never seen before, his tail flicking back and forth as if he was struggling to keep his balance. It was as if she saw Altair finish the puzzle she'd been desperately trying to hide until today, as if he finally realized who he was speaking with. The final piece he needed was her admitting she was on Kashyyyk that day.

There was no answer that she could give to his statement. They both knew it was true. Even on Dantooine, where she wasn't supposed to be fighting, she chose to be there as a Jedi. So all she could do was nod faintly.

And, after all was said and done, after all the questioning, his follow-up question was the missing piece she needed. Sure, she suspected Sol was a Sith, and the presence of so many Sith at Altair's birthday party was suspicious. But she refused to acknowledge it or even consider it. Surely, he just had an unusual taste in friends. Surely, that was all they were: friends, not colleagues, not allies. Because she wasn't sure if she could face the reality; her black bird, a Sith.

A Sith knowingly dating the woman of her nightmares.

Every bit of color that had previously built its way into her skin drained away. And with it, any anger that had made its way through her tirade faded, leaving her with an emptiness in the center of her chest and a pain she'd never felt before. She didn't want to sit; not now, she couldn't look weak. And yet, her legs could barely support her weight, and her cane was somewhere in the camp that no longer existed in her mind. So all she could do was lean against the kitchen counter, her hands resting on top of it, still pale and stiff from the fists. All the while, her gaze was fixed on the Tiefling.

Everything came down to this. The fighting over the Sith and Darksiders, the slip-ups, this is where it all leads to. She had to answer him.

"I don't know. Without the fighting? Yes, I would try. With it? I'm... not sure how that would work." Her eyebrows furrowed just a bit. Would both Jedi and Sith be able to see eye-to-eye while killing each other's allies if they were fighting in the same war? Would they fight if faith pits them against each other on the battlefield? "I'd like to ask you the same question. But... I'm not sure it matters, does it? Aadya has captured your heart. I saw the look in your eyes on that beach. I could give you all the gruesome details about her, but you... already know who she is."

---

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Tag @Sreeya ​

 

[Altair Din]

Altair felt her eyes on him, but he still didn’t look. He heard her words and he could almost hear traces of defeat in her tone. It betrayed just how much she had seen without him even realizing. It betrayed just how much it had mattered to her. And it revealed his own obliviousness. Altair couldn’t deny how he felt about Aadya. He couldn’t deny how she had nurtured him, how she let her walls down and, in turn, took down his. He couldn’t deny the genuine ways she smiled at him or the way she made herself vulnerable leaning against his chest and sinking into his arms. He knew who she was, but he didn’t know the Aadya Clove knew.

“I….know the parts I want to know…” Altair admitted very quietly, audible only by her half Annfyn hearing. He didn’t want to know everything, because he knew what Sith were like. He knew what they were capable of and Aadya didn’t get to where she was without crossing moral boundaries. Could his actions against the Jedi he killed be justified? He thought about her question. He thought about his life as a soldier. He thought about the duty he had and the commitment and promise he had made to his Master. He had no intention of ever straying from that path, just as he knew she wouldn’t stray from hers. It was one of the things he respected and admired about her.

“The war and our allegiances didn’t matter in that garden,” Altair state quite flatly after a long moment of silence, answering her question nevertheless in a very roundabout way. It was the truth. Jedi, Sith, none of it mattered then. It was when he withdrew entirely and he was just Altair from Bandomeer. The fighting would never stop, he knew that. But he knew there was a place in his mind and in his heart where he could escape from it, where he could run from it. Even if it wasn’t allowed. Even if it was wrong. He knew he could, because he had done it. And he had done it that day he unassumingly wandered over looking for something and finding something entirely different.

The tiefling noticed the way she was leaning against the counter. Altair used the Force to call over Clove’s cane, walking closer to her. He towered over her, but she would see the defeated posture he held. He gently held the cane to her so she could support herself. It was the first time in a while he met her gaze, and he stood much closer. She would see every bit of emotion and fire in his violet gaze. So many words that would never pass his lips, so many chapters in a book he refused to open, so much pain he would suppress as he always had.

“I know Aadya like you know me, Clove,” He said very quietly, “Only the parts you want to know. Only the parts that will keep you around. It’s all I want you to know..” Altair swallowed the lump in his throat, “Because I would lose you otherwise. Because I wouldn’t be able to stand the way you look at me otherwise.”

@LilyNion

 

[Clove Vanhoop]

---

Clove's eyes lowered ever so slightly. Something about him admitting he only knew the Aadya he wanted to know made the stinging worse. And, while it also armed her with the perfect weapon to cut Aadya away from him, she couldn't. She couldn't bring herself to twist the blade into Altair's back, no matter how angry, upset, or hurt she felt, or how badly she wanted to free him. Because, while it would give her everything she wished, it would harm Altair in the process.

Clove could only stare at a fixed point on Altair's shirt during the long silence. Where her mind had once been a whirlpool of unstable emotions, there was now emptiness, echoing the feelings in her chest. It wasn't until he mentioned the garden that some thoughts bubbled to the surface, reminding her of happier times. She felt so freed with him, no war, no bloodshed, no worries about being a good Jedi where one screwup could endanger the entire Order, and no constant battle against the ever-shrinking galaxy. Just them, as Clove and Altair, two strangers who met due to a misunderstanding about some herbs.

Altair's sudden movement jolted her out of her vacant stare, forcing her to blink a few times. Altair was standing next to her, towering over her, with her last blink. And yet, he didn't look tall. He looked almost as tall as she is. Her large brown eyes met his fiery violet gaze, which spoke louder than a thousand words. He displayed more emotion than he would have liked to. Her right hand moved away from the counter and reached for the cane, all the while keeping her gaze frozen on his. Her lips formed a 'thank you,' but no sound came out of her mouth.

"We can't..." Her throat was so constrained that she couldn't even finish the sentence. And maybe that was for the best because it wasn't something that needed to be said aloud. They both knew what this meant. While the half-Anfynn was clearly trying to remain strong, her face began to reflect the pain that was as clear as day in her eyes. "Then... let us only know what we want to know. And go to a lot of gardens and parties." She eventually managed to respond quietly. "That's better than losing you..." Her lips curled slightly, but it was clearly forced. "I'd rather have a smidgeon of Altair than nothing at all."

She'd have to accept that, while they were having fun at some new garden, Aadya was waiting for Altair to return home, to give him the attention Clove could never give him.

---

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Tag @Sreeya ​

 

[Altair Din]

Where could they even go from here? Would they just go back to pretending none of this ever came up? He stood there in silence until Clove finally spoke, pain betrayed in her voice and the way her smile didn’t quite reach her eyes. Altair didn’t need her to finish the sentence - he already knew. The tiefling didn’t even know how they got here or when any of this happened. It was always easier for him to brush things aside than to face them, and this time both of them had to face it head on.

Altair smiled sadly when she mentioned going to gardens and only knowing the parts of each other they could accept. He couldn’t say anything to that. The reality was that he was the monster. What could he have to accept about her other than the fact that she wanted to do good in the galaxy? That she wanted to fight back against those that glassed entire planets? That she was foolish for fighting an inevitable war that would see her killed? On the other hand, she would have to accept that he was a disciplined soldier. That he would kill any that stood in his way if his directives called for it. That while he didn’t approve of glassing a planet, he was a part of the same Order. No, she could never accept him. He had to be the one to keep her blissfully unaware. It shattered him to accept the reality that she could never truly know him, but even a sliver was better than nothing. Even that brief glimpse, that small reprieve from everything else was better than trying to erase her from his mind, than to pretend she never existed.

He didn’t even realize how long he had been standing there or how long he had just been gazing at her. He lost track of how many words and conversations took place in his mind, lost track of how many of them were betrayed in his eyes. For all the ways he could appear as a demon, his eyes always gave him away with the tenderness they held. The tenderness they were still capable of..for now.

“Hey we have the-Oh,” Some of the others burst into the tent with the plants, staring wide eyed at Altair and Clove just standing there. The tension could be cut with a knife, “Are we….interrupting something?” The man asked awkwardly.

“No,” Altair answered, his gaze still on Clove. He lingered there for a moment before looking up and walking over to grab the plants. He chopped them up and added them to the stew which was on the verge of burning.

“The food is ready,” He said to Clove without looking up, still recovering from earlier. It was difficult to snap back into work mode, “Can you get the speeder?”

Altair put his hands on the piping hot cauldron, put a lid on it, and lifted it up without a second thought.The others in the tent audibly gasped at the sight, not used to seeing a tiefling.

@LilyNion

 

[Clove Vanhoop]

---

Clove eyes that had begun to grow tired lingered on Altair as the world faded away. There were no words to say, none that would not break the silence between the two. How did she get into this mess? Her mother had always warned her. "Be careful of your emotions, my little flower, they are quick to overtake you," as was the nature of any Annfyn, half or not. And she was always so careful, perfectly content to avoid anything remotely romantic, knowing it would otherwise consume her. And yet here she was, her mother's words falling on deaf ears, her gaze hopelessly glued to the Tiefling's violet eyes. Would she ever be content with just a taste, a nibble, of what could be?

The men and women from the cooking tent had returned somewhere along the line, but Clove hadn't noticed. It wasn't until Altair replied that the half-Annfyn's ears twitched and her body began to unfreeze. She had to compose herself, somehow. Thankfully, the Tiefling gave her a task, the same task she was supposed to do earlier. Did she regret not going to that speeder when she had the chance? Everything would have been fine if she had.

Clove pushed herself away from the counter, shaking her head as if to clear her mind, and turned onto her heels in the direction of where she last saw the speeder. "Sure." She replied to the Tiefling. She walked toward the vehicle, her hand squeezing the light pink quartz handle of the cane. After arriving, Clove hopped onto the chair as quickly as her legs would allow and started the engine. She knew she was a disaster with anything mechanical, especially now that her heart was pounding in her chest and her mind was a mess, so she took her time getting the speeder closer to the camp.

The last thing they needed was another Wookiee incident.

"Hop on-" She came to a stop, staring at Altair, who held the piping hot cauldron in his hands. It wasn't the sight that brought her to a stop; she'd seen Altair withstand fire and heat before. No, it was the realization that she'd have to drive all the way to the camp because he was forced to keep the cauldron in his palms.

---

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Tag @Sreeya ​

 

[Altair Din]

Altair made a point not to look at the others in the tent. He could feel their eyes on him, and he knew they had many questions. They walked in on tension and the energy felt entirely different from when Altair and Clove originally arrived. The weight of everything revealed and said was almost crushing, but he had come here with a purpose, and that was to help her. He would do that even if he knew what she was, even if she knew what he was. Would she even keep in touch with him after this? Would she follow through on what she said, or were those empty words to spare his feelings? He watched her leave the tent, his jaw tightening.

He had to be stronger than this. He had to remember the path he chose. He couldn’t waver and he couldn’t falter.

The tiefling carried the heavy cauldron and stepped into the speeder, precariously holding it. It wasn’t the best mode of transportation, but they had little choice for now. Altair glanced over at Clove, “Don’t drive too recklessly, Wheels,” He said with a smile, one that didn’t quite reach his eyes, “I’m heat proof, but you ain’t. Don’t want this sloshing around on ya,” Altair gazed ahead.

He was silent as they took off. Things felt different with her now. She was the same person, but she also wasn’t. There were layers of complications there that didn’t exist before. But in the end, he was still happy to be here with her. Altair glanced her way after a moment, “So…” He began quietly, “Did you witness the…whole thing with the parachute and the Wookiees and them being strapped to a starfighter?” It was a testament to how much he cared for her that he asked this without snickering. As tragic as the story was, it was absolutely bizarre and almost comically ridiculous.

@LilyNion