Liliana, the Lament

argutator

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(as always thoughts and comments are appreciated to further improve my char)

[fancybox4="http://i66.tinypic.com/3448714.jpg"]
Liliana, the Lament
[/fancybox4]



Character Information

Gender: Female
Race: Human
Age: 22 years
Height: 1.8 meters
Weight: 54 Kilograms


Compared to her sister, Liliana is set taller and slightly heavier. This allows for her to be the “frontline” of the twins fighting style. While fighting Liliana's black hair silently flows behind like a black ribbon, announcing death to her next victim.



"S.P.E.C.I.A.L" attributes

Strength:

■■■■■■■■■■
Perception:
■■■■■■■■■■
Endurance:
■■■■■■■■■■
Charisma:
■■■■■■■■■■
Intelligence:
■■■■■■■■■■
Agility:
■■■■■■■■■■
Luck:
■■■■■■■■■■


Liliana takes and uses her overall strength and endurance to wear out her enemies. Her height and weight make her less agile but good with perception and control. Liliana’s dislike of social interaction makes her much of a hermit.



Force powers and fighting styles

Force Powers
Acrobatics:
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Energy Manipulation:
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Telekinesis:
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Healing:
■■■■■■■■■■
Status Effects:
■■■■■■■■■■
Sense:
■■■■■■■■■■
Mental Manipulation:
■■■■■■■■■■



Assets

1,000 credits (starting)

2 standard red lightsabers
E-10 blaster




Personality

Personal revenge, hate of other people, the fear of being extorted, and lust for self-gain.
These fuel Liliana day and night. Due to her broken past she dreams the destruction of all especially those whole call themselves “good natured”. In her mind nothing good has truly existed and we all possess evil within. As much as she hates to admit it, completely what she want to achieve will require the assistance of others. Their use may benefit her now but she will strike her judgment onto all at the right time.




Biography
The following is written in the perspective of Liliana reflecting back on her life so far.
My Mother was a beautiful woman: long brunet hair and blue eyes that made you think they could reach into your soul. It was no mystery when a young sith man fell in love with her, and when he discovered he had gotten her pregnant, left her.

Single, alone, and bastardized she decided to pretend we never happened by placing my sister and I into an orphanage. No longer her problem, she vanished away hoping never to see or hear from her two twin daughters.
We began our lives as bastards of the galaxy. Forever damned, even by our own mother, to live in shame of existing.

Slowly, I collected all of the hatred from my life up until this point. I hated my mother for leaving me in this hell of a place. I hated the orphanage for the damnation I had received from the other children and adults. My hatred had grown so much that it become uncontrollable. Inside it was eating me apart.
he day started off like all others: Grim. The other orphans had just finished bullying my sister and I when it happened. Without my will I force pushed the other children away. One pudgy boy flew into the wall face first. The other children all ran off screaming. I look in the corner and see my sister with eyes of astonishment looking at me: her hero, her inspiration.

One particular morning an explosion came from the other side of the village. The smell of burning flesh and hair began to stench the already rotten air. Screams and the low hum of a lightsaber came from the outskirts of the city. Everyone was told to report back into the house but I stayed. My body felt a calling. I sensed the being, his passion for killing, and his purpose for being here…me.
As I stayed paralyzed to my spot the sounds closed in proximity. An aura of darkness began to flood the area. An unfamiliar man’s voice calls out, “Lillea!” as I look to who called I see a man with a sith lightsaber nearly ten meters away. “Show me your hatred!” He yelled. Just then he threw me an lightsaber. I reached for the newly given blade and felt its cool metallic hilt. With an activation of a button I now stood with the deadliest weapon the galaxy has known. First awe, then a sensation of revenge swept over my body. I turn to face the stranger who had gifted me my new weapon. “why?”, I called out. He replyed “I merely want to test your hatred. Show me!”
I slowly began walking to the entrance of the orphanage. Inside stood the horrified children and mothers. I walked through the door and began my judgment. All the children stayed huddled in the corner “for all the times you bullied my sister and I” I called. I activated the lightsaber; the blade felt light in my hands . Time seemed to slow down for everything in front of me; the adrenaline flooding into my body, the sheer enjoyment of revenge. From behind I hear a voice “You monster” one of the women aims a blaster at me and fires. I lift my lightsaber, almost as by habit, and deflect the shot. Quickly I run towards the lady and slice at her legs . She tries to evade but I successfully get contact. She falls to her knees. I say to her “How lucky you are that your death will be quick and effortless while the pains you have given me will never be forgotten” and with that I slice her head off in a clean swoop. All the children begin to scream as they watch me near them. Their inevitable ending. Death


The man walks into the building. “Well done. You failed to disappoint me. I’m impressed to see such skill at such age.” He says while slowing progressing towards my sister and I; now only five meters from us he stops. “I am leaving now. If you want to leave this crummy planet in one piece I’d recommend following me”. With that, he goes and exits the building heading towards the flaming outskirts of town. “Who are you?” I asked in bewilderment. He stopped and replyed "In time you will learn, but you may not like what you hear". With that he continued out of the city.

We both decided at that moment to follow him; and from then on, our lives were in the hands of this stranger who for some reason found an interest in our safe being.


After we left the planet, I decided to approach our pilot. I walk into the cockpit to find the man reclined in his chair smoking a pipe with some weird exotic spice. I clear my throat “Ehmm. Aren’t you supposed to drive this thing?” The man jumps up and turns around. He looks at me from top to bottom then says “Eh. It’s on auto-pilot. What-jah want?”. “Where are we going?” he just laughs, “why to Moraband. Where else?” He inhales and blows the smoke back into my face. I begin to cough “what’s the matter sweet cheeks don’t like the smell? Here have a go” He attempts to pass me his pipe. I immediately slap the pipe out of his hand. He looks at his pipe, laughs, and then glares at me. I immediately feel a pressure closing around my windpipes I begin to squirm as the last bit of air I have is pushed out of my lungs. All I could do was stare at my captor.
“Listen missy. I like you so if you want to live to see tomorrow I would advise you drop your attitude with me”. I fell to my knees and attempted to scream for my sister. In the end my attempt only made a tiny audible squeak. “What’s wrong? Can’t breathe?” he said, “all I want to hear are three little words.” He loosens his force choke and leans in with his ear. “ Go…. To h-hhell” I mutter.
At the same time, I felt a surge of energy from within calling me to release it. This energy began to build up in what felt like my lungs, and I did what felt natural: I exhaled. The man flew to the other side of the cockpit and was pushed into the wall. The choking was released and I began gasping for air. The man stood up again rubbing his head “Man you’re a real ***** ya know that?” he said as he got back into his chair. “Listen we will talk later just get out of my cockpit and let me rest.” With that I turn around and leave.

As the time has passed on, my sister and I have grew in our abilities. Together we are absolutely unstoppable! The man has taken us as his Acolytes, although his purpose remains unclear. Today he called the two of us into his main chamber. The interior was completely composed of a obsidian-like rock leaving the walls full of void and ice cold. There in the middle stood a large pedestal on which a massive throne laid. The two of us move onward to the base of the stairs. “Today, the two of you will show who’s the most powerful” he boomed “ You will each fight each other to the death and the victor will then fight me”. We stared at each other in distraught, “do you get off from our suffering? Why are you doing this?”
He merely smirked and quickly replied “You don’t have to fight each other, but if you want to live to see tomorrow I’d recommend it”. At that moment, I heard the hiss of a lightsaber activate. I turned around to see a my sisters blade pointed towards me “I’m sorry sister”. That was her first and last mistake.



 
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Deviant

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Fantastic piece of work, @argutator.

Though I'd typically recommend an extension of her personality, you are more than welcome to keep it as it is. The detail strewn throughout the sheet is simply amazing regardless.

Don't forget to sign her up here and I will gladly approve her for the Brotherhood.

Nice work!
 

argutator

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Fantastic piece of work, @argutator.

Though I'd typically recommend an extension of her personality, you are more than welcome to keep it as it is. The detail strewn throughout the sheet is simply amazing regardless.

Don't forget to sign her up here and I will gladly approve her for the Brotherhood.

Nice work!
I will of course add more as I continue to build her through RPing and I'll drop her for approval STAT <3
 

Deviant

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Informally approved because I'm in school, on my phone, being a loser.

Will make it official with cute GIF later.
 

Marf

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@argutator

Good start to a Sith. I'm going to offer some advice, which is entirely optional, so you don't need to take it. The variety of defining emotions and passions one can use when writing a Sith character is limitless. So I suggest looking beyond just hatred and anger - both of which are immensely boring and just ugh (your character isn't, I quite like them which is why I wanted to give advice!) Try regret, shame, lust, fear, avarice, love, anxiety, vanity, insecurity, fatigue, etc, etc.

You have mentioned lust, fear and insecurity, which are good, but I would recommend expanding on them. Anyone can feel those things, but they differ in nuance and depth from person to person.

I'd also recommend expanding on her behavior and general mannerisms. I know what she's feeling, but what is like as a person, to experience and talk to.
 
Last edited:

argutator

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@argutator

Good start to a Sith. I'm going to offer some advice, which is entirely optional, so you don't need to take it. The variety of defining emotions and passions one can use when writing a Sith character is limitless. So I suggest looking beyond just hatred and anger - both of which are immensely boring and just ugh (your character isn't, I quite like them which is why I wanted to give advice!) Try regret, shame, lust, fear, avarice, love, anxiety, vanity, insecurity, fatigue, etc, etc.

You have mentioned lust, fear and insecurity, which are good, but I would recommend expanding on them. Anyone can feel those things, but they differ in nuance and depth from person to person.

I'd also recommend expanding on her behavior and general mannerisms. I know what she's feeling, but what is like as a person, to experience and talk to.
I appreciate your feedback and will work to further improve my character (like you I constantly tweak at my sheets to make them better). The ideas you brought up are very helpful and I will apply them when I have an opportunity. At the moment IRL I have a major project due so my priorities have to be that until it is complete :/
Again, Thank you @Marf friend <3
 
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