Ask Tatooine Cry Me A River

[Emryc Thorne]

Emryc hadn’t been expecting such a question from her. He had known her for some time and she normally put up quite a front. The half Sephi simply stared at her for a moment, finding the question to be almost romantic or poetic in nature. The thought brought amusement and he drew in from the cigarra, speaking as smoke plumed out again, “Did I kriff away all the hard layers to get to the gooey center?” He asked quite bluntly, turning back to pick out his clothing while the cigarra hung from the corner of his lips.

He found a navy jacket he liked, and he slid that over to the side. He would pick out the dress shirt to go with it next. Emryc spoke after a moment as he settled on one he liked, “I do,” He said before glancing over at her again, quirking an eyebrow, “I also like long walks on the beach. And I don’t mind the sand,” This was followed with a casual wink before he next focused on picking out pants.

Emryc had a habit of meditating outside when given the chance. He had been caught several times staring up at the skies, and he had never noticed that about himself until she asked the question. Despite being space born, there was something entirely different about gazing up at the galaxy from a planet.

@GABA

 

[Darth Tiamat]

She must have caught him slightly off-guard with such a question, his silence told her not to expect an answer and she would be ok with that response. Though, it must of been something that made him curious enough to respond and Tiamat grinned to the question. She knew there was a lot that she kept guarded, her question surely would be a rare glimpse into her softer side before the walls would close. Rolling over, she folded her arms under her chin, resting it on top as she watched Emryc continued to pick out his clothing, clearly more meticulous than what she would ever pick. Her general decision making involved comfort and if it didn't stink yet, then it was still good.

Her eyebrows rose as he responded to her question. Him? Really?

Tiamat's eyes narrowed and then she smiled as he looked over with a wink, "I will hold you to that." she said and then fell quiet, tilting her head to rest her cheek against her arm. She though of the places she had enjoyed looking at the stars, and well, the beaches too, though she didn't think she ever looked at the stars on the beach.

"Growing up, we had a summer home on the coast where two oceans would meet. I loved being there." she hummed, eyes closed as she reached into her memory, nearly smelling the crisp, salty air. There was something that brought her a peace when she thought about it, and though she attributed it to a time of innocence, there was something deeper that connected her to it.

"I'll stay until I finish decoding the activation codes." she decided, eyes still closed as she rested her head. Though that timeframe could have very well meant either a few hours or a few days, depending how quickly she could read through them.

@Sreeya

 

[Emryc Thorne]

Emryc said nothing in response for a moment as he next picked out the right shoes. He had brought a small collection with him, having to always plan ahead for media appearances. The tabloids were just waiting to write on any stupid segments over a missing cufflink or mismatching socks. He had to be meticulous about every single article of clothing. Some backwater planets had become such huge fans that kids ran around with fake pointed ears.

He turned to look at Tiah for a moment, eyes scanning over the way she was draped across the bed. The fiery red hair framed the delicate angles of her face, and her ivory skin was still just a little flushed. She had been lanky and scrawny when they had met, and she had transformed far beyond that since. While he had taken his time exploring every bit of her body, it was something else to admire her in her entirety. He made a mental note to teach her how to wear more flattering clothes.

“What happened to that summer home?” He asked as he finished up preparing for tomorrow. Emryc walked over to the bathroom attached to the room, deciding he needed a shave, “You can’t take me to places like that instead of shitty open fields on Lothal?” He called out as he looked at himself in the mirror.

He mentioned nothing about the activation codes. Emryc knew that gave no indication of time, but it didn’t matter. He was here to do a job and he would see it through. Having her company was certainly quite a bonus for the otherwise dull affair.

@GABA

 

[Darth Tiamat]

As he walked by the bed, Tiah grinned, able to smell his cologne as he headed to the bathroom. She heard him ask about the summer home and she frowned. That story was not a happy one, she remembered overhearing her aunt and uncle talking about the money they made from the sell. What made matters worse it was shortly after the death of her parents and she made sure they knew how much it hurt for them to do that. It would have been the first time the police were called on her. She felt herself turn her head as though she were looking away from the scene as it replayed through her mind, anger sparking in her heart. "I will have it back one day." she said, though she was uncertain if she were answering herself or Emryc's inquiring.

She remained quiet, though a grin appeared thinking about where they had arrived on Lothal compared to where ideally one could have gone. It would have been nice if it were on a beach instead of that field and winding up in the town in the middle of nowhere. "You've never asked me to take you to any places." she countered, which was true, in fact, she found it rare for him to ask her anything, and by now, she really didn't think too much of it. It was how things were.

"Once I can figure out the codes, I can replicate the gates, and we can literally teleport to anywhere in the galaxy." she explained, the numbers and symbols from her work already running through her head from where she had left off earlier. She pulled her knees into her chest, feeling a chill in the room and suddenly missing the warm of Emryc next to her. It felt like it took more effort than needed to pull the corner of the sheet over her body.

@Sreeya

 

[Emryc Thorne]

Emryc appeared to be focused entirely on his shaving. Even his shaving cream was an expensive brand named product. Normally he didn’t bother too much, but media appearances demanded that he take extra care to avoid nicking himself. He leaned in to begin working at it, always preferring a completely clean shave for the media.

“Why one day? Take it back tomorrow and stop plotting long term vengeance like a kriffing cartoon villain,” Emryc said casually as he stared at the mirror, infuriated at spotting a blackhead on his nose. While his Sephi side usually spared him from most trivial human issues, the human half often liked to sneak up on him sometimes.

He finished up shaving and cleaned his face off, dabbing on some aftershave that usually perfectly complemented the cologne. Emryc leaned into the magnifying mirror to look at the blackhead, “You’re never around for me to ask anything,” He called out from the bathroom, “But if traveling around the galaxy means you pick up fashion tricks like matching lingerie, I won’t complain.”

Emryc grinned to himself as he spoke. He drew back after a minute, his nose perfectly clear again.

“Are there any risks to using the gates?” He asked after a moment. The entire concept still seemed very wishy washy to him. And that was coming from a Force user.

@GABA

 

[Darth Tiamat]

A frowned formed quickly into a pout to his response about her plotting vengeance. She opened her mouth to begin justifying why she wasn't plotting and how she really didn't think about the home until now, but decided against it. Quickly she buried the thought of being back on Corellia any time soon, there wasn't time to lazy about on a beach and even as she laid on the bed here with Emryc she knew she was wasting time that could be used in decoding the gates. The silence continued from her as he commented about her not being around in the first place, her thoughts clearly elsewhere, but her blue eyes followed his shadow along the angle of the floor while he moved through his grooming routine.

Tiamat felt a wind of energy as she sat up on the bed, letting the sheet settle around her waist when he asked about the risks of using the gates. She felt that was an obvious question, it was unknown technology, of course there would be risks. Though she came off as someone who liked to play things safe, her thirst for seeing this through bordered on reckless in some ways.

"Plenty..." she shrugged, "One could walk in and never walk out..." she started ticking off what seemed an endless list of risks, "It could create a hole in space, explode, implode...go to the wrong world, be exposed to a massive amount of radiation..." Tiamat scooted to the edge of the bed and grabbed the robe she was wearing earlier and slipped it back on. She walked over to the bathroom door, leaning against the frame.

"Same risks we take jumping through hyperspace, I'm not worried."

@Sreeya

 

[Emryc Thorne]

Emryc listened to the risks, thinking of how the list could very well be endless. He wasn’t keen on Tiamat killing herself in the pursuit of this knowledge, but he had long since given up on telling her what to do. As she arrived at the doorway, he stopped what he was doing to look up.

He stared at her for a moment, his gaze softer than the usual blank look, “I’m not going to tell you to stop, but I..” He paused for a moment, picking his words carefully. He cleared his throat, “It would displease me if something unpleasant befell you.”

Emryc looked back at the mirror, rubbing a hand over his clean shaven chin.

“I don’t wish for you to despise me because of what happened between us,” He said after a long moment. He looked at her again. He wasn’t the best with words, but he also felt more comfortable with her to attempt using them. Emryc looked as if he would say more, but he blanked, and his face followed suit with eyes staring blankly.

@GABA

 

[Darth Tiamat]

He didn't say anything when she listed off the risks, but she could tell he was thinking about something. There wasn't the typical blank look he would give her when she spoke, his tone was not one she heard very often either. It made her uncomfortable but in a way drew her in to his words and not to find a way to leave. She glanced down, find a stray lock of her red hair and started to wrap it slowly around her finger as he reassured he would not stop her in her work. His pause though made her pause for a moment and she met his gaze while he expressed his possible displeasure if something were to happen to her.

In a way, Tiamat was not surprised and she broke from his sliver eyes to look at the lock of hair, she was uncertain how to respond, though her cheeks warmed slightly. This was not the first time he had expressed his concern for her well-being and showed it to her in several ways, to which she often threw him in the dirt afterwards.

He returned to the mirror and she stepped inside, sliding onto a cleared spot on the countertop next to his assortment of products used in his grooming routine. Her legs dangled over the ledge as she watched him in the mirror, she was quiet as she let her thoughts pick at what he meant by despising him. Tiah's head tilted slightly, waiting for him to continue, but he didn't and instead was met with his familiar blank look, no hints to what he was thinking would surface. She never thought him as one to be sentimental, and to express himself to her was rare, possibly risky as she was also known to throw it back at him. To despise him...it was misplaced if there was any contempt for who he was, she still harbored a self-hate deep in her own psyche, thoughts she kept more in check, but there were times she challenged her own competency not for the better.

"I don't despise you." Tiamat was uncertain of how Emryc saw her, their dynamics have certainly shifted, but she wondered if he held any inner doubts regarding her. It was hard to tell with him. "If I didn't want this, I would have stopped." she twisted her red locks over her shoulder, "Do you despise me for this?"

@Sreeya

 

[Emryc Thorne]

Emryc turned to regard her for a long moment after she hopped up on the counter. As always, it was difficult to tell what he was thinking. Face was as blank as ever, silver eyes frosty. Emryc stepped towards her, placing his hands on either side of her on the counter. He didn’t move any closer, casually standing before her.

“Perhaps the question I ought to ask,” He stared into her eyes, “Is whether you despise yourself for it,” Emryc hadn’t missed the brief fidgeting from her here and there. All that hair twirling was new, and there had to be a reason something changed this time after several years of knowing one another.

He had taught her to be self confident and own everything she did. She had said she did as much, but that didn’t explain the self doubts that were almost tangibly obvious.

@GABA

 

[Darth Tiamat]

He turned to her and Tiamat shifted as though she were going to get, down, but stopped when Emryc placed his hands strategically on the counter, keeping her in place. She looked down, noting where his hands were placed and frowned as he spoke again; her blue eyes met his gaze she opened her mouth to speak but stopped, instead she grinned and shifted uncomfortably, feeling herself leaning back some. She gave him credit for knowing her well enough to stand so she could not flee physically from the question.

Tiamat reached up to gentry run her fingers along his smooth face, tracing along his jaw down to his chin, her grin faded, "That is the correct question." she hummed, her eyes flickered while her fingers trickled down to his chest, lazily tracing along his skin. She let the silence settle, her gaze lowered to watch herself dance her fingers across scars.

"Its a good question, because I did, I despised all the feelings I have tied to you. The harder I pushed myself to turn away from them, I was reeled right back in." Tiamat spoke, her fingers stopped and she rested both hands on top of Emryc's own as she reached into the Force, feeling the threads of their bond that connected them, "Its the one thing I can't flee from, so I must fly straight into it." she said looking into his frosty silvers, "To feel all of it...to feel all the love I hold for you."

Her face held a deadpan stare, one that seemed to mimic Emryc's own blank gaze, but there would be a heaviness to her words as though she were realizing her acceptance of her confession. She wasn't too keen about sitting and waiting for his response; there were repercussions for such feelings and Tiamat already felt she was on borrowed time for allowing herself to have them. The Sith pulled her knees to her chin and turned slightly to threaded her legs on the outside of Emryc's arm to slide off the countertop.

@Sreeya

 

[Emryc Thorne]

Emryc had expected a lot of different answers, but that word hadn’t been one of them. It was rare for any expression to manifest on his face, and at that moment there was genuine surprise. He was far too close to her to recover quick enough, and he didn’t bother trying. Emryc’s eyes were wider, brows slightly elevated.

Silence hung between them for a moment as her hands layered his. She moved her legs back and over and he didn’t make any moves of his own. However, before she slid off entirely, his arm layered above and in front of her waist to block her from going. He tilted his head slightly to look at her.

“I’m a monster, Tiamat,” He said simply, “You’ve known that to some degree from the first day you met me. I never hid that from you and I don’t hide that today,” Emryc looked firmly into her eyes, “Understand exactly what it is that you claim to love. Understand that it is something far beyond just a handsome face and a man that just so happened to treat you decently after the others hadn’t.”

He held her gaze for a moment longer before his arm slowly slid away from her waist to free her. Emryc was easy to be drawn to, but few understood or could accept the twisted monster he truly was. They wanted him on the surface but would turn away the first chance Raze emerged. There was just the slightest glint of yellow in his eyes as he finished speaking. He closed his eyes, looked away and exhaled slowly. When he looked at himself in the mirror, the gaze was silver again.

@GABA

 

[Darth Tiamat]

She didn't think he would say anything, but the look on his face spoke told her she had caught him off-guard. Still, she did not think anything said now would be productive. She had felt as though she had been drowning, and now she had caught her breath and wished to sit in that moment regardless of how brief it may have seemed. She had not necessarily thought of what she would do next after sharing such feelings with him.

Emryc had reached over to stop her from getting down, she inhaled deeply, ready to retort for him to let her go, but when she met his eyes, she held her tongue. He spoke about caution, reminding her of who he was, and pressing for her to question her feelings for him. Tiamat listened closely, watching the flakes of yellow bleed into his eyes, brightly contrasting against his natural silvers. He went to turn back to look at the mirror, releasing his arm from around her waist and allowing her to slide down.

She didn't leave and instead wrapped her arms around his waist (she swore he had gotten taller) and rested her head against his back, breathing in how good he smelled. "I know, I have thought about it all... and there's nothing I can do to stop it inside me without it consuming me." she spoke holding him a little tighter, "You can't tell me to not to, just like I can't tell you to stop fretting over my safety." Tiamat paused and exhaled slowly, "I love all of you, the monster, the politician, the teacher, you and any part that you haven't shown me."

She closed her eyes, "Just let me." she softly added, even she was uncertain if she was telling him or herself to give her permission to this solace.

@Sreeya

 

[Emryc Thorne]

Emryc had expected her to walk away, but she remained. He watched the traces of gold melt away from his eyes as he felt her wrap her arms around his waist. Her hands traced over the rigid musculature of his abdomen, his eyes fixed on his own in his reflection. Her head pressed against his spine and he didn’t budge from where he stood.

He heard her out, his jaw tightening just the slightest bit at the comment around his concern for her. He wanted to contradict her, but he couldn’t. Instead he stood still as a sentry, not moving his own hands to touch hers but also not stepping out of her grasp. She felt warm against him, and that warmth enveloped him in the way she held him tightly. Her words felt like sharp jabs that threatened to put dents in his resolve. They were wholly unexpected. Silence hung between them for a moment as he stewed on the words.

“It is already consuming you,” Emryc said very quietly, eyes never shifting from his own silvers staring back at him. He was still reeling from the confession. They always had an odd tension about them and they danced around it for years. Emryc’s mind focused on several different things then.

He tilted his head to the side as if to look over his shoulder. Emryc couldn’t see her, but he wanted her to know he was addressing her directly, “I won't stop you as long as you understand that you love a man that may not say those things back.”

It was what he had told Renfry as well. He had seen how much fear Renfry had shown when Raze was out in full force. It was near impossible to love that side of him.

@GABA

 

[Darth Tiamat]

"I never needed you to ever tell me those things." she responded, slowly tilting her head up to catch the corner of his eye and then lowered her gaze, "Nor do I expect for you to start now or ever." Tiamat rested her cheek against his back, his body still stiff, unmoving except for the natural breaths he took.

"You just do it...even if it is with that blank look you give." there almost was a curl of a smile from the woman as she thought of many times when his gestures never matched the expression on his face. Tiamat then also fell into stillness, she knew he probably needed to finish getting ready, but she couldn't muster the energy or command to release him. The idea was carried away in her mind, rapidly swept away by other thoughts and justifications she wanted to tell him. And when she finally found her center, she let go, releasing him from her embrace.

She opened her mouth to say something, but instead, she stopped, feeling enough had been said, at least for the time being. As much as she wanted to believe she had control, he was right at least, it was consuming her. Like an incurable disease, she knew deep inside she was on borrowed time until a monster much like his own would devour her. A chill crawled down her spine and through her limbs giving rise to goose bumps along her arms and the back of her neck. A forbidding reminder of what resided with her.

Tiamat paused to see if Emryc would say anymore before grabbing her brush off the counter, trying to find some act of normalcy as though pouring one's heart out was entirely something she just did.

@Sreeya

 

[Emryc Thorne]

Emryc was silent when she spoke, though he did look over curiously when she expressed that he just did it. He chewed on those words for a moment, considering the implications. Love was a foreign and perplexing concept to him, but he had been venturing into it more lately. He understood enough to at least know one thing for certain.

“And that’s enough?” He blurted out. He knew he wasn’t giving her what she sought from him. He wasn’t sure he would be able to or be capable of it. It wasn’t something he controlled, and that’s exactly why it frustrated him to no ends. Emryc pondered on his own questions, surprised he even asked it.

He turned to look at her for a moment, watching her as she brushed strands of her fiery hair. It was almost mesmerizing to see, and the silver gaze followed every movement. After a minute, a grin spread across his face.

“You can feel what you do for the type of man that would do things like they do on Holo with the flowers and the dates,” He paused, amusement dancing in his eyes, “And instead you pick the one that sold you to a Hutt for spice.”

He shook his head, thinking of the very bizarre journey they had been on. Emryc walked past her and out of the refresher, deciding to go to the other one for a nice, long shower. He had a lot of things to mull over and he wanted to center his mind once again.

@GABA

 

[Darth Tiamat]

Her eyes widened in surprise when he blurted out his response, he sounded as though he were in mild shock and some disbelief. She glanced at him in the mirror while working through the tangles in her hair, tilting her head to create more tension between the strains and the brush.

"Yes." she said and internally she frowned, wondering what about it he was thinking it would not be enough for her. After all, was it not her decision to decide that and why did he worry? What would he eventually think of her if he were to see what she truly was capable of. Tiamat closed her eyes, finding it hard to concentrate on any one thought as she brushed her hair, focusing on the strokes in a pseudo-meditation as Emryc simmered beside her. She would hear him speak again, though his tone more lighter than before as he tried to convince her of the ideal man from romance holos and yet she picked him.

He would be terrible in a romance holo.

Tiamat opened her eyes, grinning, "Sold?" she scoffed, "I remembered you did not even ask for a single credit, you just gave me to the that Hutt." Her movements slowed as she watched him leave the refresher and then she stopped, setting down the brush on the counter. She grasped the ledge tightly, her legs felt entirely like rubber and slowly she lowered herself to the floor. Tiamat dropped her face into her palms, resisting the urge to scream and give herself some relief from the rabbit hole she had started down. The cold floor was welcoming as she collapsed onto her back, starring quietly at the ornate ceiling before finding the strength to stand on her feet again.

She didn't see Emryc in the bedroom or studies, assuming he went into the other bathroom and perhaps that was the best right now. She was uncertain if she could handle anymore right now and quickly she changed her clothing to lose herself in her kata and drills.

@Sreeya

 

[Emryc Thorne]

“Nonsense,” He called out as he walked away, “I got a huge bag of spice for you that I sold at an excellent profit margin.”

Emryc took his time with the shower and came out a while later. He dressed in a simple hoodie and some sweatpants, dismayed to see the pants were getting too short for him. His height was outpacing his wardrobe at an alarming rate.

The half Sephi walked over to the living room area, plopping down on the sofa with a laptop. He decided he would do some work while having something on in the background. Switching the Holo on took him to the news channel. Unfortunately it was his own face that met him, but it was tabloids. There were speculations about him and the Queen of Naboo, followed by further questions prodding at the love life of the mysterious Emryc Thorne.

He found the tabloids entertaining enough to keep watching, and he decided to order some room service. He normally ate incredibly healthy, but he felt like indulging himself. Making a compromise to himself, he settled on chocolate covered strawberries as they were still fruits.

Emryc settled on casually sitting on the couch, feet up on the table, popping strawberries while watching the media either gush over him or tear him to shreds. And naturally he had his glasses on.

@GABA

 

[Darth Tiamat]

The gym of course was empty, giving Tiamat the space and privacy she needed to lose herself in practice. It was difficult to tell if there were anyone else staying in this place other than Emryc. It was almost eerie with it being mostly unused, though if Emryc's plan worked, this place could explode in commerce. The Holo's were on and Emryc's face was plastered on every story that was being announced, Tiamat paused, reading the headline that ran at the bottom of the station regarding him and the Queen of Naboo. It was enough to make her chuckle as she waved her hand, switching off the devices.

She would run through her stretches as she created a barre from the equipment in the room; at times it felt absolute bliss to be able to find her physical center while deepening the burning sensations of her muscles. Her mind removed itself from her confession to Emryc and she was able to turn inward, exploring further of the sensations and images she had seen the evening before while completing her kata. They could have meant nothing in particular, but the curiosity was there. In fluid motion, she moved from her barre stretches to her kata, carefully watching her footing as she moved, stopping occasionally to correct herself. However, nothing more came, and Tiamat left it be for now. She would the fall into her drills; this of course was something she could easily allow her mind to fall into nothingness, it was where she wanted to be, her escape when she was trying to physically leave.

Her muscles would quickly exhaust before she would become mentally exhausted. Even with the Force, she could feel the wobble in her thighs as she worked to keep upright, gritting her teeth as she would make her way back to the room.

It didn't click right away when she saw Emryc sitting on the couch with his ankle pants and computer, but there was something just slightly off. Though Tiamat wanted to pass it off as something she was just making up, she had to stop and do a double take as she walked back over to him, "Are...? You're wearing glasses?" she sounded skeptical, given she never heard of a Sith...or any space wizard in all her stories from childhood needing glasses. Tiamat folded her arms, tilting her head slightly as she studied him in his sweats, "And you get on my clothing styles...this looks frumpy..." she sighed.

@Sreeya

 

[Emryc Thorne]

By the time Tiamat arrived, the channel switched over to Huttball. He was popping another strawberry into his mouth, only half paying attention to his actual work. In order to avoid touching the strawberries, he actually took the effort to float them over with the Force and pop them in. He refused to touch them and wipe his fingers off each time before typing on his laptop.

Emryc didn’t look her way when she spoke, chewing quietly on his dessert as he watched another score for his team. He finally swallowed and pursed his lips inwards to run his tongue over them. Whoever came up with this combination for a dessert was a genius.

“No,” He said, unamused, “I’m wearing traditional face decoration seen only on the Sephi planet Thustra,” His gaze flicked to her with a mild glare, which was unintentionally adorable with the glasses. His eyes followed hers to his pants which were riding up more than usual.

Emryc shrugged as he floated another strawberry over, “I can get naked if you’d prefer,” He said flatly as the strawberry dropped into his mouth. His fingers clacked on the keyboard as he sent off another email.

Eyes went back on the screen as he wordlessly offered the bowl of chocolate strawberries to her if she pleased.

@GABA

 

[Darth Tiamat]

She had started to repeat traditional face decoration... when she stopped, catching the glare he gave her that was harder to take seriously when he wearing his glasses. "You're cute with glasses." she told him with a hint of a grin while he gave her a shrug over his clothing selection, seeming entirely comfortable and chill. He suggested being naked and Tiamat shrugged, "Only if you keep on the glasses."

Her eyes followed to the strawberry and she noted how he was not using his hands to eat; it wasn't like they were messy like hot wings that were covered in sauce, which sounded good. He offered some of the chocolate strawberries and Tiamat grabbed a couple and sat down, her attention drawn to the Huttball game. She recognized the one of the teams, recalling how she saw the logo in his quarters. Her eyes seemed to be glued of the excessive amount of gore that went on a play-by-play analysis. The game was highly illegal in the FWA and only existed as myth and rumor in the core worlds. She remembered her parents talking about a gambling bust involving Huttball showings; the next day at grade-school, she was the cool kid for sharing her evidence with classmates that it existed.

Holding a strawberry in each hand, she took a bite from one, delighting in the flavor combination. "What happens if one team is completely out of limbs to cut off? Do they lose until next season?"

@Sreeya