Dream within Dreams

[TweedPawn]

The planet of Sacul no longer had a chill to it. The snap that indicated autum was arriving to the plains was no longer as quick or sharp as it had been in the past. The scientists declared it a climate change, the end of a modern ice age. The animals were becoming more tame, more predictable. The burdens of the people focused to the bright shining star of the future, content to finally make their mark.

The plainsfolk lived their lives as usual, including Della Frey and her family. She had brought back another galactic, but one who had so much of his past hidden from her. Yet, he claimed to be Lain's father. The children trusted him, and they were rarely wrong.

The grass was fading to golden colors. The herds were moving south, and the predators with them. Sogar, more than others, had adjusted so quickly to life amongst the Snamreg. Della herself was still struggling. A part of her worried so much for her people. It worried about some sort of impending meeting. It wasn't doom, but it was heavy.

Like the worrisome mother, Della watched her children from afar under the peach tree that was planted decades ago.

 

[Black Noise]

Sogar slowly made his towards where Della Frey, a woman he considered his daughter just as much as Laine, stood watching the little ones play underneath a peach tree. Laine was among them, teaching them to conceal themselves in the force so that they could not be seen. Neither of the little ones possessed the skill to do so, but their attempts were entertaining to watch.

Focusing, Sogar absent-mindedly wondered how long he had been blind in his left eye. The old scar from a lightsaber wound he received decades had caused him to lose his sight, this was clear, however, why was it that Sogar only noticed it a few days after they landed on Sacul? A Snamreg had tried to get his attention and the old Iktotchi couldn't see him. The Snamreg were a wonderful lot, thought the old being, a quiet, well educated group that protected their own and cherished their families. He felt right at home here. A few regarded him tentatively at first, which was understandable, but his horns and other-worldly appearance was quickly written off by Della as a skin condition; they believed her. Ever since they landed, Sogar put behind his old life and focused entirely on his new family, as well as spending many hours alone with Laine.

Laine, Lain, Nora, so many faces to that little girl. Sogar knew more about her than he felt he even should. Withholding knowledge from her was not difficult, he knew she was not, nor would ever be, ready to hear most of her life. Laine was happy, married, and wanted nothing more than to spend the rest of her life playing with Sogar's grandchildren, Della's children. He would not ruin that for her.

Approaching Della, he smiled, waving half-heartedly. He couldn't raise his lightsaber arm very high, his muscles seized and gave him pain. Strange, he thought, they didn't used to do that, must be something in the air. Calling out, Sogar said, "Hello! How are you?" It did not take a powerful Jedi to tell Della was not comfortable. Laine had expressed a helplessness to Sogar when it came to times like this, and Sogar doubted he could do any better than her if he spoke to Della. However, he would certainly try.

Sitting in the tall grass and breathing deep of the still warmed air, Sogar began speaking, "You know, when I was young, I spent most of my life on Zoist. Zoist, I used to love that world. Every morning began with an ice blizzard, every evening the sun was blotted out by dark clouds and walls of snow. I would hole up in a cold temple, reading cold books, eating cold food, leading a cold life." Brushing the grass, he continued, "But I don't regret it, because it game me an appreciation for the little things, like weeds, and grass, the warmth of the sun, the cool of the rain. These are things I went for years without, I don't know how I survived." The last bit wasn't entirely true, he survived because his hatred had been stronger than any other acolyte's. But that was irrelevant, a past life he'd never go back to.

"I think you understand what I mean." Sogar finished, chuckling gently as he gazed out of one good eye towards the children under the peach tree.

 

[TweedPawn]

Della's first gesture was to help the aging jedi become comfortable. Having Sogar around brought back memories that Gaunerei almost destroyed. Sebastian...Solborne. The one she named her son after. Shi Gel Hu, the one who found her. Della never could find a way to explain how he looked to her children, at least in the best way her memory would allow.

"I am fine." she said in response to Sogar's greeting. Strange, he seemed to be aging so quickly. Della dismissed it as the result of Sacul's harsh life. But even Sacul seemed easier to live on these days, though she couldn't precisely figure out why. She listened to Sogar's kind words, and the gentle rolling of the Basic tongue. She contemplated for a moment, piecing together the abstracts parts of her mind.

"I understand. I remember being so far away from here once, but with no way to come back. I felt like I was trapped in a dream, unable to wake up. When I was a padawan, I would lie in bed and try to pretend my family was so close. But, even my master shunned close bonds. He was so distant. I wish I knew why. I would think of these blue quiet skies, and these fields. I missed everything so much."

"but yet, I feel torn."

 

[Black Noise]

Sogar nodded gently, listening to Della as he gazed out on the golden plains. When Della finished, the old Iktotchi waited, sitting in silence. He did not do so because he could not think up a reply, but rather to provide physical presence support without the need for words. However, after a few moments, he did speak up with his tone taking an unprecedented darkness. It was a cold, truthful sort of tone, the one you'd use to denote something serious that you wish were not so.

"You and I, we're different. I never let anyone close, not before, not now. On one hand, I can count those for whom I care for. Of them, four are before me, the last is dead. The last, he was the first person I ever trusted. He gave me hope to believe in something, Ruthric wanted to change the galaxy. Even long after I lost him his hope stayed within me, tearing me up. My loyalties were torn between my own life goals and the ones I knew I wanted more, to be something more."

Breathing deep, he lightened up and continued, "You've already changed the galaxy, Della Frey. Whether you know it or not, this galaxy is a better place because you exist. I know what you feel, you are like a puzzle whose pieces have been scattered across the galaxy. Before you are only a few pieces, important pieces to be sure, but they do not form the whole picture that you make up. The other pieces are out there, still in the greater beyond. It's up to you to decide whether or not to be satisfied with the pieces you have here, or to go back and finish what you've begun."

Slowly, Sogar leaned forward and gripping his knees, forcing himself to stand as he continued speaking, "Whatever you wish to do, remember this. You're important, with every life you've encountered, you've touched them, changed them for the better. Without you-" Sogar looked out to Laine, far off in the distance, smiling and laughing, "Without you, I know of one life that would not exist for certain. I've seen her mind, she would have killed herself a long time ago." Looking right at Della, he finished, "You changed her fate, I think it's for the better, don't you?"