Ask Shooting the Unshootable

[Finn Galfridian]

Finn played around with the blaster, ducking and juking behind imaginary cover to hide from enemies that weren't there, making pew pew sounds as he imagined himself in one of the Summons of Responsibility games. He only stopped when he heard the door open behind him, straightening up just in time to avoid being seen acting the fool. The instructor that walked in didn't even bother to give him a look, probably because she had seen all his antics from the holocam in the corner of the room. She simply walked up, took the blaster from him, and started inspecting him, likely making sure if was locked in a non-lethal setting.

"Are you sure you've done this before? I still think you should take the beginner's course. Finn snatched the blaster back from her hands, and did a cool spin with it before slapping ti down on the counter in front of him. "Yeah, yeah, just relax. I've done this a thousand times lady. I was ranked in the top three percent of all marksmen on Toydaria. Chill." What he left out was that it had been an online battle, and he had been shooting with a keyboard and mouse, and that he had never really fired an actual blaster in his life. Sure, he had bought a prop to display behind him during his streams, and practiced the spin trick with it a thousand times before mastering it, but never before had he actually held not that actually worked. Besides, it was the same logic, you aim, you shoot. How hard could it be?

"How about this? Once I ace your little test I take you out to dinner, show you a good time?" That was also something he was only familiar with in his own head, but having gone on a million sim-dates, he knew there was nothing to worry about. The instructor of course wasn't impressed, and did not even acknowledge the question. Completing the course setup, she simply walked out, telling him to wait till the other trainee arrived, reminding him not to touch the blaster till then.

Finn waited all of ten seconds after she left before picking up the blaster, and resuming his game from before. So engrossed was he that he didn't even notice the door open once more, and found himself at the end of a sloppy roll, coming up less than gracefully as the door opened with him letting out yet another "Pew! Pew!"

 

[Trace]

Trace was out of her element on this one. Blaster training was one of several electives she was able to take, and she figured it was a useful skill if nothing else. She'd never actually fired a blaster before, but that was why she was here... to learn. Before she was on a battlefield and had to learn.

She had a vague sense of what was going on even before she entered the room because she didn't have to actually see people to see them. Yet as she entered, this guy just... kept on at it. There was no one else in the room, but he was spinning around, his blaster spinning to shoot at all the nonexistent people and... was he narrating things? Or giving "commands" to someone?

I take it you're the other student? she asked, half hoping he would jump at the realization that someone else was here with him now. Though, upon seeing that she had a blindfold on, she wondered if he would assume she was completely helpless.

She moved over to take one of the pistols off the wall, grabbing a powerpack as well and loading it up. She had at least done her research about how to use a blaster before coming even if she'd never actually used one before. The instructor had been similarly hesitant about her arrival in the course as well, but she'd met the woman before during saber instruction and proven herself capable. When Trace told her that there were no beginner classes available for her schedule, she'd given the Miraluka an exemption.

So, you've got experience with this? Or just pew-pewing in your mind? she asked with a smirk.

 

[Finn Galfridian]

"Pew?!" Finn's voice cracked as the word escaped his lips, staring at the blindfolded girl and trying to find words to put in his mouth but pathways that connected his brain to his mouth seemingly occupied with something else.

Finally getting a grip, he cleared his throat as he pushed himself to his feet, and tried again, making his voice a little deeper than normally was to compensate for the earlier squeak. "This little thing?" He asked, trying to appear nonchalant, as he held up the blaster and doing the spin once more before returning it to a holster at his side that wasn't there. It took him a few failed attempts before he realized that there was no holster, at which point he immediately stopped, blaster just held at his side. "Yeah, I'd say I'm pretty good with it." Before he could say more a supremely tired voice spoke up over the speakers. "You can start, step up to lane 3 and begin."

Finn tried to give Trace a cocky smile, and gave her a wink as he turned to move towards the firing lane. "Watch this!" With completely unfounded bravado, he stepped up to the lane, and as the buzzer went off, he squeezed the trigger. But with no actual experience firing a blaster, he wasn't prepared for the recoil, nor did he have the strength to deal with it. His hand swung upwards, and the blaster slammed into his nose. He fell to the floor, blaster clattering away, as his hands went up to cradle his face.

"Mhy nhoze!" He cried out, shaking hands holding his broken and bleeding nose. "Ogh phuuuuk mhy nhoze!"

 

[Trace]

Trace watched as he stepped up to the firing lane, and she was entirely unprepared for what happened next. He'd said he was experienced, so she expected... experience. After all, this was the advanced firearms training course.

He was not advanced...

The blaster went off, and she could hear the sound of crunching bone. She could smell the scent of blood, and she could hear the trickle as it dripped down his face, now buried under the sound of his pained speech.

Oohf, she said, grimacing slightly and not totally sure what to do. Are you... okay? she asked, taking several steps forward to try to lend a hand. She diverted from her course, moving off to the side to grab one of the blaster cleaning rags and bringing it over to him to stem the bleeding.

Look, I think it's broken, you should get to the infirmary... she suggested. This was going to be a short lived training session, it seemed.

I... uh... I have a medpack, she said, hurrying over to her backpack and pulling out a medpack and shuffling through until she felt some bacta gel and spray.

I don't know if you can spray this stuff up a nose. I guess we can find out, she said, promptly preparing to do just that without having read the directions at all.

@Wit

 

[Finn Galfridian]

"No!!" He screamed, before immediately regretting it as that sent another surge of pain through his nose. "No infirmary, they fill you up with some weird shit. I got a big match tonight, need to be on my game. My team's gonna be tilted if I show up doped up."

Forcing himself up to a sitting position, using his sleeve to gingerly wipe away some of the blood, he nodded as Trace mentioned having a medkit. But stopped mid-nod as he heard her mention her doubts about spraying bacta up a nose. He was about to complain, maybe the infirmary was better after all, but didn't get the opportunity as he heard the distinct sound of an aerosol can being released, and felt a sting in his nose as the bacta hit.

He tried to scream, but the bacta kicked in fast, and he found that he couldn't breathe through his nose. So instead of screaming he ended up breaking down in a fit of coughs, till he finally managed to take a few deep breaths through his mouth. As he did so he felt the pain recede a little, while a tingly feeling spread through his body. Whatever else the bacta might do on the rather unconventional application, it did wonders for the pain. "Sweet Palpatine!" He let out the exclamation as his body let out an involuntary shudder, and for a moment he just sat there, soaking in the weird mixture of pain and bacta high that was surging through him.

Having heard and seen all the commotion, the instructor came charging into the room, and immediately noticed his coughing induced puffy red eyes, and be it the recent events on Taris, or just her general experience with kids his age, she immediately jumped to assumptions. "Great, another stoner. Stay right there, I have to report this."

Finn opened his mouth to say something, but she was there and gone before he could react, and panic started to take hold. Not about the complaint itself, he was sure that would get dropped after they tested him and found out he was clean. No, the bigger problem was that if she filed a complaint then it would be his third strike of the month, which meant a week long ban from the games. That wasn't good, that wasn't good at all.

"You have to help me," he whined desperately to Trace, all traces of fake swagger gone from his voice, not when his livelihood was one the line, "if she files that report I'm fucked. It'll be weeks before they clear all this shit up and I'll fall at least three tiers by then. Please, I'll do anything, just help me stop her. Priority registration, access codes to the prefect's bathrooms, whatever you want, I can get it. Please!!" There was no reason for her to believe him, though for once he was actually speaking the truth, he really did know how to get her those things.

@Phoenix

 

[Trace]

What big match? she asked, mouth pulling back at the corners in skepticism about whatever he was saying.

There was a satisfying click-whoosh as the aerosol released and injected its way up his nose. It didn't occur to her that there were probably students who actually did huff bacta, but that wasn't what this was. This was just her trying to fix a broken nose.

Evidently, Instructor Remel didn't believe that. He started begging her to help him out, and she could hear the instructor's footfalls receding each moment. Yet, there was a certain tone to his voice that said it wasn't all fake self-confidence anymore. It was more genuine, and there weren't enough genuine people in this world...

...either that or she wanted the favors he was promising. She jabbed a finger into his chest. I will cash in this favor, you better pay up, she said before quickly jumping to her feet and quick walking to catch up with the instructor.

Instructor Remel! she said, half running down the balcony to catch up. He was very fortunate that she had some goodwill from her previous work with Remel or he would have been straight out of luck.

He injured his nose and I was helping him get sorted. You can come back and see, there's lots of blood. It was just an accident, she said.

Tracela, the woman said, and Trace internally cringed at her full name. You're a good student, don't get mixed up with the... unsavory elements of this academy, she said. Trace could sense the woman weighing her next step.

Neither of you have any idea what you're doing with a blaster, do you? she finally said, and Trace pressed her lips together.

Not particularly, ma'am, she said. But we are both very eager to learn and overcome that, she said. And it didn't matter how eager he was or wasn't, he was going to be eager because she was putting her neck on the line for him.

Get his nose fixed and get back to work, she said, and Trace wasted no time in heading back.

You're not getting reported, but you better tell me what's so important you're willing to get us both in trouble rather than go to the infirmary for, she said grumpily upon her return.

@Wit

 

[Finn Galfridian]

When Trace returned she would find Finn sitting cross-legged on the floor, his mostly cleaned up but for random smears of dried up blood. He had a datapad out in front of him, and a small foldable keyboard spread out on his lap which he was typing away on. He seemed even more immersed in whatever he was doing than his little roleplaying session from earlier, and it was only when she spoke up that he looked up from the screen.

"Wait, wait, wait." He carefully folded the keyboard and put it away in a pocket of his oversized jacket before jumping to his feet. "Hold right up. You mean she actually bought it? She believed you?" His eyebrows furrowed in frustration mixed with as she continued with more than a bit of indignation in his voice, completely ignoring the questions she had asked off him. "What the fuck, I'm five minutes late and she sends me to detention, and you somehow manage to convince her I wasn't puffing bacta?" He paused, leaning forward and peering at her as a closer look would provide answers. "You're one of those overachievers that all the teachers love, aren't you? What are you doing in a basic class like this then?"

All the frowning made him scrunch up his nose in a way that made the pain spike again, and he pulled back with a pained expression. "Eh, whatever. Here." He held out the datapad for her, and on it was the student profile of one of the prefects whose account he had sliced into earlier as a prank, and displayed were not only his account details, but his login credentials. "On the house, as thanks."

Letting her study the datapad, he returned to the firing lane and picked up the blaster once more, muttering to himself as he motivated himself to take another shot. Trace, if she looked carefully at the datapad, would find another window open behind the one with the prefect's info. And clearly visible in the bits that were visible would be a holonet search. How to fire a blaster without breaking your nose.

"The name's Finn," he called out as he lined up the blaster once more, "though you might have heard of my other name." He squeezed the trigger once more, and though it was nowhere near being on target, this time he didn't injure his nose. He turned to her with a wide grin on his face. "FirePuma142, in the flesh."

@Phoenix

 

[Trace]

She crossed her arms in front of her, less than thrilled at what he was saying.

Yeah, because getting in good with the instructors clearly doesn't have any advantages, she said. Look, if you want me to undo this for you, I'm sure I can work on that, she quipped back. Of course, she wasn't going to actually do that at this point, but still.

Thanks, she said, though she had no idea if she would ever use it. I'm Trace, nice to meet you, she said. Fortunately for him, she wasn't able to passingly read screens so easily, so his secret was safe for the moment.

Firepuma142? she asked, tilting her head to the side. Are you a streamer or something? she asked, having no clue who he was, but figuring that sounded an awful lot like a username.

He stepped up to the firing line and shot again. He didn't hit his target, but she couldn't judge. At least his nose wasn't broken this time.

She grabbed her own gun, raising it and squeezing the trigger. She... also didn't hit the target. She was close to two feet off the target and held the gun in her hand before grunting.

Well, Mr. Puma. I think we have our work cut out for us, she said. But really, what's so critical that you couldn't go get help? Some sort of suspension against your streaming account? she asked.

@Wit

 

[Finn Galfridian]

"I'm not just a streamer," he replied with more confidence that was warranted for someone with a swollen nose and half his face covered in blood, "I'm the best there is." He tried firing again, but yet again shot well wide, which likely did nothing to support his bravado.

"Huh." He muttered in response to Trace's comment about their work being cut out for them, having seen her attempt. "You less than me, that was a whole lot better than what I managed. Which makes no sense, my biggest strength is my aim, so it should translate to the real thing." Tossing the blaster back onto the counter in front of him in frustration, and then proceeded to jump onto the counter so that he was sitting on it.

"Well, if you're so interested, there's this big game tonight." He slipped a hand into a pocket and pulled out a pack of gum, and offered one to her before pulling one out for himself and beginning chewing on it as he continued. "They call it the Kessel Gun, biggest Mando Strike tournament of the year. Tonight's the last qualifier. Winner gets a few thousand credits, but more importantly an invitation to Serenno for the finals. Do you have any idea the sort of juice they have on those Serennian networks? They say the Meatman has his own underground network with so much dirt on the noble houses that it would make the Empress blush. I need to get my hands on that, imagine how big my channel will get if I manage to livestream that reveal!!"

He blew out the gum till it popped, and proceeded to suck it back in and resume chewing. "The problem is I got into a little bit of trouble with this RA, he confiscated my gear, so I've been using borrowed gear. That's already gonna throw my game off, so can't risk being high as well. At that point I might as well forfeit."

He was in the process of blowing out the gum once more, but paused midway, the gum deflating slowly till it was just dangling down the front of his face. "You've got an in with the teachs, right? You wouldn't happen to know any of the RAs, would ya?" There was a glint in his eyes as the smallest spark of hope burst behind them. If she could get a professor to reconsider writing him up, what could she manage with a lowly RA?

@Phoenix

 

[Trace]

Suffice it to say, Trace was a bit doubtful of some of his claims about being "the best there is" but she honestly had no idea, so she gave him the benefit of the doubt.

I don't know, I still missed, she said, clearly unsatisfied with her performance. She gave it another shot - literally - but this one was even further from the target. She sighed and tried to think about what she was doing wrong as he spoke. After a few moments, she set the gun down and turned toward him.

Thanks, she said, accepting the gum and popping a piece in her mouth. The Kessel Gun? A Mando Strike tournament? A meatman!?

That all sounds... uh... cool? she said, though she had to admit pulling down a couple thousand for something he was clearly so passionate about sounded pretty neat.

She kept chomping away at the gum for a few moments, sucking a bubble into her mouth with a pop as she thought about his predicament and he asked her to help with an RA.

I don't really know any of the RAs, she said after a moment. What'd they get you for, though? Might still be able to help, she said. She knew how to rules-lawyer with the best of them and she might still be able to help him out, though she wasn't sure exactly why she'd stick her neck out.

She listened to him, but went back to firing several more shots, trying to stifle the desire to jump every time she pulled the trigger. She was determined to get this down, dang it!

@Wit

 

[Finn Galfridian]

At her mention of the competition being cool he flashed her a genuine smile, glad to see someone actually agree with him. More often then not he was met with contempt for his interests, so it was good to receive from positive feedback.

"Bullshit mostly." He replied to her question he jumped down from the counter, seeing her keep on shooting and doing better than what he had managed on every try made his competitive side itch, so he grabbed his blaster once more to give it another try. "Apparently," he said after firing off a shot, still way off target, "using academy resources to mine Bith-coins is against the rules, eating up too much power or some crap like that. He really just wanted all my coins, that's what it's really about. He just needed an excuse to get his hands on my system."

He tried firing a few more shots, trying to recall what he had managed to read up in the brief glance he'd been able to give the articles he had dug up on blaster training. Taking a slow breath before he fire hadn't worked, but then it had also mentioned something about closing your eyes and focusing on the target. What he had missed was that the article asked to close one eye to help focus on the target, but assumed that it was some bullshit about aiming using the Force, so gave it a try nonetheless.

So he closed his eyes and fired, but aimed far too high, and the shot ricocheted off a wall and slammed right into the smoke detector right above them. Opening his eyes as water started raining down on them, he blinked a few times till he spotted just where his shot had landed, and turned to Trace with an incredulous look on his face. "Okay, you have to admit, that was pretty cool, right?"

@Phoenix

 

[Trace]

Trace listened and thought about what he said. To her knowledge, there weren't actually any rules regarding student power consumption on campus, and if this guy really was just trying to steal bithcoin, that was open season as far as Trace was concerned.

They kept firing before one of the shots struck the smoke detector. Water started showering down on them and Trace actually squeaked, trying to scramble out of the water and zip up her backpack before everything got soaked.

She didn't even hear what he said as she darted out of the room and stopped outside, trying to shake off some of the water from her clothes and bag.

Okay, I don't think I'm going to be able to talk you out of that one, she said, sensing the water pouring down that now drenched the room.

So... if I help you get your gear back, what's in it for me? she asked with a mischievous smirk.

RAs need to do inspections of rooms reported for contraband, right? So we make a report, wait for him to inspect, break in, and get your gear. Better not move it back into your room, though, she said, facing him and waiting for him to say yay or nay to the plan.