Varian

Infintus

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NAME: Varian

FACTION / AFFILIATION / FORCE AFFILIATION: Dark Side of the Force - SITH ~ Sith Inquisitors

RANK: Initiate

SPECIES: Human

AGE: 26

HAIR COLOR: Black

EYE COLOR: Blood Red

Height: 6 foot 8

Weight: 100 KG's

HOMEWORLD: Alderaan

GENDER: Male

FORCE SENSITIVE: Yes, Trained / still Training

APPEARANCE: Tall - 6 foot 8, Built – large shoulders and average size muscles on all body parts, not very heavy/large in weight - 100 Kilo’s, Black Hair - Hair is tied into a bun, Scar(s), Left Eye - 3 Scratches from a Nexu, he has caramel colored tanned skin. Eyes are blood red. His eyes are also bloodshot (bloodshot is black)
ATTRIBUTES/PERSONALITY: He is trying outgrow his harsh and violent temper, he is sadistic and has homicidal tendencies, he is calculating and likes to analyse and predict, in war, and other things, he has never had friends but can choose to be friendly to someone who shows him kindness, he doesn't appreciate being tested, nor having his authority and power challenged by someone he deems lower than himself, he thinks highly of himself but acknowledges he isn't invincible, he likes loneliness at times, but he is severely depressed, he hides this with his posture and tries to convince himself that he is more, believing that he will have a major impact on the Galaxy.
His lack of friends and family make him clingy - so if he happens to gain a master, he will be a bit of a suck-up, his only friends are his droid and monitor.

He is usually on private grounds studying and training in Lightsaber Combat and CQC (melee, blasters, explosives), if he is studying and training in the Force / Dark Side he will head to a cave or forest which is routinely.​

SKILLS: Knowledge in: War / Combat Strategy and Tactics - Advanced in W / C S T - Theory, in experience he is a Novice.
~Trained to use Blasters and other firearms + exotic weapons (explosives). - Novice.
~Trained to use any melee weapon - Intermediate.
~Lightsaber Combat: Trains in Makashi > Lightsaber Stance, he adds other forms to his own, he likes to improvise his techniques and even create new fighting techniques by using combinations of different forms, he favors Makashi. - Intermediate in Makashi, Novice + Intermediate for other forms.
~The Force / The Dark Side:
~He is an intermediate in Telekinesis.
~Force Push - Advanced
~Lightning - Novice.
~He uses Force Repulse combined with lightning when angered - Novice​

GEAR: He wears a Black ‘Jedi’ Tunic, and usually wears a robe to conceal most of his body except his face. He carries one lightsaber on his right side, and hides 4 more on his belt above his buttocks concealed from anyone. His war armor consists of a Reinforced Phrik Chest Guard he hides his chest guard with a robe that drags below his feet, and for headgear he wears a Riot Quellers Helm. He was gifted with this armor from his father, this gear was what his father when he first served the Sith.
RELATIONSHIPS: He wasn't close to his father, his father raised him to be a killing machine for the empire and nothing else, his father was a Juggernaut before he left the empire which explains Varian's natural ruthlessness, he has no emotional attachment to his mother as she only gave him pain, his relationship with his droid is just a mutual respect for one another.

SHIP(s): Sith Infiltrator (star fighter).

DROID(s): R7 - 47 Astromech Droid

PET(s): None

KILLS: 100+ criminals, a village of tusken raiders 50+, a rancor, a Nexu, 300+ Civilians (NPC - unwritten)
COMBAT: Besides fighting the people in the 'KILL' Section then no.
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Born on Alderaan to a wealthy family, who secretly were Dark Siders who supported the Sith, Varian was raised to serve the Empire under his family's household, he went to a school where he studied business,
Before Varians' parents were rich, they were mere servants of the empire, they met during a battle and got married years later, they asked the council to be granted the right to live a 'normal life', the council agreed and gave them power and status on Alderaan in return for their potential child to serve them and that the couple use a portion of their wealth to support the empire.
Varian was home schooled, hidden and locked away from society, Varian's mother would experiment Sith Alchemy and Sith Sorcery on him from adolescence to his late teens, his mother would also poison him countless amount of times that it became part of his blood system, giving him immunity to some poisons, but he felt anguish throughout his life from there on, being forced to feed on his hate for his family, the poisons altered a few physical attributes like his eye color, it could be possible that from it becoming part of his blood system he could spit toxins, he hasn't tried it yet nor thought of it, the experiments would inflict harsh amounts of pain and suffering, making him slightly numb to it, his parents would constantly mentally abuse him as much as physical, and during that time he is sent onto missions by his Father, such as massacring entire villages, and a few criminals just for sport, one was a surprise and his Father threw him into a pit with a Nexu, whilst unarmed, he eventually killed it but at the cost of some flesh on his face, the Nexu had clawed him, however Varian would be awarded for his efforts after completing his trials, like being gifted a Sith Infiltrator, and being granted a collection of weapons and equipment of the all sorts, even though Varian was selective with his inventory, he found R7 in the market, and killed the merchant that owned him, and reprogrammed him to be his companion.
Taught with basic knowledge of the outside world and the Sith, when he turned 19 he no-longer could stand his parents and killed both of them.
Years have passed and Varian has been officially made an initiate to the Sith Inquisitors - the force shall decide his future.
 
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Kori Buor

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First remove the code boxes, then I can actually take a look at this profile.
 

Kori Buor

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Alright, not bad for your first attempt, let me try and help you out so your approval process will be smoother.

The Jedi and Sith kills will most likely need to go unless the respective factions give you approval. Also Darth Bane isn't a character in this timeline he would have been able to steal a ship from in all honesty.

I'd change his attributes to his personality section. And to be frank he seems a little too good at everything. Intelligent, cunning, strong, gifted athlete and force user, vast knowledge of the dark side? Yeah, no thanks. He's very Gary Stu right now. Try giving your character some room to grow along with some serious flaws other than he's greedy and craves more knowledge. He'll be more interesting for it.

I'd suggest going into more detail about... well honestly everything. Growing up, his schooling, his training, why his family supported the Sith, what he did when the Republic fell and the Sith Empire took its place and how that affected him and his family, why his father used him as his own personal assassin, etc.

Additionally, you don't need all those dashes, a few would do, alternatively you can remove them completely and just use a little header to indicate the gaps. On mobile it looks a little messy.
 

Bastilo Marshall

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In your entire Biography there's only one period it would be better to use a bit less coma's and put some periods between places where you think people would pause in this. I'll give you an example of an upcoming Sith I'm making.
 

Bastilo Marshall

Rising jedi (:
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Here's an example.
|
Chapter 1- Birth Gift
Born on a ship into a family of 2 human Jedi both his parents. After 3 years of having him a loving him they found out he had a "gift" which allowed him to use and type of sorcery professionally with little to no practice including Sith sorcery. They didn't know what to do about it and told an old seer who knew of this which was a dire curse and needed to be exterminated. The Jedi refused to kill there child and then the seer notified a Sith of the child and then Sith gathered troops to take the child. When they attacked and stormed the ship being very urgent they made a holo video about how much they love him and what they want him to be in there place and they sent him off in an escape pod which entered the atmosphere of Dathomir while his parents took on the Sith and were never seen again. As he entered the atmosphere of Dathomir at blazing hot speed the dark energies in the atmosphere clustered inside and on top of the burning hot escape pod merging through and onto Cro's skin turning most of his skin pitch black and making him lighter as well as taller. As he mutated the ships flames turned green and combusted as it slammed into the ground and exploded into a volley of flames. Merely scratched and limping the newly 9 year old Cro walked out of the flames unscathed with pitch black skin along with being taller.


In your Biography add events in his life which would have shaped his personality also put some small events that happened to him that gave him his scars.
 

Bastilo Marshall

Rising jedi (:
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Same pink is my first name... Even though I'm a mail.... MOM why did you name me PINK!?
 

xGhoulz

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Woah, the set up for your bio is pretty cool, i love how you put what happened at certain ages in his life. It's pretty cool, i don't really have anything to say about what you should put, but i thought it was cool.
 

Infintus

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Woah, the set up for your bio is pretty cool, i love how you put what happened at certain ages in his life. It's pretty cool, i don't really have anything to say about what you should put, but i thought it was cool.


Cheers man I appreciate your thoughts.
 

Marf

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I don't just kill, I mutilate, "play" with, and eat my victims.
What the fuck?

Ok, I'm going to offer my two cents on this profile. The character is needlessly talented with very little nuance or flaws. I highly suggest giving him major weaknesses and vulnerabilities, other than simply being greedy, which many Sith would regard as a strength. If he is impulsive and headstrong, he would not be particularly manipulative. Since he kills with very little reason and simply lives to just kill, then he would not be intelligent either or concerned with amassing knowledge. The business and maths also seem unnecessary and don't really serve his role as a warrior.

Characters can have a few things they are very good at, but they also need fatal flaws which balance out their strengths. It makes them more interesting and complex and generally more fun to RP with.

If you need any help with your character you're welcome to send me a message.
 
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