Cadaiv Niopa

[cadaiv_niopa]

Name: Cadaiv Niopa

Faction: Jedi

Rank: Jedi Knight

Species:Human

Homeworld:Chandrilla

Age:19

Height: 5'6"

Weight: 120lbs

Eyes: indigo

Hair: Color:jet black. Style: unkept

Distinguishing Marks: N/A

Dominate Hand: He is fully ambidextrous.

Force Sensitive: yes

Strength: below average 4/10

Dexteity: He is deadly, fast, and precise 10/10

Constitution: average 5/10

Intelligence: average 5/10

Wisdon: he lacks in wisdom to inexperience 3/10

Charisma: quite charasmatic 7/10

Lightsaber forms: quite adept in shiem. Prefers to fight with two sabers.

Strenghts and weaknesses: what he lacks in strength he makes up for in agility.

Gear: simple padawan brown padawn robes and twin blue lightsabers

Personnailty: commpassionate strong willed selfless and caring but also impatient are some of the words used to describle Cadaiv.He is a cunning opponent in battle but his abilities make him over confident in himself. He is eager to prove himself and that eagerness has almost gotten him killed on serveral occasions

History: he was born bakura and his pilots were killed by intergalatic pirates the jedi took him in and since then the jedi have been the only family hes had

 

[Ru the Boatswain]

Needs a longer history.

 

[Kaeb]

Needs a longer history.

MUCH LONGER, history.

 

[DhehKappa]

Needs a longer history.

MUCH LONGER, history.

Indeed. Not only that, I don't think you can start off as a Jedi Knight, you need to start off as padawan. I'd give this profile a big brush up and get some more details specially on the Personality and in the History section, and on the other areas some more detail wouldn't be too bad, I guess.

 

[Jiang Winters]

Needs a longer history.

MUCH LONGER, history.

Ru and Kaeb speak the truth. Sit down and spend some quality time with the profile to shape it up.

There's a few little spelling and proper grammar errors too, so you might also want to cut and paste the whole profile into Microsoft Works Word Processor, or any good word processor with a spell checker, and have the program check your spelling.

And after using a ":" anywhere in the profile, always put a space in after it, to separate it from whatever information follows. Makes everything much cleaner and easier to read, IMO.

Indeed. Not only that, I don't think you can start off as a Jedi Knight, you need to start off as padawan. I'd give this profile a big brush up and get some more details specially on the Personality and in the History section, and on the other areas some more detail wouldn't be too bad, I guess.

Oh, yeah, and Enekappa hit the nail on the head about the Jedi-related stuff.
From what I understand, the only way you can start off with the knowledge of lightsaber combat forms and a rank beyond that of 'Hopeful' in the Jedi Order, is if you get permission from Matt.

 

[cadaiv_niopa]

srry i was gonna continue but i had to stop ill work on it mre