The camera would pull back, revealing the dastardly dashing Rich Magnum, clad in his usual wear, he sat behind his desk with a sly grin. "Hello, Rich Magnum here, with Magnum P.I. Last time you saw me, I had a special treat for the ladies of the galaxy. But don't think I forgot about you guys out there! So this goes to the pervs of the galaxy. The guys that really only enjoy the finer assets of their gorgeous counterparts. So, without further ado, the foxy felines of the galaxy and no, we're not talking house pets or Cathar, because hairballs are not hot." He would say with a laugh and a nearly award winning grin.
"So, just like the for the ladies, I endured blistering winds, scorching deserts, tall towers, and even some gender confused Shistavanen at a skin party. You.. do not want to know. Anyways, I interviewed three hundred sickos out of a line of like forty times that and even put out a galaxy wide poll, which I had to close after the system broke several times. That's right folks, the spank banks came out. So, I did what any sane person would do, I filtered through and cleared out votes on pornstars, child actors, some really weird gelatinous creatures, and even a deceased Hutt! Like I said, sickos. So this list should come as no surprise to those that continue watching and with the volume, we're going to take this list to ten, so bear with me. At number ten, we got @Julia Hipori a woman with a big mouth who isn't afraid to use it. Honestly, I am surprised she was one of the few politicians to make it this high. But as far as I go, I'd do it just to be disappeared for scandal." He would say with a grin as an image of the politician in question would appear, some of the images are her yelling.. or being impassioned. "Number nine, now this was a big shock to me. Nobody knows these ladies names, but just look at those assets." An image would appear of two female Mandalorians escorting some politician ( @Minerva Wren @Reiel Mal Crowholde ) "I mean just look at the weaponry, the armor. Now those are two ladies that will fold you like a pretzel. I don't even need to see the faces to say 'Yes, please.'" Another pause as he took a sip from his galss. "Next up at number eight, @Queen Parnelli , so can I get a 'Yaaas Queen!' and I mean the fact she didn't make it higher is just proof you guys are sickos with some odd fantasies. Look at this beauty, regal, refined, and carries so much power she can literally banish you to her sex dungeon, so that is a swipe right. And following the Queen into spot number seven is.. Let me just pause real quick, you guys are really showing love to the law enforcement, so number seven.. @Trys Aran . I mean look at that razor focus. That is a woman that I would allow to bend me over the table just because she wants to try it." He would laugh a bit to take another sip from his glass.
"Flying into number six is Sector Ranger @Bast Emblai , a former applicant to the harem of Ranger Velt. I'm not sure if it's that or the badge, but either way, she can definitely use the cuffs on me, any day." Images of Bast would flash with her at the bar with Corran and another unnamed Ranger. "Number five, the final politician on the list Governor Alyse Ti'varnus of Bakura. Hopefully this blonde, just wants to have fun." the image of her would flash by with a zeltron in a slave outfit with a veiled military advisor standing beside the two. "Who am I kidding? Look at that escort!"
Rich would take a deep breath to drain his glass "And we're back to the final countdown. The top four, the foxxiest felines that are not actually felines. At number now personally, I would put this one higher on the list. @Lyra Durand ." For this one, arrest photos of the sith captured at Byblos would flash on the screen. "I mean, she could be walking aggressively towards me, and I would take that Force choke and ask for some more!"
"Alrighty gents, number three! Jedi Master @Alexandria Voran. I mean she tries to hide the curves beneath the robe, but we know better. Ain't nothing slipping past all the pervs that voted for you, baby. And now, the illustrious two-spot. This one I actually should have though would have been number one, but the fetishes won out. So here we are, @Dr Ilana Morata . This vote is the obvious triple threat, brains, beauty, and bodacious curves. Sure, you could lop the last two together, but some things just need to be repeated. She has the regality to rival every single politician or royal in the list and the fashion to back it up." Images of the doctor would flash from her most recent appearances. "Now there are a lot of rumors going about that she is dating the four spot from the mens list and the three spot from this list. So.. I guess beauty travels together?" Another laugh before he looked sternly at the camera. "Now then.. The moment you disgusting cretins have been waiting for, the final fill for the spank bank. So all the ladies in this list, I apologize. But at number one, we have the beautiful dancer, @Alisaah Tila . Not much is known about this exotic beauty, but she has been seen on Zeltros or Huttball games moving her body and with it, eliciting the most primal of desires in men across the galaxy. It's even rumored that she shot down becoming a dancer for President Thorne. But slave or not, I gotta agree, she is absolutely stunning. And I am happy I didn't read any of the comments that accompanied her votes."
Rich would go ahead and refill his glass. "Now, for some honorable mentions." The screen would flash to @Izel Thral "Apparently this.. hot piece of carapace is making waves on Thyferra as that is where ninety-nine point eight percent of her votes came from. I think she's a Jedi, but I got sources saying she was in Playbug Magazines. And lemme tell ya, I too am only hearing about this for the first time. Next honorable mention is well.. this unknown woman. We couldn't get a name... but maybe, she's just gaining the notoriety from traveling with Sector Hunk Corran Velt. The image would flick to one of a dark haired woman walking beside Corran. "Look at that, the Core's Ass accompanied by another great ass. I need to move on before this really gets crass. Either way, the two honorable mentions are also supposedly members of Sector Hunks Harem as both have been sighted with him on Coruscant.
He would drain his glass in one sip. "Ladies, you know I love you and I am sorry for the graphic content shown here. Don't worry, we'll get these pervs next time! Anyways, this is Rich Magnum, the P.I is out!"
The camera would pull back before the feed cut.
"So, just like the for the ladies, I endured blistering winds, scorching deserts, tall towers, and even some gender confused Shistavanen at a skin party. You.. do not want to know. Anyways, I interviewed three hundred sickos out of a line of like forty times that and even put out a galaxy wide poll, which I had to close after the system broke several times. That's right folks, the spank banks came out. So, I did what any sane person would do, I filtered through and cleared out votes on pornstars, child actors, some really weird gelatinous creatures, and even a deceased Hutt! Like I said, sickos. So this list should come as no surprise to those that continue watching and with the volume, we're going to take this list to ten, so bear with me. At number ten, we got @Julia Hipori a woman with a big mouth who isn't afraid to use it. Honestly, I am surprised she was one of the few politicians to make it this high. But as far as I go, I'd do it just to be disappeared for scandal." He would say with a grin as an image of the politician in question would appear, some of the images are her yelling.. or being impassioned. "Number nine, now this was a big shock to me. Nobody knows these ladies names, but just look at those assets." An image would appear of two female Mandalorians escorting some politician ( @Minerva Wren @Reiel Mal Crowholde ) "I mean just look at the weaponry, the armor. Now those are two ladies that will fold you like a pretzel. I don't even need to see the faces to say 'Yes, please.'" Another pause as he took a sip from his galss. "Next up at number eight, @Queen Parnelli , so can I get a 'Yaaas Queen!' and I mean the fact she didn't make it higher is just proof you guys are sickos with some odd fantasies. Look at this beauty, regal, refined, and carries so much power she can literally banish you to her sex dungeon, so that is a swipe right. And following the Queen into spot number seven is.. Let me just pause real quick, you guys are really showing love to the law enforcement, so number seven.. @Trys Aran . I mean look at that razor focus. That is a woman that I would allow to bend me over the table just because she wants to try it." He would laugh a bit to take another sip from his glass.
"Flying into number six is Sector Ranger @Bast Emblai , a former applicant to the harem of Ranger Velt. I'm not sure if it's that or the badge, but either way, she can definitely use the cuffs on me, any day." Images of Bast would flash with her at the bar with Corran and another unnamed Ranger. "Number five, the final politician on the list Governor Alyse Ti'varnus of Bakura. Hopefully this blonde, just wants to have fun." the image of her would flash by with a zeltron in a slave outfit with a veiled military advisor standing beside the two. "Who am I kidding? Look at that escort!"
Rich would take a deep breath to drain his glass "And we're back to the final countdown. The top four, the foxxiest felines that are not actually felines. At number now personally, I would put this one higher on the list. @Lyra Durand ." For this one, arrest photos of the sith captured at Byblos would flash on the screen. "I mean, she could be walking aggressively towards me, and I would take that Force choke and ask for some more!"
"Alrighty gents, number three! Jedi Master @Alexandria Voran. I mean she tries to hide the curves beneath the robe, but we know better. Ain't nothing slipping past all the pervs that voted for you, baby. And now, the illustrious two-spot. This one I actually should have though would have been number one, but the fetishes won out. So here we are, @Dr Ilana Morata . This vote is the obvious triple threat, brains, beauty, and bodacious curves. Sure, you could lop the last two together, but some things just need to be repeated. She has the regality to rival every single politician or royal in the list and the fashion to back it up." Images of the doctor would flash from her most recent appearances. "Now there are a lot of rumors going about that she is dating the four spot from the mens list and the three spot from this list. So.. I guess beauty travels together?" Another laugh before he looked sternly at the camera. "Now then.. The moment you disgusting cretins have been waiting for, the final fill for the spank bank. So all the ladies in this list, I apologize. But at number one, we have the beautiful dancer, @Alisaah Tila . Not much is known about this exotic beauty, but she has been seen on Zeltros or Huttball games moving her body and with it, eliciting the most primal of desires in men across the galaxy. It's even rumored that she shot down becoming a dancer for President Thorne. But slave or not, I gotta agree, she is absolutely stunning. And I am happy I didn't read any of the comments that accompanied her votes."
Rich would go ahead and refill his glass. "Now, for some honorable mentions." The screen would flash to @Izel Thral "Apparently this.. hot piece of carapace is making waves on Thyferra as that is where ninety-nine point eight percent of her votes came from. I think she's a Jedi, but I got sources saying she was in Playbug Magazines. And lemme tell ya, I too am only hearing about this for the first time. Next honorable mention is well.. this unknown woman. We couldn't get a name... but maybe, she's just gaining the notoriety from traveling with Sector Hunk Corran Velt. The image would flick to one of a dark haired woman walking beside Corran. "Look at that, the Core's Ass accompanied by another great ass. I need to move on before this really gets crass. Either way, the two honorable mentions are also supposedly members of Sector Hunks Harem as both have been sighted with him on Coruscant.
He would drain his glass in one sip. "Ladies, you know I love you and I am sorry for the graphic content shown here. Don't worry, we'll get these pervs next time! Anyways, this is Rich Magnum, the P.I is out!"
The camera would pull back before the feed cut.
@Sreeya @GABA @Bex @Nefieslab @Minuteman75 @Forsythe Crowholde @Nor'baal @Kestrel @Topher @Valen Pelora @Killa Ree @Charndley @Reyn
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