How ****ed are you?

[Sovereign]

My glasses are trying to rape me. I have a tissue to fight it off.

someone's going to get some lovin'

 

[Samara]

someone's going to get some lovin'

If paper beats rock in rock paper sisors, I've got a chance (I was never sure of how that worked anyways. Does the paper suffocates the rock?)

 

[Sreeya]

I'm about to be assaulted by a fuzzy sock, so I defend with a box of tampons.

 

[Sovereign]

you keep your tampons close

 

[Lucid]

to my right there is a pile of clean clothes on a chair.

to my left there is a lamp.

lamp wins.

 

[Veritas et Lux]

the wall grew a face and is trying to rape me... i have a christmas tree to my left

... That wall's a pussy

 

[Jiang Winters]

An empty plastic cup has sprouted legs and has its rapeface on.

My weapon is a couple rolls of christmas-y wrapping paper.

I'm not really comfortable with these odds...

 

[Sovereign]

An empty plastic cup has sprouted legs and has its rapeface on.

My weapon is a couple rolls of christmas-y wrapping paper.

I'm not really comfortable with these odds...

someone is going to get loved tenderly

 

[Shiuzu]

I've got a glass of rum and coke to my left. And a computer to my right...i hope my computer is an easy drunk.

 

[Prancing Yawn]

My Luke Skywalker Mighty Mugg's eyes are bloodthirsty for some Force Thrusting. I shall defend my persons with a stuffed moose.

 

[Sovereign]

My Luke Skywalker Mighty Mugg's eyes are bloodthirsty for some Force Thrusting. I shall defend my persons with a stuffed moose.

Your anal virginity shall be preserved.

...For now.

 

[Empress]

My naginata is still wanting more....

This time however I have my stuffed Weisheng plushy in his smexy jedi robes...

damnit, the least the blade could do was buy me dinner first

 

[Fusion]

Now that I'm in Florida, a printer is trying to rape me with an office light and a cup of water. I have a box of staples, a lamp, my phone, and a copier to fight it with.

 

[Nirvana]

okay what do I got now, a army water bottle that is trying to rape me. And my weapon to defend me with, is a wallet.

not bad, not bad at all.

 

[Rev]

Headset to left, pop bottle to right..

I really dont know what to think.

 

[Michael Scott]

to the right of me I have a can of Chunky N.E. Clam Chowder from Campbell's.
To the left of me I have my turquoise 4GB flash drive.

But since this is the interweb, I pull open the tab up top and pour the soup into a pot that is on the stove and therefore it becomes my dinner. The hunter became the hunted.

 

[Wing]

My M-4 is trying to rape me, and I have lingerie to help fight it off.

 

[Natise]

A rancor figure is trying to rape me and I have a curtain rod to fight it off, I like my odds.

 

[Ninjedi]

My door is trying to rape me and I have headphones to fight it off.

****.

 

[Black Noise]

A shower rod is trying to rape me and I havr toilet paper to fight it off.

I'm screwed.