Sentient The Draconian

[TinyGameBox]

INTENT
---My Intent on the Creation of the Draconian is for fun and rp potential

• I want to make a new species that would resemble a dragonborn from Dungeons and Dragons somewhat closely as I must admit I do love dragons and Dragon people
• From a story standpoint I wish to create something that is unique to the (larger) governments of base starwars.
• I am not simply looking to create ONE character with this species but Instead a united planet trying to find it's way in the galaxy.
• I find it hard to put in written words on my plans But I hope this is accepted at some point

GENERAL INFORMATION

• Name: Draconian
• Designation: Sentient
• Home Planet: Draconia
• Average Lifespan: The Average lifespan of a draconian can Last around 500-750 years, However Some exceptions have lived up to 1500 Years. Only 2 Have lived longer then that.
• Estimated Population: 14 Billion
• Description:
  • Humanoid Reptiles
  • Scales come in many simple colors (Ex, Blue, Red, Green, Brown ETC)
  • Large Tails
  • Sharp Claws (Hands and feet, also located)
  • Some Variants come with Wings
    • The Wings are normally about 1.5 -2 times the arm length
    • Provide Flight for a short time (25-30 Min continuous)
    • Able to glide from a fall

PHYSICAL INFORMATION

• Breathes: Type 1 and Type 2 Atmosphere
• Average Height of Adults: 8 Feet
• Skin color: Red, Black, Blue, Bronze
• Hair color: Same as Skin, If any
• Distinctions: Males would have shorter Tails but bulkier bodies, And Females have a slightly larger chest
• Races: Two
  • The Worker (Smaller Variant. Simi-common) Wings Are VERY RARE-None
  • The Common (Standard, Most common) -Wings are Uncommon
• Force Sensitivity: Rare
• Breeding: Egg birth OR Live birth
  • Egg Birth is Natural and Most common
  • Live Birth CAN happen if Proper conditions are met, But is Extremely rare
    • (Ex.) Egg birth Is dangerous
    • (Ex.) Egg Birth is Hindered

Strengths:

• Strong Scales- Draconains have scales that help protect from harsher conditions (Ex. Hot deserts, Rocky or cold Terrain) but do not make them Immune to said Conditions
• Warrior/Defender Past - For Much of their History The Draconians had been in some kind of war, especially before they developed FTL-travel. They know how to fight for the Defense of their Own people. Under the Current King and Kaiser, They now dedicate themselves to fighting for others if they can
• Natural Strength -They are as strong as wookies

Weaknesses:

• Low Birth-rate - Due to the size and age limits of this race, birth rates are very low in comparison to most other species
• Slow -While the Draconains are very Intelligent and wise, they tend to accept new technologies and culture a little slower then most factions.,
• Full of Pride and Ambition -The Draconians Like most others are not Immune to Pride and Ambition. Many of the species find habits filled but their very pride, and may get aggressive if their pride is questioned or shattered

CULTURE

• Diet: Omnivore (Will mostly eat meat however)
• Communication: Spoken, Body Communication, Minor Telepathy
• Technology level: Galactic Standard
• Religion/Beliefs: Similar To the Mandalorians, They believe in an Honor system, and Believe the greatest of their Kind are reincarnated as great dragons after death. There Honor System Dictates that during times of war, that any warrior has the right to pick there death, be it ally or enemies. In times of peace, No warrior will try to inflect a war, and combat is a last resort.
• General behavior: Will Engage in aggressive Diplomacy, However will never cross certain Lines as Dictated by there code of "Draconian Honor" Peace will always be prioritized rather then war

HISTORICAL INFORMATION (As told in Draconian History Holo's)

—PreHistory—

(Eons Before-25,025 BBY)

--- Prehistory

• -The Birth of the First Ancestors of the Draconian Race a Species called the 'Dracon'
• -The Dracon Created the planet of Draconian employing powerful magics. Using "The Arcane Powers" (What Draconians Call the force) to create the land and seas of Draconia, and giving it plenty of resources and arable landmass for future species created by the Ambitious Dracon

---100,000 BBY

• The Final Creations of the Dracon lead to the Ultimate success. The First True Draconians are created and born into the Galaxy on the Planet of Draconia
• The Dracon Split into many factions about how to treat their new creation. The two main groups are "The Way of Dornim" and the "Way Of Corvis" Each led by the Dracon Leads of the same name
  • Dornim Lead the Faction to Treat the Newly made Draconians as Slaves for galactic Conquest
  • Corvis Led the Faction to Treat the New Draconian Peoples with Kindness and non-interventionism
• After 100 years of Brewing Tentions, The factions Went to war with each other. The Dracon War had Begun.

---90,000 BBY

• After Ten-Thousand Years the Dracon War Ended with the Eradication and/or Exile of All Dracon
  • The War was at a stalemate for most of the war and no side wanted to back down
  • In the Final 200 Years, the Draconian (Having gained full autonomy) Was fed up with the constant battles Devastating the land
  • The Draconians Joined The Way of Corvis Leading to the Creations of the First House. "House Corvis"
  • With the tide turned Dornim and his followers were completely Eradicated.
• The Remaining Dracon Went into Hiding Deep within the caves and underground in both Fear and respect of the Draconian Newfound power
• The Draconians Were Now left to their own Devices.

---80,000 BBY

• The Large Planet Of Draconia had been scouted by the Primitive Draconian People
• Power-hungry Draconians started to form Empires and Kingdoms.
• Many Wars a peace deals Go on for Much of History
• Draconian Slowly Evolved To fit their Environment
• Draconians Struggle to Introduce New Ideas into Society Leading to Technology Stagnating

—Unifications—

--5,000 BBY

• While Not yet Unified Under one banner, A major function had Begaun spring up in power. The Decedents of House Corvis had Formed "The Knights for All"
• The Great Unifications Crusade Has Begun

---4,470 BBY

• "The Knights for All" Annex and Unifi The planet and Reform into the "United Lands" A dictator Lead Empire
• Many Revolts had started planet but most were put down swiftly.

---3,948 BBY

• The Birth of the First Future Monarch

---3,390 BBY

• The Rise of the "Peacekeepers"

---2,910 BBY

• The Peacekeepers Overrun the"United Lands" and Reform into a More acceptable Simi-constitutional monarchy called The "Draconian Empire
• The start of the 'Archo-Home Project"

—Old Republic Era and Draconian Golden Age—

---1,998 BBY

• The Invasion of Draconia
  • Invaded By the Sith and their armies without warning

---1,997

• Almost All Draconians Enslaved after a few short Pyric battles
• The Re-emergence of the "Peacekeepers" To help Disrupt The Sith's missions on Draconia
• The Creation of the Unnatural Metal "Draconian Steel led to many innovations. Mostly in warfare and defense due to the conflict

---1033 BBY

• Due to the ending of the Sith war, and the massive success of Gorilla warfare, The peacekeepers can take back their home planet.
• The Great Rebuilding Era has begun
• The Archon-Home projects Begins again after the war's end
• Draconians Lose their isolationism and start to make plans for space flight by reverse engineering much of the Sith Tech

---957 BBY

• The Archon-Home Project Expansion after Stage 1 is Complete
• The First Fleet Is created in orbit with 3 Corvette Sized Ships
  • The autumn Fall
  • The Peace-fire
  • Eternal
• Formation of 'DragonStar' A Company placing (Metaphorical) arms in almost every Industry Planetside

---101 BBY

• Birth of 'Archon' Future Lord Admiral Of the Small Draconian Fleet

---92 BBY

• The Start of "Project Apollyon"
  • Stage 1: Create the Orbital Ring
• 'DragonStar' Becomes The Primary Company for the Draconian People
• The Birth of the Future Kaiser 'Dorian'

---33 BBY

• Stage 2 of "Project Apollyon"
  • Populate the Orbital Ring

—Draconian Involvement In the Clone wars—

---22 BBY

• Start of the Clone Wars
• 'The Draconian Empire Becomes a Minor Power and sides with the Confederacy.
• 'DragonStar' is assigned to rebuild/repair Droid ships, As well as provide Resources to the war effort
• 'Peacekeepers' are Assigned to Nearby worlds to Keep peace within the systems
• Draconians refused to Give the Metal now called 'Draconian Steel' to Confederacy forces for use in the war.
• Draconains allowed the Confederacy to Use Draconains Steel Only for planetary Infrastructure
• First Widespread Use of Laser-Biased Weapons' within the Draconian armed forces, Ballistic Weapons are still used and Upgraded for an equally destructive but different role
• Project Apollyon Stage 2 Completed, Stage 3 Starts
  • State 3: Arm the Orbital Ring
• A small Fleet of 10 ships led to a battle over Draconia, Leading to Archon's Promotion to the rank of 'Lord Admiral'

---21 BBY

• Republic Special Forces prevent Full Use of the Orbital Ring by use of Arc troopers
  • Also Hinders 'Project Apollyon'
• The Future Kaiser "Dorian" Joins the Draconian Armed Forces and quickly rises to the rank of 'Sergeant'
• DragonStar gains blueprints of many of the Droids used in the war and quickly starts to remake the droids for their uses
• The Creation of the first DX Droids
• The Creation of the ProtoType droid C.O.L.E
  • Cyber Offensive Law Enforcement Droid
  • Deemed Too expensive for Mass Production
  • 150 Ever Made

---20 BBY

• Republic Forces Invade Draconia.
  • While Gaining some ground Troopers are kept aware due to Gorilla Warfare and Mobile Doctrines
• Dorian Is promoted to Captian and Leads the Ground Forces to repeal the Invasion
• Separatist Droids are sent to help with the invasion

---19 BBY

• Full Repeal of Republic Forces
• Betrayal of the Separatists due to desperation
• Draconia Leaves the Confederacy and makes peace with the Republic
• Dorian Leads the Ground forces to defeat the overwhelming droid force
• Peacekeepers are used to Keep the Peace and Garrison in the massive Capital city and Its many Underground rail-jet systems
• The Droids Shut down
• Formation of the Galactic Empire
• Order 66
• DragonStar Claims and starts to scrap the droids Believing the war to finally be over

—Imperial Era—

---15 BBY

• Draconia and Its ring are bombed by ISDs.
  • The Orbital Ring is left Uninhabited and Shattered
  • An Estimated 6 Billion Draconians were killed in the bombing, Including the Current Royal family and most House Leaders
  • Dorian Leads the Remains of the Populace deep underground below the Captial City to protect them
• The Defense Of Level 545
  • First Imperial Attack on Level 545
• Dorian Led a force of 500 Against 2000
  • 1425 Imperial Losses
  • 319 Draconian Losses
• An Imperial Assassin Attempts to Kill Dorian by means of a bomb, the Attempt Fails but severely wounds the still alive 'Lord Admiral' Archon
• Archon Is put into Status in order to preserve His life
• Dorian, in Anger, unlocks dormant Force powers and uses this to take the lives of several Imperial Prisoners in a pure Rage
• Dorian Swears never to use his or any power for pure evil

---14 BBY

• Imperial Admiral Offers an Honorable Defeat of the Draconians in a Ceasefire.
  • The Draconians are Offered A deal to Work with the Empire, in exchange for Protection and Freedom
• Dorian Accepts the Ceasefire and Agrees to Work with the Empire so long as the population is out of harm's way but stays skeptical and ready to fight back if the deal is broken
• Imperial Admiral Agrees
• Archon is Allowed to be Healed with Imperial Tech, So long as he leads a small fleet against a growing Pirate/Rebel Threat Threat
• Archon Is Healed by a Full Metal suit (Similar to Vader)
• The Draconian Protectorate is Established
• Dorian Is Placed as Leader as A sign Of Goodwill

--- 4 ABY

• After the Death of the Emperor and The Empire falling apart, Archon Comes back to Draconia With a small fleet of Imperials who seek Refuge after being Promised By Archon that It will be safe
• Dorian Accepts The Imperials, giving them citizenship as a sign of goodwill
• The Celebration of the Empire Fall is Celebrated
• The Draconian Empire is Reestablished
• Recreation of The Captial City Starts
• The Blueprints for new ships are created

—The New Era (This RP Site)—

Whats It's Blank...Well Better start RPing soon then

 

[The Good Doctor]

The `Intent` section is missing from the required infomation is missing. It is mandatory to have before a submission before a full review is done.

Speaking of intent, there is already another dragon-like sentient species I have already reviewed, and just skimming the write-up there is a lot of overlap with the two. (dragon-like traits such as wings/breathing, elemental variations, long-livedness, their honor systems being similar. etc .etc

There might be some differences, but they are pretty similar at a glance. I am not particularly keen on approving multiple dragon-humanoid species. While thinking about your intent, I would also consider how to meaningfully differentiate the two. For example, If the other dragon species gets approved, and the same purpose/niche for this species could be achieved with the other, then there isn't much reason to approve this.

I would also check out the notes i left for the other species while you are at it. Some maybe applicable here.

Let me know when edits are done. Or if you want me to archive this submission, I can do that for you.

 

[TinyGameBox]

@The Good Doctor
Not Only did I add a (Hopefully adequate) Intent section at the top, But I also Added a breeding subsection cause I saw that was missing as well

 

[The Good Doctor]

Thank you for the edits. Sorry for the delay, I'll make my review as comprehensive possible now. I will do this in bullet points. Also

• Now that the other dragon-species race has been archived to inactivity, we don't have to worry about that anymore. But some things i made on that review stand still.
• Can you put the appearance of the species in more detail? Are these literally humans with scales or sometimes wings, like the previous species apparently was? Or are they more like the Dracthyr from Warcraft or Dragonborn from Baldur's Gate 3? I see the dragonborn mentioned, but if possible I would like to see an image or two for the species so we can have a clear picture. If they look like a Dragonborn, you can have a picture of them.
• I did always want to see a species like the Dragonborn or Dracthyr. But lets keep this species more grounded in Star Wars and in Scifi. I'm not sure elemental dragons really seem star warsy, seems to fantasy to me. So on that note:
  I am more open to the idea of fire breath however, but they work the exact same as the flamethrower function and fire resistance from the armor functions list with the caveat the breath can be used once in a pvp. Or if you want, you can opt to omit the breath weapon and/or resistance if you want to remove this complication all together. I do appreciate the recoil as a draw back for it, but the reason i ask that the breath weapon (if you want to keep it) work the same as the flamethrower is to eliminate ambiguity on how it works if it was used in a PVP against another player.
• In the beginning of the history, i would greatly downplay the importance of your species' role in the Republic. They may have contributed some number of ships, but the Republic had access to planets as such as Kuat, Fondor, Corellia .etc which were their bread and butter for ships.

Some smaller things I need addressed or need clarified on

• A note would be classed as a reptilian species, same as the Krayt Dragons, the Arkanian Dragons .etc
• For the rare draconians that have wings, can they fly? And if so, please list in strengths. If not, please note it somewhere.

 

[TinyGameBox]

Thank you for your review here is what I got before the Edits I have made

• "Races: Two
  • The Worker (Smaller Variant. Simi-common) Wings Are VERY RARE-None
  • The Common (Standard, Most common) -Wings are Uncommon" Already has the Two most common Variants of the species linked

The Worker is more of a kobald Looking thing. Its more of the same species But evolved for different task
The Common is the body shape and type of most others.

I simply Like to Link the Images for the overall page looks a bit more clean

Yes they were Originally Biased of Dragonborn from DND (Same with Kobald) However I found a "Unidentified Species" (Thats a link) that looks a bit like what I'm going for

I would also Ask if I can keep the Dynamic breath attack but the different Elements be more cosmetic rather then a different Damage type or range. Just for extra Flavor

AFTER EDITS

1. I Have gone to all links and Bolded and Underlined all clickable ones so its easier to see
2. I have Changed the History Quite a bit Which Might lead to some...Deletions for Acceptance (Maybe maybe not We'll See)
3. I just like the Number Three I think that is about it

I hope you get to this soon as I want this to be my biggest writing project I have ever done
@The Good Doctor

 

[The Good Doctor]

Thank you for the edits. Sorry for the delay getting back to this, as it had alot changed. We are getting closer.

Just to be clear, any tech specifically mentioned in the lore article will more than likely need to go through the normal tech approval process if you want to use it in the RP.

I would also Ask if I can keep the Dynamic breath attack but the different Elements be more cosmetic rather then a different Damage type or range. Just for extra Flavor

Can you clarify? Do you mean like a `lightning attack` would work like the flamethrower function, still doing fire damage?

In any event, either way I still don't find the concept of elemental breath weapons/resistances to fit in star warsy. So I will have to remain firm on this point.

Also I still need these touched on
- The species needs to be stated as classified as reptillian
- If Draconians with wings can fly or not. If not or if so, please state it on write-up somewhere.

 

[TinyGameBox]

When Opening this thread again my heart was pounding that I would get something that was at least 2 pages long stating a lot wrong, I am please to see that not much of the history had problems and It is a Huge relief.

For everything in the History's that is not already known in star wars lore "For example "Project Apollyon" "Peacekeepers" and Others WILL get follow-up Posts and threads before I use them in RP. That will still be a lot of work

In regards to the Breath attack Issues, Upon further thinking I think I will follow your advice and Keep them all breathing Fire and fire only (Except in the very few cases in special NPC's or something that I will work on later).

I will classify them as Reptiles and Will add something extra on the Wings, I simply got caught up with the history and forgot

@The Good Doctor

 

[The Good Doctor]

Going to have to reiterate that the flamethrower will have to work exactly like the flamethrower function [click this link and scroll down to flamethrower] (so that we know it's effects with no ambiguity ). This will have to specified on the write-up and at most it would only be able to be used once in a pvp (which also needs to be explicitly stated.)

Also we are removing the various elemental breaths, the resistances should be removed from the write-up as well. Even flame resistance on top of potential flight, and fire breath is going to be OP if people decide to play as this species.

But yes, at this point the only problem is the racial traits.

Let me know when edits are made.

 

[TinyGameBox]

God Rid Of resistance and Fire Breath, To much to deal with
Added things in their Place
@The Good Doctor

 

[The Good Doctor]

Ok. I had to see what all had changed since the previous round of edits.

So super strength is fine. Maybe say an adult Draconian is as strong as an adult wookie.

So now that we have `Strong Scales` here. Seems fine that the Dracos can be resistant to hot or cold environs. The level of protection described 'weak' is vague and can be problematic when stacked with armor, and even if it's 'weak' it could be a game-changer.

So what you would need to do. Clarify that the scales let can make the Draco resistant to hotness/coldness in the environment (not immune though).

Also, since we have gone several rounds of changes/feedback here, I would appreciate if new additions were not added in or swapped in for something else at this stage.

Anyways, if edits are done we can call it a day.

 

[TinyGameBox]

So super strength is fine. Maybe say an adult Draconian is as strong as an adult wookie.

I added a little Excerpt in the Strength Area, And I did make them average around 850 Pounds of Average Strength. (Which is only 40 Ibs stronger then a Wookie)

So now that we have `Strong Scales` here. Seems fine that the Dracos can be resistant to hot or cold environs. The level of protection described 'weak' is vague and can be problematic when stacked with armor, and even if it's 'weak' it could be a game-changer.

I did want to keep them as a natural armor that will chip away, As it was evolved to be a more Natural Armor so I did say blades would do little, Kinda like how Metal armor would work on knights

Also, since we have gone several rounds of changes/feedback here, I would appreciate if new additions were not added in or swapped in for something else at this stage.

Ill try my best not to

Anyways, if edits are done we can call it a day.

Should be @The Good Doctor

 

[The Good Doctor]

So natural armor combined with regular armor that anyone can wear would be extremely problematic. Even taking a single extra blow that your opponent would not be able to do is a huge advantage in pvp. Going to have natural armor be removed. environmental protection is as far as I will go.

I also see wookies and trandoshans as the benchmark of a maximum strength a species can have. Not any more than that.

 

[TinyGameBox]

While I do believe there are races stronger then both in star wars I will fold
-Scales only act on weather or planetary conditions
-As strong as a Wookie
@The Good Doctor

 

[The Good Doctor]

i am aware there are. But I am not approving of them :) Generally speaking of course

Anyways,

Approved! Congratulations!

 

[TinyGameBox]

Yippie Thanks man Now...Planet time