I am Ghost

[D.C.]

I AM GHOST
CORUSCANT, LOWER CITY​

I just need to understand what’s going on… I need a place to lay low, and think of what’s happened… Maybe I’ll remember after a while… O, but kriff… this scares me so!

Stars twinkled in the cold night sky, but none of them could be seen because it was a cloudy night. A lonesome figure, dressed in a dark-grey cloak, sauntered down an alley. He was lost; he didn’t know where to go. He was lost… mentally. Every time he tried to remember, it was as if his memories were blocked… or had been erased.

My name… he thought. Who am I? What’s my name?

He stopped for a moment. He let the rain pour down on him. It didn’t matter if he got soaking wet. His wounds had healed too, so maybe he couldn’t get sick either. And even if he’d get sick, would anyone care?

Maybe…

Maybe there were some people out there, who were now searching high and low for him, anxiously. He looked up to the dark sky. The raindrops crashed onto his pale face. His bronze eyes glistened as tears ran down his cheeks. What if there really were people out there who cared for him? And what if they’d find him, and he couldn’t remember who they were.

No, he thought to himself. I will remember them if they’re loved ones.

But he knew full well—although at the same time he wondered how he could knows this—that he wouldn’t remember anything. Even if he’d meet people he used to know; used to love… Even then, he would not remember their familiar faces. It was all gone. His memories, all gone.

‘Who am I…’ he whispered to the Creator, who’d probably now look down on him with a sad face. ‘A name… I need a name…’ Ironically enough; he wasn’t even sure if he really believed in the Creator, but he felt like he needed the support.

He tore his gaze from the sky and looked in front of himself again. The alley was up ahead. It was dark, and it looked somewhat scary, but he knew that he didn’t have to fear anyone. Somehow, the blue, weird lightning cracked around his fist again. He stared at it. No… he didn’t have to fear anyone. He could stand his ground, even when an army of thugs would attack him.

Slowly he walked on, trying to remember, but failed miserably. It was all in vain… or so it seemed.

They called me Patient 73757 in the hospital… Those doctors did… he thought. But that’s not a name… That’s not a name… I need a name… I want to know my name…

He’d reached the end of the alley. The night was cold and dark, and he was completely soaked by the rain that kept on pouring down from the grey clouds. He looked to the right, but saw no-one. He looked to the left… and saw no-one.

For a desperate moment there, he felt like the last man in the galaxy. As if all other inhabitants had gone, and left him behind. He was a man without a past now, a lonesome man, looking to regain his memories.

Yet at the same time, he was afraid. Maybe he was better off not knowing who he was.

So, to the left or to the right. He chose the left. Why, he didn’t know, but did it matter? As a matter of fact; no, it didn’t. I didn’t matter at all. He could walk in any random direction. He was lost somewhere in the lower city of Coruscant. He didn’t know where to go, and besides, he didn’t even know who he was. He wasn’t careless; but choosing a direction didn’t mean anything to him.

He walked down a dark street, only vaguely lit by some street lanterns. It was as if the street was abandoned.

I’m tired… he thought. I need a place to sleep…

He sauntered onwards. The way he looked out of his eyes, and the way he walked, made him look like he didn’t care about the world anymore, but in fact he did. Just not right now.

At the end of the dark street stood a building. The Patient stopped in front of it, and looked up. It was three stories high. Most of the windows were shattered, or covered with dust so it’d be impossible to look through it. It was an abandoned building, he could easily tell. He closed his bronze eyes for a moment and took a deep breath. Then—he didn’t know how he did it—he felt a strange feeling. And a moment later he felt… emptiness. It was as if that feeling told him that no-one was inside. It was strange, but at the same time he trusted it, for some reason he didn’t even know.

Slowly he approached the old, wooden front door. He opened it and slipped inside.

He walked down the small hall, and slipped through the second door at the end. He entered into, what he assumed was, the living room. It was completely empty though, it looked like it’d been abandoned for ages. It was an eerie place too, but the Patient couldn’t tell why. He had the feeling someone, or something, was standing right behind him; watching him. But when he turned around, with slugthrower pistol in hand, there was nothing.

He shuddered.

The Patient walked towards the far corner of the room, and just when he wanted to sit down, a shock went through his body when he saw something written on the wall. Graffiti. It were eerie words.

I AM GHOST​

‘I am Ghost…’ the Patient whispered. His heart pounded. ‘I am Ghost…’

He carefully touched the words, as if they could give him an electric shock if he wasn’t careful enough. Ghost. He was Ghost. A fitting name for a man without a past or an identity. A fitting name for a lost soul.

He sat down, with his back against the wall. He felt cold. He felt alone. He lied down on his left shoulder, folding his hands together and placing them under his cheek. He curled up and stared across the room. He was so tired.

So… tired…

He yawned, then closed his eyes. Slowly, despite the horrors of that day, he drifted into sleep. A single thought echoed through his mind as he drifted away.

I am Ghost…

 

[Denzein]

The man fell asleep with a final miserable thought, and a wave of emotion swept through the young knight that had been tailing him for the last ten minutes. She had been on her way back to the temple after an errand and had felt his confused fear through the force they both shared... She couldn’t have just left him alone. The Jedi taught impartiality, but she had always disagreed with that of all their tenets. It might be within her power to help him, so she felt obliged to try.

He had almost caught her once, spinning around with pistol in hand. She’d reacted quickly, leaping up into the rafters of the lonely building with skill and silence she had learned from a young age, taught by a tutor that outmatched any Jedi. She hadn’t made a sound, and he’d assumed it was Nothing. She felt a tiny flutter of pride deep within her bosom.

Once she was sure he was sleeping deeply she swung down from the beam she was perching on with all the lightness of a mote of dust, landing like a cat. She stared at the man lying on the floor before her. He was a pitiful thing... She wondered what his story was, why he was here, why he was so unbelievably confused. Had he lost his mind? He was certainly intriguing enough.

Father would know.

She sat cross legged, and resolved to wait for him to wake up by himself. She exuded her usual peaceful, calming aura in the force, so saturated in what many perceived to be the lightside. She hoped it’d help his dreams.

The waiting began.

 

[D.C.]

He didn't dream, for there was nothing to dream about. His mind was empty, as was his soul, as was his past. It was all blacked out, and without his memories, he couldn't dream. Or... maybe he did dream after all...

It was a waste land. He sauntered about, looking for any sign of life. Of civilization. But there wasn't any. Nothing. There was nothing... Except for... a bird. A raven flying through the dark sky, and it was as if that raven wanted him to follow. So, in his dream, he followed.

He was wearing the grey cloak he'd found that night, and he was holding the pistol. The raven flew onwards, and he followed. His bronze eyes fixed on the bird, because if he'd lose the bird, then he'd be trapped in here forever. Or so it seemed.

Then, up ahead on the waste land, there stood a figure. When he got closer he could see it was a young woman, and upon reaching her he could see her face, but only briefly. A pretty face, but when he tried to ask her something, she vanished.

The following moment the clouds packed together and it began to rain. Thunder roared in the sky, the raven was gone.

He was shocked, because he was lost now.

Awaken...

He looked up to the sky. Who was telling him to awaken? And how could he just awaken?

Slowly, the world became darker, as if all light died out. And finally, it was as if he was floating in a black empty space. He closed his eyes and he was afraid. Afraid of what would happen. Was he dead? Or was it just a nightmare...?

----

His eyes were open and he was back in the living room, where he fell asleep. He frowned, and for a moment he couldn't remember how he got here. For a moment, he couldn't remember anything, anymore. But then he remembered. Of course, everything before the hospital was still a mystery to him, but he remembered how he fled from the hospital; how he killed those thugs; and how he ended up in this building.

It was only three hours later.

She sat before him, and he was shocked to see that her face was the same as that of the figure he'd seen in his dream. Or was it? He couldn't be sure, because he had not seen the figure clearly.

He reached for his gun and aimed it at her. He was obviously afraid.

'Who are you?' he managed to bring out.

 

[Denzein]

Eleanor blinked once when he pulled the gun up to defend himself, she had expected him to. She kept on emanating soothing energy, looking him in the eyes and acting as if the gun didn't exist. Her eyes were wide, and full of pity.

It was the least she could do to try.

"I'm Eleanor. I want to help you, if you'll let me... Do you know your name?"

The rain pattered off the roof. It was audible, and it filled the void between them. It was like music, so full of passion... And yet so cold. The rain had killed more than the Jedi or the Bogan or the Republic or the Hutts or any disease in the world ever had, simply by deciding not to fall. It wasn't relevant, but it helped her to think about pointless things when she was trying to help someone else.

It took her mind off it.

 

[D.C.]

His name...?

73757 lowered the gun and glanced at this Eleanor for a while, curiously, but also a little bit shocked. Then he sat up, very slowly. He pointed at the grafitti on the wall and said: 'I can't remember... so I took this as my new name... I am "Ghost"...'

He frowned, as if he was trying to understand something that was simply too complex too understand. As if he was thinking hard to figure something out. Then he looked back to her. He recognized the robes she was wearing.

'Are... are you a Jedi, miss Eleanor?' he asked. If she was, then he probably didn't have anything to fear from her. If she wasn't, he'd raise his gun again.

 

[Denzein]

The went down and secretly Eleanor rejoiced... Her thirst wasn't strong, she had just been fed not an hour beforehand. She wouldn't have had a good enough alibi for his death had it come to violence.

He was so confused... This poor soul had no choice but to steal a name from some idiot's graffiti. If ever a man needed help, he did. She nodded reassuringly, not making any sudden movements. Her lips turned into a kindly smile.

"I am a Jedi Knight, mr Ghost. Can you remember anything? Anything at all?"

 

[D.C.]

'Remember...?' Ghost closed his eyes for a while and rubbed his head. 'No... it's as if... as if my memory's been wiped clean. I can't remember a thing. Nothing. As if I have no past. You are a Jedi... can you help me? I'm... I'm scared as hell...'

And he was scared. Oh so scared. He didn't know what to do, or where he was. He didn't know anything. But at the same time he did know things. He possessed amazing 'powers', but those powers also frightened him. He had reflexes of a warrior, and that too scared him. Who was he? Who!?

 

[Denzein]

Eleanor's large eyes betrayed her feelings of pity for Ghost, as well as the overwhelming sense of helplessness she was unable to hide. He was so beyond her power to help it wasn't even funny... If only Father were here, he'd know what to do. It was just Ghost's bad luck that he'd left the planet not an hour past. Oh well. Eleanor had a second best option, and it seemed they were needed.

"I can help you, mr. Ghost, if you come with me to the Temple... Can you do that? They can help you there I promise."

 

[D.C.]

'The Temple...' he said. 'The Temple where the Jedi reside? They can help me?' He didn't give a straight answer yet, for he was lost in doubt. Maybe they could really help him, and restore his memory. Maybe they could save him. Or maybe they'd harm him. But what if they would hurt him? Would it matter? He had nothing to lose, so perhaps he'd just go with Eleanor and maybe everything would get better.

He was just so... confused.

'Can you imagine what it's like?' he asked. He spoke with the voice of a terrified man. A man lost in the shadows. A man who didn't know where the **** he was or who the **** he was. 'Well, I can't... I... it's like I'm...' He didn't know how to say what he felt. He just didn't know what to say.

'Ok...' he finally whispered, looking straight into her eyes. 'Ok, Eleanor. Maybe you should take me there. Maybe it's my only chance... Please...' The poor man's eyes were fixed on her, he never looked away, as if he was looking for a sign that'd tell him she'd betray him. As if he was trying to see in her eyes whether she was speaking the truth or not. Well, maybe he did try to see it in her eyes, but then he wasn't aware of that. There were so many things he wasn't aware of. So many things he could do. So many things he'd done...

'Th—thank you...' he whispered.

 

[Denzein]

"Come on then, it's getting onto early morning already. Can you walk?"

She knew the answer, but the question seemed necessary. It made her feel as if she was more in control of the situation. The more in control she was, the more she was going to be able to calm down Ghost, and that was all that mattered.

She stood, waiting for him to do the same. Once he did she'd get on the commlink for a pick up, if Ghost agreed to one. It was never a good idea to go walking in the lower city during the small hours of the night...

 

[D.C.]

'Y—yes,' Ghost stammered, 'I'll walk. Is it far to the Temple? And how can they help me?'

Very slowly he stood up, because if he would stand up too quickly, he was afraid he'd get dizzy. He didn't know why, he just felt like that. But it wasn't that strange actually; some people get dizzy when they stand up too quickly after waking up.

He was taller than her, and so he had to look down a bit to see her face. He was still shaking, and he thought that was because he was hungry. The truth is, he had not fed for days. He was very hungry, and it showed.

The Patient glanced at her, curiously, waiting for her to answer his questions or to lead him to the Temple. It didn't matter if she answered the questions or not, because he'd find out the answers himself, eventually. He thought he'd heard good things about Jedi, but then again; he couldn't be sure if he really heard good things about them in the past, or if this was all just a... what? A dream? No, that's not the right word...

To Ghost, this was all very strange and he just didn't understand this all. It's really hard to explain what the man was going through...

He shuddered from the cold and crossed his arms in front of his chest. He rubbed his arms, trying to warm himself. It was still raining outside and it probably wouldn't stop soon.

 

[Denzein]

Eleanor smiled as he stood, relieved despite having watched him stagger into the building. He desire to walk was worrying, but perhaps he could be won over with the offer of the lift. He did seem tired... Perhaps he'd accept it just to avoid the walk.

She had to try.

"It's a long way, too far to walk by miles. It's a half hour speeder ride... I can contact the Temple if you want and arrange a pick up?"

 

[D.C.]

'I don't want to walk...' he admitted. 'Right now I'm completely lost, so wherever it is you'll take me, how we get there and what happens to me is of no importance... I just don't wanna walk because... 'cause I'll collapse... I'm so weary... and I don't even know why.'

((OOC: lol only dialogue, didn't know what else to say. It's time we get out of that building =D ))

 

[Denzein]

Eleanor nodded, relieved. She produced her commlink almost as if she'd ben expecting (or even hoping) he'd agree, and tapped in speed-dial 2. Within the space of a few seconds she was having a hushed, speedy conversation with the receiver.

"What do you mean 'not safe'? Of course it's risky... Yes! We're Jedi for Nothing's sake! No... That was meaningless drivel... Yes... Of course I want what I called for, great, thanks. See you then."

She hung up and glanced at Ghost apologetically. The Jedi could be real health-and-safety nerf-herders at times.

"Let's wait outside, get some new scenery. He'll be here soon, he's going to meet us at a Jedi meeting spot just down the road. Come on, friend."

She smiled and held out her hand in an alarming display of the innocence that Eleanor Day was made of. She was the embodiment of purity, like an angel without wings. Tonight she was compassion.

 

[D.C.]

Ghost slowly reached out a shaking hand. He placed his hand in hers and let her lead him outside. She'd called him 'friend', and he just wasn't sure what to think of that. How could she call him a friend if she didn't even know who he was? He didn't even know who he was himself... And again he shuddered. What if he was a bad man?

Outside it'd just stopped raining (thankfully). There were a few pools in the dark street. It was still nighttime. The Patient could hear the sounds of airspeeders in the far distance, even though they were far away from the bustling city that was Coruscant. They were in a dark area, where only few went.

But dispite all his doubts, confusion and fear; he was actually glad that she came along. She was a Jedi after all, or at least, she claimed to be one. There was something about her though, as if some kind of energy radiated from her body. He didn't know how to explain this, and he didn't understand this, but it somehow convinced him that she was indeed a Jedi.

Finally they stopped at the meeting point, where the Jedi would pick them up. Slowly he let go of her hand and looked around the area anxiously. As if he was afraid of something. They were still in that dark area, but here the buildings were a bit further away from each other, so the speeder would have some space to land.

'How long will they take to get here?' Ghost asked. He didn't sound impatient or anything, but rather curious. He realized it might've also sounded a bit as if he demanded an answer, so he quickly added: 'Can you please tell me?' He looked at her with such a serious look on his face it might've looked funny.

 

[Denzein]

They didn't speak as she led him outside to the meeting point. She preferred to let him contemplate: Any memories he could dredge up would help the Jedi healers greatly later on. She was just bitter she couldn't help him herself.

Hellsk had been on a routine patrol of the lower city when she'd called. He wouldn't be long, a few minutes was her guess. She was going to have to watch him though... He tended to gun the throttle a little too much when he thought something was an emergency, which was rash. Ghost would still be alive when they reached the temple if the speed limit was regarded - she decided she would have to watch him, too.

They reached the meeting point with little incident. Ghost extricated his hand from hers with a fearful expression on his face. Eleanor wasn't surprised, she'd be scared too if she forgot everything about herself.

"Not long. A few minutes, give or take. He was doing a patrol when I called, and his route clips this area of the city. He'll be here soon."

She gave him a sidelong look, clearly worrying about him.

"What are you afraid of? You're safe, I'm with you."

 

[D.C.]

'I'm afraid of,' he said, 'everything. I can't help but feel depressed. It's... I don't know what it is. I feel miserable. It's as if a part of me is ripped away. There's... an emptiness inside me. I can't remember a thing... my memory... it's all blank. It's... I can't explain.'

He looked up to the night sky. He bit his lip and clenched his hands to fists. Suddenly he felt the desire to scream it all out. All of his frustration, desperation and fear. He wanted to scream it out. Every now and then, a tiny blue spark fell from his fingertips.

'I just don't know what to do,' he said. 'And now I feel angry.' He looked back to Eleanor. 'You can't imagine what I'm going through,' he told her, 'and don't ask me what I'm going through. It feels like... torture... as if my mind's about to explode.'

He sat down on the ground. He covered his face with his hands. It looked like he was crying, and in fact, he was. But those were not tears of sadness, but tears of anger. It was as if he was trapped in a cage, and he wanted to get out. He had to get out. Or... find a way to live with this... this curse.

He lowered his hands and looked up to Eleanor. His eyes glistened of the tears. 'Thank you,' he whispered to her. 'I don't understand why you're trying to help me, but thank you.'