- Joined
- Dec 4, 2017
- Messages
- 101
- Reaction score
- 103
Biographical information
Homeworld
Age
Nar Shaddaa
38
Age
Nar Shaddaa
38
Physical Description
Species
Gender
Height
Mass
Hair color
Eye color
Skin color
Human
Male
5'10"
More to Love
Brown
Brown
Pale
Gender
Height
Mass
Hair color
Eye color
Skin color
Human
Male
5'10"
More to Love
Brown
Brown
Pale
Misc. Information
Affiliation(s):
Independent
Profession:
Fight Promoter
Game Show Host
Independent
Profession:
Fight Promoter
Game Show Host
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Ricky Ravage
Excerpt · The Legend · Personality · Business Plan · Powers and Abilities
The story of Ricky Ravage is one not for the faint of heart. From aspiring fighter to crippled in a freak tauntaun riding accident, the tale of Ricky Ravage is one of triumph. One of defeat. One of dreams, both ones being fulfilled and others being crushed horrifically. Tales of pure ecstasy and ones of soul crushing depression. And, it's a love story. A love story between a man and his lust for fame, fortune and a gaggle of Twi'lek schuttas.
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▵The Legend
So you want to hear the legend that is me, Ricky Ravage, do you? Well, I can't say I blame you. I'm pretty kriffing awesome. From the slicked back, permed mullet to the mass I've been cultivating in a way that radiates wealth and excellence I'd be surprised if you hadn't heard about me yet. Yeah, I was a pretty big deal in my twenties when I was the pound for pound best Pit fighter on my home planet of Nar Shaddaa. I had everything, the strength, the speed, the women and most importantly the money. I didn't let the fame get to my head though, I truly believe it's important to stay humble. So that's why I titled this biography 'The Legend', after me, Ricky Ravage.
I was the best and I still am! I'm Ricky Kriffing Ravage, the Savage who kicked... I'm running out of rhymes. Kriff you. I guess all great legends like myself start at the beginning so let's start over. I'm Ricky Ravage and today you're going to be learning about me: the man, the myth, the legend.
It all started when I was a chunky kid at age 14. This legend doesn't start with my parents dying or me gaining super powers or any of that over the top edgy Jedi Exile crap. Nothing interesting happens when you're a kid if you're as awesome as me, you played video games and looked at hot babes all day on the holonet. Well, back then little Ricky Ravage wasn't so into his mass so he joined a boxing gym. Badass right? Right.
For once something clicked with me and before I knew it I was punching people's faces professionally. Now you're probably thinking to yourself... Ricky... with so much man and so much mullet how could you possibly fight the way you did? Pure. Unadulterated. Badassery. I was born to kick ass and be famous and I do both of those things like a kriffing boss! I fought until my early thirties when... the accident happened.
It was the spring time on some resort planet. I was in shape, I had an 8 pack and a 6 pack of Twi'lek courtesans that were sucking my life, my wallet and me dry. I was on so many drugs they could have legally declared me awesome on the sheer fact that I was alive and still doing life up Ricky Ravage style. I was famous, I was hot, they were hot... And that's when I saw it...
Competitive... Tauntaun... Racing...
Now I know what you're thinking, no don't tell me. You're thinking that why is this such a big deal Ricky when EVERYTHING you touch is pure excellence? I'll tell you what... I'm a man of honor, morality and being an all around humble guy.... I will tell you right now that the minute I sat on that Tauntaun I was destined for greatness racing too... Unfortunately that was all the spice and the next thing I knew my back was broken and I couldn't feel my legs.
The worst part is it wasn't even my fault, it really wasn't. A Rogue tauntaun had escaped from the pin behind us and wanted some action on the female I was riding on before the race even began and the rest is history. I was trapped in the middle and well, bastard broke my back. Worse three way I ever had. Really memorable though.
So there I was, couldn't feel my toes or my junk. My life was over. If I couldn't box what was I good for? As I sat there in the hospital the smokin' hot nurses there turned on the game show channel for me and that was that. I spent months absorbing hundreds of hours of word games, money games, funny games, crappy games, old games, you name it I know it. If you have a 15 letter word and all the vowels are already bought baby I can guess it. As crazy as it sounds I started to love how cheesy this stuff was and then I had discovered yet another passion of mine that I was going to absolutely crush: being a game show host.
I had only been a pro fighter for about 10 years before I became crippled. Thankfully it wasn't permanent and a few years later I could feel my junk again, the toes and legs and all that crap came later but at that point I didn't really care. How did I get better? The force, magic, hell if I know. All I know is that the doctors got me better after I had rented out that hotel room to myself so I wouldn't have to go no where. Having a personal hot nurse staff on the pay roll is AWESOME. Would highly recommend. Anyways, I was now 34 and everyone had left me behind. I had just spent the better part of 5 years laid up in a bed, cultivating mass and watching crappy television. The women were gone, my training team was gone and for whatever reason all my money was gone. I blame my sleazy manager and that schutta of a wife of his. Me staying in the hospital as long as I did didn't have anything to do it he's a damn thief!
So, my fighting dream was dead. I had the aspiration of becoming a game show host but that was put on the back burner as I did some job searching. I tried to become a coach but no one was going to listen to me I was too fat and my mullet was too great. The sport moves fast and they forget their legends faster. Tried to become a school teacher but the administrators said I cursed too much, what kriffing dummies right? The Legend Ricky Ravage has a mouth of gold and a tongue of... more gold. When all that didn't work I decided that a life of vagrancy was right for me.
And then I hit the jackpot.
After being homeless and fighting Coruscant bums for a year (professionally, I'm the best) I stumbled across an old building on level 34. Yup, got that low. What do I find in there? Remnants of the SICKEST boxing gym ever. And get this, they use to box eachother WITH LIGHTNING! I'm not even kriffing kidding you guy, this place was crazy. It made perfect sense, make the spectacle a bigger spectacle. I did some digging and what do you know, before those Jedi and Exile schuttas went and crapped all over the universe there use to be a thing called SHOCK BOXING. Doesn't that sound awesome? Say it with me, 'SHOCK BOXING!'. I've spent the past 3 years studying this sport, traveling from world to world doing odd jobs to raise enough money to learn more about this ancient sport and eventually restart it with the help from some suckers.
Current day fights are boring and the fighters are even more boring. It's time to bring the Ravage lifestyle back to the public and keep it there. Now, after all my hardships and struggles I'm bringing the first organized Shock Boxing Championship back to the public after 100 years of it being missing. After I make some money doing that I'll start my own line of game shows but that's not the point right now. The point is reintroducing the galaxy to it's number 1 celebrity: Me, Ricky Ravage.
Oh, and Shock Boxing too! Stay tuned, schuttas.
▵Personality
If you didn't learn anything in my auto-biography titled simply 'The Legend' then you have no business reading about my personality. Get out of here!
▵Business Plan
- Find Sucker to Make Shock Boxing Gloves real.
- Hire on more suckers to run this joint.
- Put together sick fights.
- Repeat.
- Get rich.
- Make more sick fights.
- Get richer.
- Find Hot 10/10 Wife.
- More Fights.
- Game Show project.
- Get richerest.
Retire to a modest home on-NOPE MORE MONEY BABY- Hold the SBC in a main arena on a city planet.
- Make all the money.
▵Powers and Abilities
My powers and abilities? That's a uhh... weird question to ask someone. Are you alright? Well... for starters I don't box anymore. My back is all sorts of jacked up and I'm almost kriffing 40. I fight with my words and convince other people to fight for me now because I can make them a ton of credits if they just listen. Oh, and I keep myself strapped with this baby here. Dangerous huh? Think it's called a CZBP-9 or some other stupid name like that. I don't fight anymore but if someone gets fresh with Ricky Ravage then they'll end up in a hospital. Though I haven't shot this thing in a while...
Also I'm not a bad pilot. I go over the speed limit in residential zones but my ship is a piece of junk. It's one of them Nerf Herder Light Freighters. I figure I can store all the company's goods in that bad boy when transporting from world to world. It has some custom decal work on the side, the words "Ricky Ravage" spray painted in gold. It's a sick ride.
Oh, and since I can't fly this huge piece of ju- advanced engineering I have this kriffing droid named MR-A55 who helps me plot courses and stuff. He's a really bad roommate, is super loud and I can't wait to replace him. Has a great name though!
