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The Force had been unheeding of his pleas for clarity and help the moment he'd heard word that Master Alex and Master Tionson have finally returned from their journey to Ajan Kloss.
Maiko never liked making assumptions, but when his Master dropped him off to the Jedi Temple on Yavin-IV with only a word about herself traveling to Ajan Kloss the young Padawan's mind jumped from one harrowing thought to another. What was Master Alex's business on that moon? Had the Sith returned to the corrupted temple and she was sent to fight them off? Was she sent back there to do something about the Darkness that now corrupted the place he had called his second home?
His ever growing concern for his Master had made him aloof. For the whole duration of her absence Maiko had withdrawn to himself, for once turning away the thought of company and spending his time either wandering alone down the hallways, hiding in the library, and pleading for the Force to keep his Master safe. The young Padawan had also actively avoided Grandpa Rupert's usual routes in the Temple, knowing full well that the old Morellian Knight would be concerned about Maiko's behaviour. No, he couldn't be a burden. Not to Grandpa Rupert, not to his friends, and most certainly not to his Master.
Master Alex instructed him to train and meditate while she was away, but his worry for her kept distracting him. It was rather unbecoming of the Padawan she expected him to be, and for that he felt ashamed. Maybe it was one of the reasons why he kept on putting off with visiting her when she finally returned to Yavin-IV.
He'd heard of the injuries Master Tionson received after their mission to Ajan Kloss. And Maiko feared that he would see the same injuries on Master Alex – regardless if said injuries were physical or not.
Maybe he should've expressed his desire to accompany her to that mission. With two fully trained Jedi – one a Knight and the other a Master – Maiko knew that his presence would not change nor contribute to anything. Heck, he knew he would be a liability to them, even. But he still couldn't stop the guilt and the worry that was starting to fester in his heart. It was unbecoming of him, aspiring to be a great healer and all, but he was also young and wore his heart on his sleeve. He had already lost Master Atuvrak, and while Master Alex had returned from Ajan Kloss he could not help but fear that whatever she had experienced there would also end up with Maiko losing her.
The fear that ate at him during and after the tragedy on Ajan Kloss reared its ugly head as he stepped out into the sunlit courtyard to meet Master Alex. He knew that she hated the feeling of being trapped within the Temple, and so he followed her presence through the Force until it led him outside. The courtyard was mercifully empty, save for his Master who stood from a distance. His heart pounded against his sternum at the sight of her, and once more guilt rose in his chest.
What kind of a Padawan was he for not even coming to his Master's side when she returned from a dangerous mission? What kind of a Padawan was he for avoiding visiting her, for even excusing his worries and fears with something as laughable as giving his Master time and space to herself?
He had made a promise to walk by her side, and what was he doing now?
Tears filled Maiko's eyes as he mustered the courage to take a step forward, then another, closing the distance between him and Master Alex. He felt silly for wanting to cry, so he blinked the tears away until his vision was not clouded anymore. But it was only a matter of time before the tears would show once again, and he could only try to hold them off even just for a little bit.
"Master?" he called out to her hesitantly, his hands finding purchase with one another, fingers twisting and twining against one another to somehow redirect his anxiety.
@Valen Pelora
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