Ruler of the Hill

[Baroness]

I reincarnate into a furry minx..thing. Walk up to Viggy's twig throne, and make him give it up with my sick wiles. Simple really.

 

[Ares]

I heal myself with my awesome powers of awesomeness, and come back to the sick, twisted lovers. I electrocute them both, and punt them off the hill. I become paranoid and increasingly insane after seeing Viggy and P.H.'s "exchange" and I seal myself in a sphere of 15-foot thick lead. I survive this because I am ARES

 

[Kath]

I come back as a reincarnated Stalin and chuck your ball of lead off the hill with my communist awesomeness. I rule the once again communist hill.

 

[Izz]

I use the high school rule of seniority. I am two years older than you, and therefore force you off of the hill. I then post a "No wannabe communists" sign next to my position atop the hill.

Mah hill.

 

[Fynar]

Me in my inquisitorial robes with a group of torturers come up the hill and arrest twitch and then have him burned at the stake. Then several hours later he finally dies and I rule the hill completely.

 

[Jiang Winters]

I sic a hentai tentacle beast on Fynar. Long story short, he's raped, he dies, I take over the hill and burn all his torturers at the stake.

I build a throne out of chopped-off fingers, grab a scepter made of a femur and skull, and declare myself... Erm, something that has to do with ruling the hill.

 

[Viggy]

I sic armour-bear-cavalry on Hakim. Not only do I mean that my troops are riding armoured bears, but the bears are riding horses and the horses are driving battle tanks. Needless to say, Hakim and his tentacle lose. I declare myself King of the Bears on the Hill.

 

[Izz]

I call in a Tyranosaurus Rex piloting an X-wing to destroy Viggy's bear-horse-tank things. He succeeds with little effort, and guards the hill as I take my place as king.

 

[Beanie]

I call in a Tyranosaurus Rex piloting an X-wing to destroy Viggy's bear-horse-tank things. He succeeds with little effort, and guards the hill as I take my place as king.

i mesmerize your T-Rex with a huge peice of meat, and make him follow me into a canyon with lots of sharp rocks., he crashes, my hill.

 

[Izz]

You never got rid of me, so I shoot you with a pistol that I happen to be carrying. Still my hill.

 

[Viggy]

I steal Twitch's pistol right out of his pocket and pistolwhip him in the head. Then I empty the clip on him, and claim the Hill again.

 

[Beanie]

Enraged, I come back with my huge piece of meat and beat viggy to death with it. I then break the meat up into pieces, bury them in the ground and grow them into mindless burger babies that will devour any opposers to my hill.

 

[Ares]

I seduce the burger babies with my awesome sexiness, and sic them on you. They eat your flesh, and then I cook the Burger Babies, medium well done. I replace my recent dinner with the Titans, who all do whatever i say.

 

[Izz]

I call in Zeus, my badass brotha from da hood, and he locks all your pretty Titans up in Tartarus, leaving you defenseless against the greatest god of all. You suffer his unstoppable wrath, and are thrown to the farthest edge of the universe. I then take the hill.

 

[Ares]

When Zeus sees that he locked up one of his sons- I am ARES, after all- he sets me free, and he butchers you for your treachery. Then he sets me free, and gives my Kingship of the Hill.

 

[Viggy]

I seduce Zeus and then convince him to banish ARES to Tartarus forever, with ARES-proofed walls on his cell. I then betray Zeus and become King of the Hill.

 

[Beanie]

I suck Zeus and Ares and all the Tartarus stuff into the Age of Mythology expansion pack "Titans" with a vortex. Then I take the hill and defend it with a Wumpus.

 

[Ares]

Tartarus is ARES-proof, but it's not...

DEMON-proof! I free myself in demon form, and unleash the might of my awesome demon vortex-space-twisting powers to escape the Expansion Pack.

I come back and butcher you all in a demonic fury, half-devouring your bloody carcasses... And the Wumpus.

I control the Hill.

 

[Izz]

I call down a holy meteor shower that completely destroys you, and then I take my place as king.

 

[Ares]

I brush aside the meteors- I am not an evil demon, per se- just a power hungry one. There's a difference.

However, your insolent attempts to kill me are... most displeasing. I squash you into the ground like the cockroach you truly are, and continue ruling the Hill.