Ask In the Still, Small Silence

[Varyn Atrix]

Per my OP template, thread is death enabled​

Varyn hadn't been given much information by the hospital staff about the status of Knight al-Bahir, but he'd been given her room number, and that put him on the right path.

He had arrived to the hospital in his armor with lightsabers on his belt, and headed in the direction of the room number he had been given. Besides knowing that she was awake, he didn't know what state he would find her in. Based on the reports he had read she had lost multiple limbs and taken a hit that likely would have killed General Dram.

She was a hero, and the least he could do was come to check on how she was doing. He had taken his hits before, and he knew that in those dark hours, he had had Altair in the bed next to him. He didn't know what kind of support system she had, but he knew he was going to do everything he could to be there for the non-physical side of her healing.

He gave a knock against the door frame before stepping through the already-open door to greet her.

 

[Astrid al-Bahir]

Propped up on a lifted bed when Varyn walked in, Astrid's remaining arm rested gently against her uninjured leg. A small radio played ambient music interspersed with wordless vocals and other sounds inaudible to human ears. Her degree of injury was immediately visible given her position, eyes closed, and as upright as the nurses would let her be. IV drips did their work to keep things in order, while monitors lit up with various charts and numbers at her bedside. One of whichhandled whatever pain medication she was on.

Grafted burns were covered across her left side, bandages partly hidden beneath her basic hospital gown and going up her neck, across what was left of her left shoulder. Impacted, crushed, then detonated? There was no recovery from that sort of injury. That arm was gone entirely and would be prepared for prosthetic replacement once the burns had sufficiently healed. Her left leg was still wrapped in something to keep it still after reconstructive surgery, along with the ribs of her left side.

She took in a quiet breath through her nose and opened her eyes, head turning to look at the door as someone knocked and walked in. Astrid blinked and straightened her spine in what was probably a painful gesture, though it didn't snow. "Lord Commander," she greeted him with professional respect, like the soldier she was. "Congratulations, sir."

As if she wasn't bed-bound with severe injuries and the recent promotion of this man she'd never really met was of greater note.

@Phoenix

 

[Varyn Atrix]

Varyn stepped inside and saw the injuries were as bad as he had read and been told. A missing limb, another that was in terrible shape, and no shortage of other bumps, bruises, and breaks. He had been in these hospital beds before, and he knew that often the worst thing was the waiting and the boredom.

It felt like it would take an eternity to be out and free again in the world. Or in his case, like an eternity before he'd be able to get back to work.

She started straightening up and he quickly waved his hand away. No, no, please. Stay where you are, he said. While he didn't know her well, what he had read of her psych reports had indicated an almost fanatical loyalty to duty, and that was just the kind of people he knew he needed in the Knights. He was glad he hadn't lost her.

Thank you, he said, chuckling just a bit as he said it. But that's not really why I came here, he said.

I wanted to check up on you. See how you're doing and if there's anything I can do to help, he said. He didn't have many strings to pull, but he had a few given his new position and how long he had been around in the Empire.

 

[Astrid al-Bahir]

After a moment's pause, Astrid laid back against the upraised back of her hospital bed, expression thoroughly neutral. With utmost composure, her tail rose and was laid neatly across her waist before she spoke. "Thank you, sir. I'm told discharge may be possible within a month." That was obviously what the Lord Commander meant. He wouldn't be asking after her personal well-being.

Her tail tip flicked, threatening to sever moderately-priced bedding threads before she moved it across her right shin. Amethyst eyes wandered to the window that gazed out in its confining squares across Raxus. Sometimes at night, the city skylines looked like trees and mountains, speeder traffic like birds and bats flitting through the air. Astrid took a steady, calm breath. Then a pause, a moment's thought.

"I need a higher-grade prosthetic than they're offering me," she said in the same sort of tone as someone commenting on the weather. "If I'm to fight again." Astrid was left-handed. She couldn't deflect fire from her fellow soldiers if she couldn't even wield a lightsaber.

@Phoenix

 

[Varyn Atrix]

Varyn liked Astrid and more than that, he respected the action she had taken, but kriff if she wasn't as stiff as a two by four.

That's good, he said with a nod, seeming to be waiting for something more than just that, but not pressing... yet. Instead, he moved to sink into a chair in the corner of the room. It was... almost as stiff as Astrid which was by extension, almost as stiff as a two by four. Oh well.

The comment about her prosthetic could be problematic, and yet it was a problem that he might be able to solve.

Hmm, he said, running a hand up through his hair. I'll see if I can move some funding around in the Knight's budget to contribute additional toward... whatever the standard is, he said. They were already shorthanded on Knights, and losing another one - particularly as dedicated as her - to bad prosthetics was unacceptable.

But it's difficult to refuse someone who won a medal for gallantry, he said. He had a feeling Miss Two-by-Four wouldn't be as amused as he was and would probably try to give it back, but he wouldn't be having any of that.

And given that I've put in for you to receive a medal and it's been approved, that should help our case further, he added.

Well earned, Knight al-Bahir, he said, with a nod of approval.

 

[Astrid al-Bahir]

Astrid nodded two-by-fourishly and watched the Lord Commander move into one of those hospital guest chairs with a back designed for Jawa rather than human proportions. Then she seemed to go back to the window, staring into whatever she saw. "Thank you, sir." And she kept doing that until Varyn mentioned a medal.

That got her eyes to turn and look at him full-on, tail-tip twitching once. No part of her face moved, unreadable. She spoke up after a brief moment. "I only did my duty." It wasn't a no thanks, though. She glanced out the window again. "How is my squad doing? No one will tell me." Her eyes flicked to an empty hospital food tray and back to Varyn.

"Can medal recipients order takeaway? I'd like curry." She cleared her throat. "Sir." Astrid sipped the glass of water by her bedside. Perhaps the bland food was what kept her pondering the window?

@Phoenix

 

[Varyn Atrix]

Nevertheless, was his only reply to her comment that she had "only done her duty." If she saw it as her duty, he wouldn't break her from that notion, but it was more than most people would have done.

He was silent for a long moment after she asked about her squad, and she had been around long enough that that alone was probably all the answer she needed. There were no smiles, jokes, or lessening the blow.

Your squadron did not fare well, he said, choosing his words carefully. He had nearly said "did not do well" but that could have been construed very differently.

Most were killed in the fall and subsequent rubble. Several more are in the medcenters as well, he said. He pulled out his datapad and thumbed open the casualty reports before handing it across for her to look at the names for herself.

I'm sorry, he said.

There was no easy way to say it, and he let her have the time she needed before she finally asked for food.

Well, I can get myself curry. If you happened to grab some when I wasn't looking, what could I do about it? he said, pulling open his datapad to scroll through for an order of curry to be delivered.

 

[Astrid al-Bahir]

The glass of water was slowly, deliberately placed back down on the table before she grabbed the datapad. Although her face didn't change in the slightest, there was the sudden impression that Astrid felt a great weight upon her wounded shoulders at the news of heavy casualties. Pointed ears dropped ever so slightly. Moments passed in silence as she read down the list of casualties, both injured and dead.

It was at this point Varyn might notice something from his vantage point. Despite the severity of Astrid's injuries and the painkillers that implied, she was rather lucid, what with her ever-present self-control. If Varyn should glance at the machine handling her IVs he'd see why; she was on the absolute minimum amount of painkillers the nurses would let her get away with. There was a button for extra doses that'd been left untouched on a table.

"They were exemplary soldiers," she stated before handing the datapad back, seemingly back to normal a second after she spoke. "I'd like to see them before any ceremonies, if possible."

As for the curry, well... "Thankfully the Lord Commander is known for keeping his eyes closed around curry." Astrid paused. "Particularly green curry. With chicken." Hint hint.

@Phoenix

 

[Varyn Atrix]

I'm sure they were, he agreed, nothing but sincerity in his voice. He knew that she would second guess herself and always wonder, and he knew that was the worst thing she could do. He also knew there was probably no stopping it.

You did the right thing. Don't second guess yourself, he said. You can visit them as soon as the docs say you're good to go, he said. He wasn't going to stand in her way, and he also wasn't going to explain to her that visiting many of them would mean visiting a cemetery.

Ah yes, I have such a habit of ordering green curry with chicken, he said, having never before in his life ordered green curry with chicken. That was fine, though, he'd find something for himself as well.

So, how did you find your way into the Empire? he asked. Although he knew who she was and what she had done and he certainly could have pulled her personnel file, he preferred to hear it from people themselves. Plus it was probably less rude than pulling someone's personnel file.

 

[Astrid al-Bahir]

The woman's face sat static at Varyn's reassurance, but when he was done she spoke in turn. "How much farther could we march, if we were not forced to carry our fears on our backs?" Astrid shook her head, once, then turned to look at him. "Do not worry. I bury my regrets beneath gravestones." Whatever it meant, however Varyn interpreted it, that was the end of that subject.

Astrid sat up straighter for a moment to adjust the bed's back before laying back down, eyes again wandering to the city skyline. She didn't know he bothered- he could just look up her file- but she would answer. "I was born on Indupar, among those living outside the cities. My family were merchants and became dissatisfied with things, and left for Imperial space. Because I am Force-sensitive, they were allowed through. From there I was tested, moved to study on Serenno, then Ziost."

Her ears twitched. "I grew my understanding of the Force and my personal philosophy. When the Sith were ousted, I remained with the Empire."

@Phoenix